@bomber, Two weeks! That's great! You got this, hon. You said "was" so I'm thinking you slipped up? I've redefined "failure" for me. I have a habit of being very hard on myself when I don't get the results in something I was after, to the point that I neglect to give myself credit for how hard I'm trying and how legitimately hard the struggle is etc. But recently I've decided you know what? If it takes me 100 attempts then so be it. Because unless I straight up GIVE UP then I'm not failing. And I'm giving myself credit for getting back up and trying again every time I fall down. This recent shift in my perspective has been most helpful.
Don't give up, you got this, hon

I dint know what your drug(s) of choice is/are. But if you go through my posting history there's a thread titled something like "H withdrawal soon/chronic pain" that's quite active currently. I feel so fortunate that so many really great, kind, supportive people found their way to that thread and posted.
I mention that thread in case you'd like to come join in and get some encouragement as far as trying to stay clean. It's pretty laid back, everyone without exception has been just so nice and lovely so far, and we all understand the struggle. So, check it out if that sounds good to you, you will get encouragement and support there
Take kind, gentle, loving care of yourself.
Peace xo