John Doe wrote: > Hi sexy.....I hope you remember what I look like?...you are one of the sexiest woman I have ever made love to. Dont ever change or lose your passion and beauty which is inside you.....and your external beauty is lovely also. > Love n hugs
March, 2009, 8:41 AM
> Sweetheart, I've got 2 say that i love wot the years have done 4 u. I am turned on even more. If it ever works out that we can have a nite or 2 alone, then I'm urs 2 do anything we want 2 do. How may i pleasure u? Thinkn about sending waves of ecstasy, orgasms rockn ur body gets my pussy wet and my nipples hard. I'd love 2 love u again and again xoxo Your, Jane Doe (hehe)
John Doe wrote:
> So baby I would love to pleasure you as your master for more than just a night....I would love to enter the depths of your mind and release the woman inside you that I adore...to release your desires in passion and beauty and to express it through your body...through every nerve ending through every fibre of your body and then to enter your soul and for you to allow me to go there to make love in the sweetest and most secure way and to trust and give yourself to me totally and surrender to me so that I make love to you by fucking your brains out and for you to feel me as part of you when my cock is inside you and for you to hold my cum in you aftrer I have released it inside you in loving union..........
> You are beautiful and special baby..xxxxxx
So the short letters above give an idea of the kind of lover I haven't had in exactly 8 yrs. I'm keeping my mind set on cyber only, but we were together in real life for a week 8 years ago. Since my affair with John Doe, there hasn't been anyone since him that communicates to me that way, romantically, passionately, not just lustfully. Just the cyber and emails are sweet enough for me, although he has said repeatedly he is going to come out here as soon as he can. I loved the way he treated me before as a lover and sex partner and I am finding out that sensuality, romance, and lust are not gone from me. I've only been with 2 other men that were as attentive as this one is, long before John Doe.
I told him I no longer have my full capacity of physical beauty that I once had, though I didn't go into why. So I liked his older pics, dunno if he'll like mine, but this is the body I have right here, right now. So if he doesn't like it, I will understand. It just feels kind of like a high, opening up another sensation I've not had in so long: sexual pleasure with someone that takes his time. We keep having frequent conversations though and he's told me a few things he must do with me, I've never done. No one has ever asked me to keep my eyes open the entire time we're making love, but most especially right at the time of orgasm. I guess I did it once with him 8 yrs ago. It was different, but how does one go about doing that? I've practiced closing my eyes so long, even during masturbation, its a reflex for me to close them.
He said 8 yrs ago and is saying again now how he wants to see the surrender in my eyes right before releasing myself to him, and he to me. I always thought it sounded soo sweet, but I told him no one had ever asked me that. I'll have to learn to do it his way somehow. lol. I was very touched before at how attentive he was and I still am. Just hearing him tell me somehow makes me experience it all over again and again in my mind. At this point, that's all it is, a matter of him turning me on so much mentally. I wish everyone else knew that or was at least willing to be taught. I've almost always been the kind of person that is attracted first to someone's mind over how he looks physically.
He can be butt ugly, but over time if he's got something special between his ears then thats all she wrote as far as I'm concerned. I do appreciate physical beauty as well, but for me the mental has to come first. He had made some mention also of how he'd love 4 me 2 swallow his issue, but he said, "But I noticed before, u didn't like to do that." Funny how after all this time, he's the only person I finally ever openly and honestly discussed with. "To be completely honest, the reason I didn't do it b4, is because 2 this day that something I still haven't tried." The thought of that used to gross me out, that's why I never did it, even with the man I was engaged to marry.
"Hell John, I guess ud think by now I'd know, but thats another first. I don't know how, just one gf told me she took her bf's cock all the way 2 the back of her throat in order 2 do that. I feel like a 15 y/o. You're going 2 have to show me how." "Nnooooo. No deep throating baby, ul gag. I just want to put the tip of my cock, rest it halfway in ur mouth, u just swallow in one gulp that way." "Ok baby as long as u dont mind that I have no idea what the hell I'm doing, then ok. That would be very embarrassing to be caught gagging in front of u, and that sure doesn't sound very pleasant 4 u." "There is nothing embarrassing about making love. Nothing you should be ashamed of."
