Silent rambling of a loud mute

[mymymymysharona]

Excruciating pain, numbness and misdiagnosis (by self, of course),
Seems to slightly subside-
I’m going to push reason aside,
Tempt it, come up with some sort of bribe:
“Just go somewhere, get lost- go hide!”

Br o k en voice hides b r o k e n soul,
But the yelling did me good.
And I have no more words, just…
…beautiful silence where they once stood.
And fuck, it kinda feels good.

And how refreshing!
After all this testing
Life’s simple pleasures never seemed so subtle
I just gave up looking, but only because
I just gave up too soon.

Hey, you know last night I couldn’t sleep,
So sick and tired of hearing myself weep.
The melody has the same refrain
Except slightly broken from throat s-t-r-a-i-n.

And it’s all so simple really, I’m sure!
Don’t keep pushing the issue, cos you end up wanting it more.
Internal fights with myself, characters I’d never fathomed:
“Truth does hurt, don’t it? But not in the way you imagined”

I’m my own crucial addiction
Causing me internal affliction.
Senselessly asking for benediction,
I’m stuck in the queue- awaiting its fruition.

I’m stuck waiting for you- (knowing you’ve resigned from your mission).

 

[New]

I guess it must be hard when you lose that one person that you used to take solace in...you've communicated that quite beautifully.