• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

so confused

well, in every realationship i have had besides this one, i would get bored after 2 months and want out. but this is different. i never want to lose her, and i defiantly dont get bored of her. she really is the perfect combo of strenght, love, nurture, funny, caring, and HOTNESS haha
 
Man i just wanted to post to say fuck i feels 4 ya loseing someone you love, that means the world to you in this way is never a nice thing, something i wouldnt even wish upon a foe.....heartbreak. Ive had my heart torn in two more than once and thres little that dulls the pain.
But over time it will go away its ur destiny to move on, the Universe has spoken, Hang in there friend things will get better, do what u gotta do jus dun go TOO stupid crazy on da drugz ay!?
best wishes and kindest regards, my thoughts will b wit u
hang in there :\
 
so i get a phone call, its bobbie(GF) and im like ohh cool, because she hasnt been allowed to talk to me. i answer, and its her mom. she says i need to leave her alone, and this realationship is over. she really hates me. after i made the hardest decision in my life to be sober, and change, this shit happens. im done. so done. fuck bieng sober, and fuck love. its a surefire way to get shit on.
 
Great, thanks Bobbies mom for nothing you ignorant bitch. I mean on one hand I understand where the parents are coming from, but parents are so fucking overprotective sometimes that they really can careless what position they're putting their children in.
Bobbies prob just as pist at her parents as you are, prob moreso cause their her parents and its her freedom that she doesn't have.

Thats a hard situation to advise on, really. I prob would have flipped the script on the mother and asked her to have a fucking heart. Thats just lame.

This same situation basically happened to my buddy a few months ago, but the daughter wound up fighing her parents, and her parents got real smart about it. Over the period of a couple of months they had essentially brainwashed the girl into thinking my friend was some loser piece of shit who would never be successful or amount to anything in life. And what happened is the daughter wound up taking all the shit out on my friend when they officially broke up for good.
It was tense for a while and going back and forth, but one day she basically said "you know, my parents are right, you're fucking worthless". And I remember how in love they were, and I couldn't help think it was the parents who had brainwashed her to that extent. Its a fucking shame bro, but theres not that much inside the law that you can do about it.

I really don't wanna give you any self help lingo right now cause its not the time. I'd be too infuriated to really listen to anyone elses advice right now. But I can say the first 2 weeks are usually the hardest. Just try to keep yourself together *somewhat* for these next couple of weeks. Its hard as fuck man and I'm not gonna pretend thats its going to be easy. Its a shame it had to work out like that but at that age girls aren't really independent enough to choose the life they want... and their parents wind up fucking up a great deal of their lives under their own selfish needs.

Hang in there man, keep us updated if anything changes.
 
I agree with Bo. Take a day or two to think about how fucked up her mother is before you slip off into a self-destructive binge phase.

I understand that some parents inappropriately insert themselves into their childrens' lives, but this is just fucked up. Don't make your own life worse because your gf's mom is an over-protective, conniving, manipulative bitch with no sense of boundaries. You definitely do not want to cause yourself grief just because of some wrinkled-ass old hater who doesn't respect her daughter enough to let her live her own life.

Ultimately, I think that ending this relationship is probably for the best since you said yourself that you're not ready to quit for yourself. Under those circumstances, the effort is destined to fail.

Take care of yourself and don't let that meddling old bitch motivate you to do something that will have negative consequences in your life. Maybe there's a future with this girl when she's an adult and has the figurative girl balls to stand up to her mother. But I don't think its worth waiting for.

Stay strong and be safe.
 
Last edited:
i almost told her exactly what i was thinking, but i didnt for bobbies sake. this is worse than her breaking up with me, because at least i could have gotten her back. and she wanted me back too. but now theres no chance. iv got a strip of acid on the way, and its gonna be a night for bad trips, but in a way, the bad trip will be punisment for me fucking up. im taking all 10 and im gonna cry till i cant anymore. fuck, listen to me, im gonna cry, i never cry. im truely worthless. i have never made anyone happy in my 17 years of life. hell, i might as well throw 1900mgs of DXM in as well
 
^ You make a good point (artaxeres) about the effort being destined to fail. I had overlooked him saying that he wasn't quite ready to quit.
And in those circumstances even if he tried, when you're not at that point yet, it would have most likely made things a lot worse. Like he gets clean for 2 weeks, earns the parents trust back, relapses when he feels confident and like he can hide it, they find out... he gets clean again... earns their trust back, over and over and over.

So in a weird way the mother not giving him any slack avoids that potential cycle from unfolding. But the fact STILL REMAINS, anytime the daughter has to make decisions in the future, she's gonna have a diminished sense of autonomy (control) not knowing what the fuck to do. Thats what happens with people like this who's parents make all the decisions for them. They grow up, and when the time comes to make important decisions, they often make even worse decisions then when they were younger. Cause theres no reinforcement in their ability to judge situations accurately and make wise decisions. That whole feedback loop was robbed by the parents.

It sucks balls, it really does, and I feel your pain my brother.
 
