sleeping in my car is nothing like camping.

hey, er been a few days since i blogged. im here at the local public libaray so able to get on my laptop n fuck around on the internet until my dr.apt at 1:30ish, anyways last night was a first of me sleeping at a tuckstop here in uptown bham', shits nothing like camping. wokeup 2342 times, sweating,sticky, nervous, but CLEAN! wtf right? shit didn't even cross my mind to use... i mean i do have some 2cb, but fuck that shit when ur homeless having to sleep n ur car, ill jus save that until im better off, and with a tripping buddy..
i wont go into much detal because most of people know the outcomes, i was discharged from my IOP drug classes because i took a day off running around going to job interviews, so my counsler gave me some shit about that, and not having some of my asignments done, its not like i havnt learnt that shit before, so they were paying for my bed at the halfway house hell i was at, and since i didnt have the $ to stay, they asked me to leave. i left early because i couldnt take it anymore there, last night it was like a dope shooting party, and knowing that i have a drugtest coming up that was enough will power for me to say NO damnit and leave, i just told my thieving ass roomates that i was going to the store and just bounced, had my shit packed anyway (was around 10pmish), so i really had no where to go, no gas $, riding on a quarter tank, but clean. since my family turned against me(tough love shit), i couldnt go to them for help because how they worded it 'im a grown man', havnt talked to them since mothers day, and that was using a homeless persons cellphone to txt my mother happy mothers day.
i'm living the movie pursuit of happiness, but least i dont have a kid with me, shit woulda been awful(plus theres no more room in my car because its loaded down with so much fucking shit. so until i can get some $ coming in, im pretty much limited in what i can and cant do(such as driving around). shit sucks yo, for real. living my old life style,but clean and sober.
i dunno what to do tonight, trying not to think that far ahead, atleast for now im safe and drinking free libary coffee.
until next time
 
sounds rough bro, its amazing you stayed clean.. you should have your head up high for that shit, its very impressive.. hang in there man, shit well get better. take it easy D's.
 
Jeez, man, I hope things turn around for you and quick! It sucks -- the world has a funny way of smacking you in the face... and you when just got clean, too. Be proud of the fact you stayed clean in those circumstances.
 
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