Sexuality, Anxiety, ED... I'm confused.

[aequus]

Hi,
Just found out about this site while researching this issue I've been having. Found some helpful threads... what an open friendly community of people.

I have had a few problematic sexual experiences in the last years... and I'm trying to figure out whats going on. I'll try to make this as concise as possible.

I'm 26, male. About 6 months ago my girlfriend and I broke up. We had been together very seriously, most of the time living together. Ended because we both felt that we needed to have more experience with love and sex before settling down... Recently I met a girl I really like. We get along well and she is super sexy. Making out and fooling around went really well, giving and receive oral sex was great. We started having sex and everything was going well, till I took a break... then I was done for... no erection and it didn't come back, even the next morning! I really like this girl, and even though she was gracious and cool about it, I'm really worried that I'm blowing this thing before its even started... so I'm trying to figure out whats going wrong. There are some options I'm considering, I'm hoping someone can help me think through them.

1) Performance anxiety -- haven't been with many woman, I really like her... but then why is everything fine when its oral sex?
2) Confused sexuality -- could I be bi/a/homo-sexual -- Is it possible that I could have sex almost every day for 6 years and turn out to not like woman? (Sounds stupid... but I'm getting paranoid I guess, and could use a reality check.)
3) Libido/ED -- If I want to have sex but my penis isn't cooperating... could that still be a problem with depression/libido? (I have been a bit depressed recently)
4) Emotion connection to ex -- my ex girlfriend of 6 years was the only girl I've had sex with... (though i have fooled around with a few others)... could this be messing me up somehow? Is that a thing?

As I'm writing this I feel kind of strange... It seems like I should know these kinds of things about myself at 26. But my mind is spinning and I can't figure out exactly what is going on. Any comments would be greatly appreciated. (Also suggestions about what to do next... if you have any)

Thanks a lot,

 

[freehugs]

Can you try going quickly from oral to vaginal sex? Sometimes these things happen to the best of us.

 

[neversickanymore]

Since you were with the other lady for awhile.. maybe you should just take it a little slower before you begin to fuck.. just get to know this person a bit as it seems you may just not be as comfortable with her so you may just be getting a little gun shy, and if this happens once it can cause anxiety which can cause the problem you are worried about. also since she is a different lady her dimensions will be different and certain positions with with people trying to figure out how they lock up best can cause problems, especially in soft beds.. so I would try the floor as a hard surface can help allot. Another thing is to se if she would be into trying to make it as long as possible before intercourse, I mean make out and fuck around for as long as you can before getting down to business that night, till your ready to fuck a light socket, you know take it slow and relax get super excited but comfortable fucking around with each other.