"Well u sure managed to pick a lot of firsts for me John." "Have you made love in any woods since we did?," he asked. "No, no woods. Another first and probably last on that one too," I said. Whatever little sex I did have since him has been relatively boring and mundane, if you can even call it sex when the other partner can't keep a woody. I am so turned on and so loving the way John is treating me and talking to me. I love how sweet he was before, very giving lover. This is the only reason why I will even try 2 do something I've always been queasy about. The open eyes too is WHOA!
I've always been shy that way about covering my face at the end of sex, either by my preference in position, from behind, or its 2 dark 2 really see, or if not close my eyes and sometimes cover my face. That right there just told me I'm feeling as if my vulnerability is being exposed and still uncomfortable with the idea to be completely honest. Wow. I don't want 2 see such intense emotions bare naked on my face, because now that I think about it, I've always felt that way. Sadly a word just softly popped into my mind, "protection." Those were barriers I had between myself and to prevent others from hurting me. Condoms were another physical barrier I always used....the exception being John and my ex fiance.
I got tested 4 everything, he did too, but he had been the first 8 yrs ago in a long time to have me bareback, all natural. I was the first person who tried back door as well. I had been very nervous. It was on my last day in Dublin and I dressed up in a French Maid outfit and pretended to be crashed out on top of the bed before it was time to drive me back to Dublin airport. I would not have wanted 2 do any of this if anyone else were asking me for it, all the "its" he's asked me for. Also, on an emotional level this swallowing business feels very intimate emotionally, in fact not doing it is a way to help make sure I keep a lid on my feelings. He's an affair, not a life partner. I've unconsciously all along had these barriers in place to keep me from getting my heart tore up any worse than it might.
I am going to have to have a very honest chat with him about this, because he is being so intimate, but what's gonna happen if I let all these barriers down and I don't want him to leave? I think it's a good thing though that I was completely honest with him. I would have avoided discussing issues that I wasn't quite comfortable with or sure of. It really DID feel good 2 just do it for once instead of go all shy and retreat. I'm tripping on all this shit I just now consciously learned and became aware of about myself.
[/B][/COLOR]
March, 2009, 8:41 AM
> Sweetheart, I've got 2 say that i love wot the years have done 4 u. I am turned on even more. If it ever works out that we can have a nite or 2 alone, then I'm urs 2 do anything we want 2 do. How may i pleasure u? Thinkn about sending waves of ecstasy, orgasms rockn ur body gets my pussy wet and my nipples hard. I'd love 2 love u again and again xoxo Your, Jane Doe (hehe)
John Doe wrote:
> So baby I would love to pleasure you as your master for more than just a night....I would love to enter the depths of your mind and release the woman inside you that I adore...to release your desires in passion and beauty and to express it through your body...through every nerve ending through every fibre of your body and then to enter your soul and for you to allow me to go there to make love in the sweetest and most secure way and to trust and give yourself to me totally and surrender to me so that I make love to you by fucking your brains out and for you to feel me as part of you when my cock is inside you and for you to hold my cum in you aftrer I have released it inside you in loving union..........
> You are beautiful and special baby..xxxxxx
So the short letters above give an idea of the kind of lover I haven't had in exactly 8 yrs. I'm keeping my mind set on cyber only, but we were together in real life for a week 8 years ago. Since my affair with John Doe, there hasn't been anyone since him that communicates to me that way, romantically, passionately, not just lustfully. Just the cyber and emails are sweet enough for me, although he has said repeatedly he is going to come out here as soon as he can. I loved the way he treated me before as a lover and sex partner and I am finding out that sensuality, romance, and lust are not gone from me. I've only been with 2 other men that were as attentive as this one is, long before John Doe.
I told him I no longer have my full capacity of physical beauty that I once had, though I didn't go into why. So I liked his older pics, dunno if he'll like mine, but this is the body I have right here, right now. So if he doesn't like it, I will understand. It just feels kind of like a high, opening up another sensation I've not had in so long: sexual pleasure with someone that takes his time. We keep having frequent conversations though and he's told me a few things he must do with me, I've never done. No one has ever asked me to keep my eyes open the entire time we're making love, but most especially right at the time of orgasm. I guess I did it once with him 8 yrs ago. It was different, but how does one go about doing that? I've practiced closing my eyes so long, even during masturbation, its a reflex for me to close them.
