I am really hurting right now. I am under pressure from my methadone clinic to stop smoking weed. The thing is weed is the only drug that makes me not want to kill myself. I am on a ton of precribed psych drugs effexor, gabapentin, seroquel and klonopin. I still feel like I would be happier dead.
Methadone has been the lone bright spot on the last year. Not craving heroine is amazing. But if they take that away from me I will get back on heroin and set out to kill myself with this run. I know a guy who sells acetyl fentanyl so I think I am going to stock up while it's around.
I had a dream that I would get out of this hell hole state. I don't care that much about where I go. California. Seattle, philly, colorado. Pretty much anywhere with medical pot and fun outdoor activities. I want to snowboard or surf. But it'd probably a pipe dream at this point. I have no job no money and I'm probably going to end up strung out again once they kick me off the mdone.
Methadone has been the lone bright spot on the last year. Not craving heroine is amazing. But if they take that away from me I will get back on heroin and set out to kill myself with this run. I know a guy who sells acetyl fentanyl so I think I am going to stock up while it's around.
I had a dream that I would get out of this hell hole state. I don't care that much about where I go. California. Seattle, philly, colorado. Pretty much anywhere with medical pot and fun outdoor activities. I want to snowboard or surf. But it'd probably a pipe dream at this point. I have no job no money and I'm probably going to end up strung out again once they kick me off the mdone.