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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

So long, folks'

Thanks man, it means a lot.

I'm back on it but its all that helps right now, that and the D....edri..... Spansules (trying not to trigger, I use them legitamitely though so I'm not glorifying anything).

Klonopin withdrawal in the accute stage reminded me sooo much like the first time I ran out of my effexor age 15. Of course then I thought I was just going crazy and hadn't realized I'd missed two doses, punching walls, crying fits, catatonia etc.

I usually suffer at least a 4 day break a month due to insufficient regulation. Never again. Hoping to be down to 2.5mg per diem by the months end, but we'll see. My doctor is caring and told me to stick with the 4mg daily script because he was worried I'd run out.

Think I'll do some serious transcribing from my journals tomorrow.

Thanks again for everyones support. This community truly allows folks like us to not only find wonderful and intelligent people to befriend, making the world that less lonlier, but give hope to the countless numbers of gifted minds having trouble existing in todays psychoticlly depraved culture.

Anyone ever feel like shooting me a PM I'd be delighted to respond. I prefer helping others as a general rule, another reason why you won't catch me making threads in TDS often.

Cheers.

S.
 
hey, Thou, welcome back. <3 Although I wish that the place had lived up to what you were hoping it would be, I'm glad it gave you a bit of respite and time off klonopin. I'm heading over to Words to see if you posted anything.;)
 
Thou, I wish inpatient had helped you. I'm quite relieved that you are still thriving. I urge you to be safe, whatever you do, and to value your freedom. The marginalization and consumerist culture that exists in society is disgusting to me. I hope that you are drinking a lot of water, eating nutritious food, sleeping well, and overall regaining your happiness. I am confident that you will continue to thrive even though the world is indeed a fucked-up place a lot of the time.

I will send you a PM this weekend to explain how I know this. I wish you peace and a clear path to happiness. I hope that believing in yourself as an intelligent, sentient being will come easily to you. It's hard work, for sure. It is easy to mentally flagellate oneself through guilt and shame mechanisms. It is the everyday that matters.

As to the Klonopin, it helped with my panic disorder. I didn't take nearly what I was prescribed, and still don't (now I am prescribed Valium). I hope that you will consider a safe and medically supervised taper. In the interim, you can make use of techniques that don't involve doctors or pills. Deep breaths. Meditation. A walk through the neighborhood. A call to a friend. Developing healthy coping mechanisms is very empowering.

Please, be well - and don't give up.
 
Fuck hope fuck this species i pray for a fucking comet to come and vaccinate this

..FUCKING PLANET FROM THIS SIMIAN FUCKSHIT CUNT SPECIES

I just got back from the fucking pharmacy only to find that my insurance has been canceled for NO REASON ANYONE CAN GIVE ME

I can't even get in touch with the fucking cuntsucking weasels who made the decision because they don't open until tomorrow.

I have 300 dollars worth of medicine sitting in a fucking pharmacy and I can't do shit about it. I've got 8mg of klonopin left and no money, just finally got all this shit together for this stupid job no telling when this fucking agency is going to give me work and I WILL NOT GO THROUGH BENZO WD

I'M SO SICK OF BUILDING UP HOPE AND GETTING CRUSHED JUST BEFORE I GET A CHANCE TO DO SOMETHING WORTHWHILE


LAST FUCKING STRAW



IF THESE FUCKERS DON'T REINSTATE MY INSURANCE IMMEDIATLEY I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO.

It will involve a lot of fucking blood though.

What a helpless feeling, like a fox in a bear trap. I'd rather eat poison than go through this again.

"We seek a Total Solution to the Shit Problem: Slaughter the shits of the world like cows with the aftosa. Then we'll all feel a lot better."
 
Aaah shit Thou that's awful :( - is there any way anyone else could provide you with the benzos in the meantime? You really shouldn't have to go through forced benzo withdrawal, I mean no...
 
I won't.

If I can't, I'm jumping off a building. Plain and simple.

I'm sure I can get the 30 dollars to fill the script but I'm just so sick of this nonsense catch22 bullshit.

Get a job, medicaid goes away. Then lose job because I have no medicine because the job means I don't have healthcare. Repeat.

I've been goign through this for 13 years and I'm sick of it.
 
Please don't do that. I've really enjoyed talking to you and I for one would be devastated if that happened and I know I'm extremely far from being the only one who would feel that way.

I do understand how tireing this must be, I really do, but please hang on okay?
I think if you go to the ER and tell them you're going to go through forced benzo CT withdrawal they will be able to help because it's such a danger to your health.

If you need to talk to someone I'm on facebook :(
 
I'll do my best.

Thank you for caring <3

I just need to be alone for awhile I'm going to listen to George Carlin for a while. He's saved my life more than once.
 
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