DXMkid420 said:
i almost told her exactly what i was thinking, but i didnt for bobbies sake. this is worse than her breaking up with me, because at least i could have gotten her back. and she wanted me back too. but now theres no chance. iv got a strip of acid on the way, and its gonna be a night for bad trips, but in a way, the bad trip will be punisment for me fucking up. im taking all 10 and im gonna cry till i cant anymore. fuck, listen to me, im gonna cry, i never cry. im truely worthless. i have never made anyone happy in my 17 years of life. hell, i might as well throw 1900mgs of DXM in as well
Click to expand...

Come on man, I know you feel shitty right now but if you go on a self-destructive binge you are only going to make yourself feel SO much worse :(
You are NOT worthless, and you don't deserve to be punished for fucking up. I'm sorry that things haven't worked out with your girl but you WILL be okay man. Honestly, just chill, have a good cry, but take care of yourself and don't do anything to harm yourself, including a drug binge. You will get through this <3
 
well, i thought about it, and i decided to take them. just took the DXM and the tabs. this should be interesting. i have never taken acid when depressed. lets see what kind of monsters we can see
 
^ I knew you would which is why I never told you not to. People don't understand that theres situations in life where you are actually BETTER off using drugs sooner than later. My point being, a sober mind does not by default always make better decisions than a nonsober mind.
What I mean. A heroin addict quits, has to deal with tremendous pain for a few weeks, goes back to heroin, OD's, everyone says his lowered tolerance caused his death. I say YES it played a role, but that person was making a decision with a brain that was in a much more degraded state SOBER than not sober.

Same way people trying to expect you not to use right now, its just not realistic AT ALL... not even .00001% realistic.
You used, and you're in for a trip. Hopefully the trip can help you sort out some things in your mind. Maybe it will be bad, noone knows. But keep being you, and keep doing what you're doing. This is too stressful of a time to drop both a girl and drugs, and anyone expecting that could be from mars for all I know.

Use the drugs responsibly. Don't make any brash decisions. And please just keep any eye out on your behavoir. Sit back, force a smile if it will help, and take this time to think hard about your life, feel the unified forces of the universe (once it kicks in) and try to bring your mind into a good place.
I am not condeming you for using, I knew you would, and I think its best to focus on reasonable goals at this point. Come back to your addiction a month or 2 from now when you're feeling a bit stronger. And do whatever you need to, to cope with life.

One thing I was told by a professional is that you NEVER assualt a persons coping mechanisms UNTILL they have developed more functional ones which TAKES TIME. You don't have other coping mechanisms to deal with life right now, and anyone expecting you to go read a book or listen to music is out of their mind.
Take it slow, take it easy, and we will be here for you.
 
DXMkid420 said:
well, i thought about it, and i decided to take them. just took the DXM and the tabs. this should be interesting. i have never taken acid when depressed. lets see what kind of monsters we can see
Click to expand...

Don't force yourself in to a bad trip though man, you never know, it could turn out to be a lovely, peaceful, healing trip.
Good luck and take it easy. If you need help at any time during the trip please feel free to PM one of us mods <3
 
Breakups tend to be very painful experiences - so I'm sure it's hard to be going through it now. Sometimes these things end up being the best for us, even if they don't seem like they are the moment.

I think Bojangles makes a lot of very good points about coping mechanisms. I just wanted to add that sometimes in a "crisis" situation (or any very intense emotional experience), it's possible to use that momentum to make changes that otherwise would have had to occur gradually over time. So if for any reason you DO feel the desire to stop, and feel that you can somehow use this situation as a springboard for that, then I would say go for it. But whatever you do be gentle with yourself...
 
Yeh thats the funny part is age can actually mean that things hurt more. And at a younger age thats usually exactly the way it is.
Which is why I'm a bit puzzled by ixchs response... he usually knows better. Its not like your some 34 year old man whos gone through 5 divorces and knows exactly how to get on with life. Then maybe I can see saying "stop being asinine and fix your shit"... well no still not quite lol.

Your age just represents that you have less experience with break ups in general, so thats some dumb advice ixch no offense. I tend to love 99% of the words that come out of that guys mouth, and hes one strong mfkr, but that was far too insensitive a remark for my likings.

Keep your head in a good spot, if you have a good trip you could actually learn something valuable about your life. If you entertain negativity from negative posts, that could offset some shit. Think PEACE AND HAPPINESS. Thats what the hippies did... and it seemed to work for them lol.
 
I just read what happened in "she's gone" thread. They should be merged, well you took a bunch of acid and DXM after the mother told you to leave Bobbie alone. So how was your night? You've been on an emotional roller coaster ride these past few weeks. It's devastating and gonna take some time to heal. I feel so badly for you, as you've never had to endure this kind of heartbreak. Like Damaged Lemon said, don't be ashamed to cry. This will help you in the healing process. Like that song "The First Cut is the Deepest" and it's true. Let us know how you're doing. You have people here who care about you, pm me if you want to talk or just vent. ~theresa
::hugs::
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top