After a long and painful day of the hunt for my DOC (hydrocodone and oxy) which started just like everyone else, I was out of luck. My back throbbed, my hand ached, I was standing behind the counter at the gas station looking at every customer through hate filled eyes because I didn't want to be there and where I live everyone is in such a rush and self entitled assholes. I asked my friend if she knew where I could aquire any of the substance that I desperately needed. Her reply came in no, but I can find the other... meaning heroin.
fuck it. My wife and i are seperated (not a drug issue), i hurt bad, and it was just me at the house. She aquire what was needed and proceeded to teach me how to prepare everything. I had purchased a 20 bag for me, which where I am at is a point 1.
I have never really been a drug user. I took between 20 to 60mg of oxy or hydro depending how I felt for the day. Over the past 6 years I haven't really upped the dose. I don't like to be high because I forget so much, I have 2 daughters, and lead a busy life, but have had moments where I may have taken the extra pill or two. I smoke the occasional joint, but other than that I never considered myself a drug user. I destroyed my body in iraq and in order for me to move around the house and do shit I took pain killers. Until now..
She readied the line for me and I swear it was huge. She just laughed because it's about half of what she does. I explained to her I'll do half of it but I don't want to abuse it. I would rather take less than too much. I have lost many friends due to od.
The devil was there... spread out on the glass. He handed me the straw and told me to put it to my nose and inhale like your nose is running. I followed his instructions willingly. I was scared I was going to sneeze it out. Hell I didn't even know anything went into my nose.
Now what? Where is the relief? I thought this was supposed to feel great.... then the taste came. The taste that I knew so well. Except instead of in my mouth it was in my throat. Then it hit me. I was furious. It had felt as if I took a 10mg oxy. This is it? Is this really what the big bad heroin feels like? All these years condoning this drug, spending all my money on pain pills, and I could have used this and feltexactly the same?
I didn't nod, didn't get crazy... sickness went away, pain was gone, and I could finally get to cleaning my house. All while the devil laughed at me in the corner of the room.
never in a million years would I have thought thus would be me. The guy who runs to the bathroom at work "because his kid got him sick, or ate something funny" when really it's just to do another line.
it has been almost a week. I have spent 60 bucks on the devil. He rides with me in my pocket. If I feel the pains he comes to assist me. If I was on the other stuff I would have easily spent 300$.
Now I'm a wreck. I feel like a failure. A big fucking hypocrit. But nothing has changed with me. Just spend less money for the same relief. I am a logical person. This don't make any sense.
sorry if I broke any rules. There are so many it's hard to realize if any were broken or not. Now please excuse me... the devil is calling me.... fffffffuuuuucccckkkkk.
fuck it. My wife and i are seperated (not a drug issue), i hurt bad, and it was just me at the house. She aquire what was needed and proceeded to teach me how to prepare everything. I had purchased a 20 bag for me, which where I am at is a point 1.
I have never really been a drug user. I took between 20 to 60mg of oxy or hydro depending how I felt for the day. Over the past 6 years I haven't really upped the dose. I don't like to be high because I forget so much, I have 2 daughters, and lead a busy life, but have had moments where I may have taken the extra pill or two. I smoke the occasional joint, but other than that I never considered myself a drug user. I destroyed my body in iraq and in order for me to move around the house and do shit I took pain killers. Until now..
She readied the line for me and I swear it was huge. She just laughed because it's about half of what she does. I explained to her I'll do half of it but I don't want to abuse it. I would rather take less than too much. I have lost many friends due to od.
The devil was there... spread out on the glass. He handed me the straw and told me to put it to my nose and inhale like your nose is running. I followed his instructions willingly. I was scared I was going to sneeze it out. Hell I didn't even know anything went into my nose.
Now what? Where is the relief? I thought this was supposed to feel great.... then the taste came. The taste that I knew so well. Except instead of in my mouth it was in my throat. Then it hit me. I was furious. It had felt as if I took a 10mg oxy. This is it? Is this really what the big bad heroin feels like? All these years condoning this drug, spending all my money on pain pills, and I could have used this and feltexactly the same?
I didn't nod, didn't get crazy... sickness went away, pain was gone, and I could finally get to cleaning my house. All while the devil laughed at me in the corner of the room.
never in a million years would I have thought thus would be me. The guy who runs to the bathroom at work "because his kid got him sick, or ate something funny" when really it's just to do another line.
it has been almost a week. I have spent 60 bucks on the devil. He rides with me in my pocket. If I feel the pains he comes to assist me. If I was on the other stuff I would have easily spent 300$.
Now I'm a wreck. I feel like a failure. A big fucking hypocrit. But nothing has changed with me. Just spend less money for the same relief. I am a logical person. This don't make any sense.
sorry if I broke any rules. There are so many it's hard to realize if any were broken or not. Now please excuse me... the devil is calling me.... fffffffuuuuucccckkkkk.
