Hey everyone
I want to apologize for sorta disappearing after my first thread. I kinda fell a bit hard when weaning and couldn’t really move. I read a lot of the replies and tried my best to reply to all but I am new to this and lol well my phone can do only so much. This might be an excessive post but I wanted to share something I wrote recently during my weaning. It was when I finally joined bluelight and found others
I’m still in the loop of bulimia and drug addiction. I know it’s killing me but Really could care less. I’m not suicidal I just am numb. I’m at the point of my life where I can’t go on without a replacement.
Until I found out I actually wasn’t alone. I always thought I could handle everything by myself. But I can’t. We can’t. We will always be looking for that next high and entering the next loop of the cycle. But what if we could break it. What if helping each other is the new high that can be replaced. What if we changed our views and to see it as that. In reality the physical high is really a mental one. So if we can replace that doesn’t it mean we are each other’s drugs
I want to apologize for sorta disappearing after my first thread. I kinda fell a bit hard when weaning and couldn’t really move. I read a lot of the replies and tried my best to reply to all but I am new to this and lol well my phone can do only so much. This might be an excessive post but I wanted to share something I wrote recently during my weaning. It was when I finally joined bluelight and found others
I’m still in the loop of bulimia and drug addiction. I know it’s killing me but Really could care less. I’m not suicidal I just am numb. I’m at the point of my life where I can’t go on without a replacement.
Until I found out I actually wasn’t alone. I always thought I could handle everything by myself. But I can’t. We can’t. We will always be looking for that next high and entering the next loop of the cycle. But what if we could break it. What if helping each other is the new high that can be replaced. What if we changed our views and to see it as that. In reality the physical high is really a mental one. So if we can replace that doesn’t it mean we are each other’s drugs