Delphinia
Greenlighter
hi all... I have had severe anxiety and daily panic attacks for years. I feel like I have the panic relatively under control, but my generalized anxiety has been bubbling up out of control. I recently started CBT therapy, but am still having a hard time so yesterday I saw a psychiatrist for the first time in hopes of getting a benzodiazepine to get me through the rough patches. I told her about my drug history... I tried xanax briefly years ago and used ativan for about 7 months last year, given to me by my PCP. I've tried various SSRIs, buspar, hydroxyzine, etc. I gathered up all my dregs of courage (I was terrified of being judged by her) and told her I thought a benzo would help me for maybe a month or two. She immediately launched into her spiel about how dangerous benzos are... which I guess is to be expected. She prescribed me an SNRI. I told her about how when I started on my SSRIs, I had horrible cant-sit-still anxiety, so she reluctantly wrote me a script for 2 weeks worth of klonopin, just to get me adjusted to the SNRI. I was nearly in tears. I felt like no one would listen to me... I don't have a drug history, I don't abuse my medication (not that it doesnt sound fun, I just don't want my tolerance to go up!), and I really feel like benzos in a low dose make me feel normal... though I realize its not a long term solution.
She told me to take the klonopin twice daily. I asked If I could skip it on days when I work with my CBT doctor to really deal with my anxiety without help.
"Absolutely not!" she said. "I don't want you to learn that you can take a pill and make it all go away."
I felt like a scolded child. I am so frustrated... I'm an informed adult and I should have a say in how I treat my anxiety. When my PCP gave me ativan for months he didn't seem too concerned how I took it. I fucking hate that I am at the mercy of medical professionals.
So I guess my question is, is this normal or acceptable behavior from a psychiatrist? I ask because this was my first psychiatrist visit.
Thank you everyone!
She told me to take the klonopin twice daily. I asked If I could skip it on days when I work with my CBT doctor to really deal with my anxiety without help.
"Absolutely not!" she said. "I don't want you to learn that you can take a pill and make it all go away."
I felt like a scolded child. I am so frustrated... I'm an informed adult and I should have a say in how I treat my anxiety. When my PCP gave me ativan for months he didn't seem too concerned how I took it. I fucking hate that I am at the mercy of medical professionals.
So I guess my question is, is this normal or acceptable behavior from a psychiatrist? I ask because this was my first psychiatrist visit.
Thank you everyone!
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