Mostslepton
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2007
- Messages
- 198
note: this shit's long
Track title: "Seperated Chambers'
running time: 7:39
http://www.yousendit.com/transfer.p...798995&email=ad0dd856fa6e482c338cfdbb83b3b292
Now, I don't know if there is a designated area for audio art here, but I'll go ahead and throw in the link. Its somewhat on some spoken word tip, I did it in one take and if you can look past the bad quality (I'm an artist, not a producer), by all means do so.
Lyrics:
invasive surgery purged me of devotion
this notion I don't get until these emotions
cease their explosions and I can accept this
exclusion from this affinity and therefor acceptance
nobody can have this gift its just too tremendous
my offering's off and awful offspring of antipathy
have been bred as it bled and I head to a deathbed
inamorato with a broken bottle
two vulnerable veins and a maimed motto
I remain hollow but stand tomorow
to borrow another day of sustained sorrow
quality's the emphasis through attempts to quantify
something I can't verbally express so I die inside
forever devoted until every letter's decoded
allegiance eroded temporarily so I wrote this
hoping to focus I sent for blue lotus
admired and respected this ardency and honesty
enamoured not with this but the concept, see
but was it a fallacy, was I a stepping stone
I got so close to the light as it shone
I was blinded to find it again, willed by darkness
regardless of that it's not heartless
the smartest approach is to hope for a coach
and to know what's intended; this sweet reproach
this slice so nice, perforates every facet
of our consonance
red drips like faucets the fastest
decorates what it splashes like fashion
misery acts as a fascist
where lancets are portals
this is reciprocity
against the numerous atrocities
perpetrated against humanity
compliance, subservience demanded in me
I can't stand it and I see
this corrosion of conformity
and everybody who's normal seems
to be deformed swarms and they're cold
but this performed warmth grows until it burns
like hot coals
I've got this passage into my stream and charcoal
soley subsisting so its relentless
you're mentally driving me over the edge
till I'm physically driving me over the ledge
still I'm spiritually striving and sober I pledge
to get rid of these drives and to go on ahead
this image of you and this tune in my head
it won't leave me alone, like your gun to the head
ponder this incessantly, rarely do I forget
and the few times I do, I have those dreams again
gulping and clenching and really just tensing
convulsing and sobbing because of what I'm sensing
till I vomit and promise that this is the end here
I know it this time and hence all the shaking
mentally breaking, racing and pacing
tires on the pavement, rain on the windshield
thunder within earshot and wonderful beer's got
these blue things going down the tube
no wipers so I'm blinded and winding
down this road from the whining and wine seems
to add to the affliction, so sad I had addiction
so bad I couldn't kick it, not glad to be the victim
last minute brake applied as the brain's supply
is cut off, and brakes were cut off,
mentally take a break inside as I wake and sigh
sentences are runons, talking about what I said's soft
momentum simply builds and it heads over cliff
as I fall I affirm that I'd get it right next time
I can hear a voice saying it's your last rhyme
no time to think of anything but "this sucks"
and at this point I'm so loaded I'm fucked
I wonder whether this shit will explode when it's touched
by the hand of God and the burden's off these
shoulder's this soldier's a loner and bones hurt
I roll like those bolders and hold a tight grip
it can't end like this, but I can't accept this!
sick to my stomach, and feelings aren't coming
ripped something from it, soul's cold and so lonely
nothing much there but cold indifference
indignant, I dig it and love that real wicked shit
but anything except this... like I said can't accept it
guess I'll die without a soul and hope it's like before I was born
yes I'll try to doubt this hole and cope just like before
mess I'll fry or float on clouds and do it again
perspective shift is the difference between you and a friend
I crawled towards the light alright became a creature u crushed
like a moth to a flame I never overcame my stupid impulses
what they find they won't even be able to say what the pulse is
first time I ever smiled when I felt that inner peace
of knowing I'd soon be essentially at ease
from the inevitable storm of chaos followed by eventual release
I suppose joined in a different reality is how this was meant to be
funny 'cause you lack comprehension of what this meant to me
another wave of expression in an apprehensive stream
or a demented dream as a mental protest against what you went to see
I know it's overly dramamtic, the whole scene's cinematic
this reaction automatic, end results are tragic
as I woke from that night mare I laughed and reazlied
it only gives me white hairs, breeds wrath and reaks of lies
so that's when I decide to look back and do it right
I wish I never existed but I don't want to lie
underground so I tried a slightly different approach
saved some cash and skydived
stapled a note to my chest addressing the pain
looked out the plane as I prepared to dive
took a breath and a sight, dove and pondered a bit
dosed in midair to hold the poisons inside
removed my shute and the spair
and as I fall through the air I wish I could take it back
the longest ten minutes of my life
by some miracle a tree broke my fall
and as I lay there impaled I see the absurdity
of seeking this fate and slipping into obscurity
dangling hundreds of feet above the ground I puke at some point
there goes the toxins I ingested, maybe soon I'll be joined
I slip as the branch breaks and give everybody handshakes
metaphorically off course as I exit this course
***
I found the body of a male, bones broken and bruised
lieing right outside my campsite, I did the only thing I could do
called certain numbers and now I'm intriguied
to see what he saw, so I listen to the reports
he's in critical condition, someplace in a coma
I was only on a visit from Cali to Arizona
I guess this person figured he was to be a goner
but something had different plans, as he's getting more stable
they found a note with him that read of truths and of fables
it read the following, as best I recall
"yes I'm sick of it all, but it's not what you think
I can't have what I want, so I wanted to slip
I don't want to die, I just don't want to exist
don't blame yourself or anybody else
I'm a grown fucking man, and everything's planned
if any given event shouldn't occur, then it obviously wasn't meant
otherwise it would have, despite how sad the event
"I deeply hurt inside, so I go flirt outside" read that shit on the DV
in the freestylez thread now I'm out of my head
wish I could erase it all, without leaving one trace
don't want anybody else to be seen as bad because of this
but I was so fucking close and I'm sad because of this
a couple times in my life, events I remember
almost had it just right even wack ties all got severed
what led up to this was a combination of factors
as I grow older my heart gets colder and blacker
misery loves my company and it's unevenly distributed
so I listened to some music, hence I have a message
to the media that claims this is the thing that did him in
don't try to perpetuate those stereotypes because music is art
entertainment that's it, this is real life you dig?
