So, my friend is an addict...

[1114]

... and he constantly interchanges the truth and lies to conform to whatever his current mood is. He lies about using a specific drug, then tells me he's lying later on when he wants to spill his guts. Sometimes it blows up in his face, like when I found a pill bottle in his car the other day, then he backtracks and lies about what he told me previously. The week before that he told me that he was done with that certain drug and couldn't have it on him

He's my friend and I care about him, but I hate being lied to. I told him that I didn't like being lied to, but he told me that he lies to everyone until he's ready to talk - which I believe to be true. It's funny that he thinks this behavior is OK...

Would it be wrong for me to say that I don't want to hear him talk about drugs because I know he'll bullshit me?

 

[Dave]

I don't think that he thinks that the behaviour is okay, but rather that it is what he thinks that he needs to do. It's a not-uncommon thing to do: don't burn bridges until you've used the connection up. In this case, I think that the fact that he comes clean with you on occasion shows a) that he still really values your connection, whatever the nature of that may be, and b) that he does not think that what he's doing is right. If b) wasn't true, he just wouldn't stop lying.

If it bothers you that he's lying to you, then you should tell him that. But the best thing that you can do for him is to keep that connection open. Don't let him use you, but remember that he may need you someday to get clean. Of course, that's far easier said than done. It sounds like he's at the point now where he is ill; he no longer has a choice, really, as to whether or not he uses. A day will come when he seriously wants to quit-- and that's when you could help him. Until then, you should do what seems right to you.