He said 8 yrs ago and is saying again now how he wants to see the surrender in my eyes right before releasing myself to him, and he to me. I always thought it sounded soo sweet, but I told him no one had ever asked me that. I'll have to learn to do it his way somehow. lol. I was very touched before at how attentive he was and I still am. Just hearing him tell me somehow makes me experience it all over again and again in my mind. At this point, that's all it is, a matter of him turning me on so much mentally. I wish everyone else knew that or was at least willing to be taught. I've almost always been the kind of person that is attracted first to someone's mind over how he looks physically.
He can be butt ugly, but over time if he's got something special between his ears then thats all she wrote as far as I'm concerned. I do appreciate physical beauty as well, but for me the mental has to come first. He had made some mention also of how he'd love 4 me 2 swallow his issue, but he said, "But I noticed before, u didn't like to do that." Funny how after all this time, he's the only person I finally ever openly and honestly discussed with. "To be completely honest, the reason I didn't do it b4, is because 2 this day that something I still haven't tried." The thought of that used to gross me out, that's why I never did it, even with the man I was engaged to marry.
"Hell John, I guess ud think by now I'd know, but thats another first. I don't know how, just one gf told me she took her bf's cock all the way 2 the back of her throat in order 2 do that. I feel like a 15 y/o. You're going 2 have to show me how." "Nnooooo. No deep throating baby, ul gag. I just want to put the tip of my cock, rest it halfway in ur mouth, u just swallow in one gulp that way." "Ok baby as long as u dont mind that I have no idea what the hell I'm doing, then ok. That would be very embarrassing to be caught gagging in front of u, and that sure doesn't sound very pleasant 4 u." "There is nothing embarrassing about making love. Nothing you should be ashamed of."
"Well u sure managed to pick a lot of firsts for me John." "Have you made love in any woods since we did?," he asked. "No, no woods. Another first and probably last on that one too," I said. Whatever little sex I did have since him has been relatively boring and mundane, if you can even call it sex when the other partner can't keep a woody. I am so turned on and so loving the way John is treating me and talking to me. I love how sweet he was before, very giving lover. This is the only reason why I will even try 2 do something I've always been queasy about. The open eyes too is WHOA!
I've always been shy that way about covering my face at the end of sex, either by my preference in position, from behind, or its 2 dark 2 really see, or if not close my eyes and sometimes cover my face. That right there just told me I'm feeling as if my vulnerability is being exposed and still uncomfortable with the idea to be completely honest. Wow. I don't want 2 see such intense emotions bare naked on my face, because now that I think about it, I've always felt that way. Sadly a word just softly popped into my mind, "protection." Those were barriers I had between myself and to prevent others from hurting me. Condoms were another physical barrier I always used....the exception being John and my ex fiance.
I got tested 4 everything, he did too, but he had been the first 8 yrs ago in a long time to have me bareback, all natural. I was the first person who tried back door as well. I had been very nervous. It was on my last day in Dublin and I dressed up in a French Maid outfit and pretended to be crashed out on top of the bed before it was time to drive me back to Dublin airport. I would not have wanted 2 do any of this if anyone else were asking me for it, all the "its" he's asked me for. Also, on an emotional level this swallowing business feels very intimate emotionally, in fact not doing it is a way to help make sure I keep a lid on my feelings. He's an affair, not a life partner. I've unconsciously all along had these barriers in place to keep me from getting my heart tore up any worse than it might.
I am going to have to have a very honest chat with him about this, because he is being so intimate, but what's gonna happen if I let all these barriers down and I don't want him to leave? I think it's a good thing though that I was completely honest with him. I would have avoided discussing issues that I wasn't quite comfortable with or sure of. It really DID feel good 2 just do it for once instead of go all shy and retreat. I'm tripping on all this shit I just now consciously learned and became aware of about myself.
[/B][/COLOR]