and the wide range of human emotions we're all subject to
have been around since time immemorial
I used to want a long life and wish I was immortal
now I seek out that portal, so I can just be at ease
I never consciously knew that I wanted to be loved
I don't want any sympathy and I can't be saved by a hug
and this shovel's getting heavy, the way this grave's being dug
so I'm finally doing it because some things are beyond my control
told myself I could handle it, I guess I was wrong
said look bitch you're blessed and you're strong
and you have all these attributes, for this the rest of 'em long
take a trip or get drunk and maybe listen to songs
fix your shit and keep on, just fucking move on
but remember this is a cummulative effect
and each day's just too long, I can't shake these feelings
cannot take back those shady dealings
or be saved by hatred or humour, nor meditation or scriptures
not even medication or convictions, can't delete the pictures
can't erase that message, or forget what it represented
it all returns to one truth, so without further ado
I'm gonna do what I do, live life your own way
don't fucking question what I say
my truth is subjective, yours is just different
I'm tired of the pain and I'm sick of the ignorance
in my mind sounds a gong, it's time to get gone
never think of me as a failure, just hold me in your memory
and we can keep it the same, maybe meet on the otherside"
***
so what's the deal with this guy, I heard about on the news
I think he's doing alright, making a recovery, right?
maybe I don't know, wait hold up wake up he's inside
Track title: "Seperated Chambers'
running time: 7:39
http://www.yousendit.com/transfer.p...798995&email=ad0dd856fa6e482c338cfdbb83b3b292
Now, I don't know if there is a designated area for audio art here, but I'll go ahead and throw in the link. Its somewhat on some spoken word tip, I did it in one take and if you can look past the bad quality (I'm an artist, not a producer), by all means do so.
Lyrics:
invasive surgery purged me of devotion
this notion I don't get until these emotions
cease their explosions and I can accept this
exclusion from this affinity and therefor acceptance
nobody can have this gift its just too tremendous
my offering's off and awful offspring of antipathy
have been bred as it bled and I head to a deathbed
inamorato with a broken bottle
two vulnerable veins and a maimed motto
I remain hollow but stand tomorow
to borrow another day of sustained sorrow
quality's the emphasis through attempts to quantify
something I can't verbally express so I die inside
forever devoted until every letter's decoded
allegiance eroded temporarily so I wrote this
hoping to focus I sent for blue lotus
admired and respected this ardency and honesty
enamoured not with this but the concept, see
but was it a fallacy, was I a stepping stone
I got so close to the light as it shone
I was blinded to find it again, willed by darkness
regardless of that it's not heartless
the smartest approach is to hope for a coach
and to know what's intended; this sweet reproach
this slice so nice, perforates every facet
of our consonance
red drips like faucets the fastest
decorates what it splashes like fashion
misery acts as a fascist
where lancets are portals
this is reciprocity
against the numerous atrocities
perpetrated against humanity
compliance, subservience demanded in me
I can't stand it and I see
this corrosion of conformity
and everybody who's normal seems
to be deformed swarms and they're cold
but this performed warmth grows until it burns
like hot coals
I've got this passage into my stream and charcoal
soley subsisting so its relentless
you're mentally driving me over the edge
till I'm physically driving me over the ledge
still I'm spiritually striving and sober I pledge
to get rid of these drives and to go on ahead
this image of you and this tune in my head
it won't leave me alone, like your gun to the head
ponder this incessantly, rarely do I forget
and the few times I do, I have those dreams again
gulping and clenching and really just tensing
convulsing and sobbing because of what I'm sensing
till I vomit and promise that this is the end here
I know it this time and hence all the shaking
mentally breaking, racing and pacing
tires on the pavement, rain on the windshield
thunder within earshot and wonderful beer's got
these blue things going down the tube
no wipers so I'm blinded and winding
down this road from the whining and wine seems
to add to the affliction, so sad I had addiction
so bad I couldn't kick it, not glad to be the victim
last minute brake applied as the brain's supply
is cut off, and brakes were cut off,
mentally take a break inside as I wake and sigh
sentences are runons, talking about what I said's soft
momentum simply builds and it heads over cliff
as I fall I affirm that I'd get it right next time
I can hear a voice saying it's your last rhyme
no time to think of anything but "this sucks"
and at this point I'm so loaded I'm fucked
I wonder whether this shit will explode when it's touched
by the hand of God and the burden's off these
shoulder's this soldier's a loner and bones hurt
I roll like those bolders and hold a tight grip
it can't end like this, but I can't accept this!
