dragonix
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2021
- Messages
- 1,337
I am a pragmatist I would say but a sucky lame dunce of one. I don't hate myself for saying that today it drives me to want to develop as a human being. I'm disgusted w/ the subhuman monster I quickly become on drugs and alcohol doesn't really matter what kind for my compulsion issue I have become more familiar with as I aged. I can see how resisting my own bias is vital to be open enough to ask for help and hear what I need to so I can start to really truly change. Surely my awareness is shitty to boot and how I can resist what I am unaware of right?
To maintain an unbiased blog for me would be highly unlikely I am thinking but I can certainly give it a shot. Feel free to tear into any bias that might rub you wrong.
I hope this is a promise I keep to myself but I have no reason to keep writing these so frequently I just want to start to steer this blog in a different direction than when the crazy train of my thoughts first started rolling down dark stormy mountain tracks haha don't even wanna look at older entries.
What disturbed me about AA recently and this is one of the big reasons I am quitting it is the amount of rude bias in meetings. Only some people would express it including my ex-sponsor to me (for three days) and I am not trying to imply I do not suffer from rude bias in my own head I certainly do.
For example it was said in these last three days in at least two meetings when using drugs was brought up to avoid NA meetings because they try to sell drugs to you right outside the meeting. I went to a NA meeting on Saturday and while the demographic sure was different what the people said in the meeting was of equal importance to what they were saying at AA. They weren't any less of people for doing NA. No drugs were being sold in the parking lot where some gathered after/ it was in a well kept inner city library basement with nicer seats than many AA meetings. What a big biased piece of judgy AA bullshit.
To maintain an unbiased blog for me would be highly unlikely I am thinking but I can certainly give it a shot. Feel free to tear into any bias that might rub you wrong.
I hope this is a promise I keep to myself but I have no reason to keep writing these so frequently I just want to start to steer this blog in a different direction than when the crazy train of my thoughts first started rolling down dark stormy mountain tracks haha don't even wanna look at older entries.
What disturbed me about AA recently and this is one of the big reasons I am quitting it is the amount of rude bias in meetings. Only some people would express it including my ex-sponsor to me (for three days) and I am not trying to imply I do not suffer from rude bias in my own head I certainly do.
For example it was said in these last three days in at least two meetings when using drugs was brought up to avoid NA meetings because they try to sell drugs to you right outside the meeting. I went to a NA meeting on Saturday and while the demographic sure was different what the people said in the meeting was of equal importance to what they were saying at AA. They weren't any less of people for doing NA. No drugs were being sold in the parking lot where some gathered after/ it was in a well kept inner city library basement with nicer seats than many AA meetings. What a big biased piece of judgy AA bullshit.
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