sick to my stomach, and feelings aren't coming
ripped something from it, soul's cold and so lonely
nothing much there but cold indifference
indignant, I dig it and love that real wicked shit
but anything except this... like I said can't accept it
guess I'll die without a soul and hope it's like before I was born
yes I'll try to doubt this hole and cope just like before
mess I'll fry or float on clouds and do it again
perspective shift is the difference between you and a friend
I crawled towards the light alright became a creature u crushed
like a moth to a flame I never overcame my stupid impulses
what they find they won't even be able to say what the pulse is
first time I ever smiled when I felt that inner peace
of knowing I'd soon be essentially at ease
from the inevitable storm of chaos followed by eventual release
I suppose joined in a different reality is how this was meant to be
funny 'cause you lack comprehension of what this meant to me
another wave of expression in an apprehensive stream
or a demented dream as a mental protest against what you went to see
I know it's overly dramamtic, the whole scene's cinematic
this reaction automatic, end results are tragic
as I woke from that night mare I laughed and reazlied
it only gives me white hairs, breeds wrath and reaks of lies
so that's when I decide to look back and do it right
I wish I never existed but I don't want to lie
underground so I tried a slightly different approach
saved some cash and skydived
stapled a note to my chest addressing the pain
looked out the plane as I prepared to dive
took a breath and a sight, dove and pondered a bit
dosed in midair to hold the poisons inside
removed my shute and the spair
and as I fall through the air I wish I could take it back
the longest ten minutes of my life
by some miracle a tree broke my fall
and as I lay there impaled I see the absurdity
of seeking this fate and slipping into obscurity
dangling hundreds of feet above the ground I puke at some point
there goes the toxins I ingested, maybe soon I'll be joined
I slip as the branch breaks and give everybody handshakes
metaphorically off course as I exit this course
***
I found the body of a male, bones broken and bruised
lieing right outside my campsite, I did the only thing I could do
called certain numbers and now I'm intriguied
to see what he saw, so I listen to the reports
he's in critical condition, someplace in a coma
I was only on a visit from Cali to Arizona
I guess this person figured he was to be a goner
but something had different plans, as he's getting more stable
they found a note with him that read of truths and of fables
it read the following, as best I recall
"yes I'm sick of it all, but it's not what you think
I can't have what I want, so I wanted to slip
I don't want to die, I just don't want to exist
don't blame yourself or anybody else
I'm a grown fucking man, and everything's planned
if any given event shouldn't occur, then it obviously wasn't meant
otherwise it would have, despite how sad the event
"I deeply hurt inside, so I go flirt outside" read that shit on the DV
in the freestylez thread now I'm out of my head
wish I could erase it all, without leaving one trace
don't want anybody else to be seen as bad because of this
but I was so fucking close and I'm sad because of this
a couple times in my life, events I remember
almost had it just right even wack ties all got severed
what led up to this was a combination of factors
as I grow older my heart gets colder and blacker
misery loves my company and it's unevenly distributed
so I listened to some music, hence I have a message
to the media that claims this is the thing that did him in
don't try to perpetuate those stereotypes because music is art
entertainment that's it, this is real life you dig?
and the wide range of human emotions we're all subject to
have been around since time immemorial
I used to want a long life and wish I was immortal
now I seek out that portal, so I can just be at ease
I never consciously knew that I wanted to be loved
I don't want any sympathy and I can't be saved by a hug
and this shovel's getting heavy, the way this grave's being dug
so I'm finally doing it because some things are beyond my control
told myself I could handle it, I guess I was wrong
said look bitch you're blessed and you're strong
and you have all these attributes, for this the rest of 'em long
take a trip or get drunk and maybe listen to songs
fix your shit and keep on, just fucking move on
but remember this is a cummulative effect
and each day's just too long, I can't shake these feelings
cannot take back those shady dealings
or be saved by hatred or humour, nor meditation or scriptures
not even medication or convictions, can't delete the pictures
can't erase that message, or forget what it represented
it all returns to one truth, so without further ado
I'm gonna do what I do, live life your own way
don't fucking question what I say
my truth is subjective, yours is just different
I'm tired of the pain and I'm sick of the ignorance
in my mind sounds a gong, it's time to get gone
never think of me as a failure, just hold me in your memory
and we can keep it the same, maybe meet on the otherside"
***
so what's the deal with this guy, I heard about on the news
I think he's doing alright, making a recovery, right?
maybe I don't know, wait hold up wake up he's inside
