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Salvia Divinorum-1st Time-Broken Into Little Pieces

mexican seafood

Bluelighter
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Jan 19, 2005
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We’d been planning a day-trip for some time…

When I say we, I mean myself and a friend called R.
R had recently had his first mushroom experience, and absolutely loved it. He’d also smoked salvia at least once. I’d done mushrooms before, but too low a dose to fully trip. Aside from that, my experience with psychedelics/entheogens was really limited to cannabis…although I’d acquired a fair bit of experience in that area. My experience with dissociatives was also fairly limited; just a couple of DXM trips (although both around the 500mg mark).

Anyway, we drove down to a local-ish spot with a couple of R’s friends, smoking a few bowls on the way. Quite sufficiently stoned, we wandered around smoking cigarettes, looking at head shops and street artists. R and I had decided already that we were going to try and get some salvia, and his friends seemed up for the idea. Eventually me and one of his friends split for a box of 15x, and we returned to R’s van, which was parked in a nice quiet area. Seeing as I’d paid the most, I got the honor of the first bowl, which I packed sufficiently but not extravagantly into a rather exquisite glass bubbler. I knew that if I wanted to break through I had to hit it hard and fast, so I sparked the bic (trademark ;)) and took about as much as I could inhale. I held it in as long as I could without real discomfort, and exhaled smoothly.

That’s when I knew I’d broken through.
I’m sure other salvia devotees will acknowledge just how rapid the come-up is. As the last of the smoke trailed from my mouth, I felt a soaring rush, up and down at the same time. It reminded me vaguely of cannabis, but it had an alien strength and speed. As this feeling came to a climax, I looked up at R sitting in the driver’s seat. Suddenly, my vision shattered into about is nine equal shafts of the same image. Around these snapshots of R and the driver’s seat was only blackness. I consider this the dissociation of salvia. I was propelled into another dimension, the world as I knew it was broken into little, insignificant pieces.

I came “back” from the blackness, but into something else altogether. It was extremely visual. People and parts of the van become roads, trees, terraced streets and houses. I was laughing uncontrollably, but the laughing brought no pleasure, and started to hurt pretty soon, but I couldn’t stop. The visual aspect reminded me of Gumby…it was very much in that style. At this time, as I was looking at the other people in the van, and seeing how they made up streets and buildings and suchlike, I began to see that they were in fact made up of other little things. I felt as though I had been pulled into another dimension of smallness.

This is the hard part to explain…

It was as though I was looking at them at the subatomic level. I could see that they were people, but they were totally unrecognizable as they were made up of millions of tiny facets. I felt as though these facets had some kind of intelligence. I realized that they might be the ones in control…I saw humanity as factories for these creatures to exist in. I couldn’t understand anything my friends were saying. Everything came out as gibberish, some foreign tongue. In between this were periods of drifting through the blackness and seeing some pretty incomprehensible images.

This continued for some time…I would return to being able to see more normally and understand some words for a split second, and then someone would say something completely inhuman, and I would see that I was in fact just in a slightly larger dimension, where we were made up of not so many “facets”. I hated the thought of humans being used like this. I hated the creatures for their single-minded purpose, whatever that really was. I got pretty scared about not being able to get back to the real world, and being stuck in these gibberish dimensions forever. It was at some points much like the part in “Being John Malkovich” when he enters his own tunnel. All my friends could say was the name of this particular dimension of “facet”. I remember trying to tell R this, but I don’t think he had the slightest idea what I was on about ;)

Eventually I must have drifted out of this mindset, and I found myself still tripping, but more controllably, and in waves. This is when the pleasurable part began. I felt at peace, and somewhat enlightened by my experience. I kept reminding myself that the effects would go away when they were ready to, and I kept a good hold on myself this way. I closed my eyes, and had quite beautiful but subtle CEVs “looking” at the sun. We decided to go for a walk at this point, because R’s friends didn’t like the headspace and our uncontrollable laughter was bringing funny looks from a guy working on his car. I tried to reassure them that it’s a drug that they’re feeling and that it dissociates you, but I’m not sure how well this worked. As we walked past houses and gardens, I was amazed by the beauty of nature. I stopped at one garden with a large oak-like tree and a swing and exclaimed just how beautiful the world is. We wandered back towards a beach. R had come down pretty quickly, I’m not sure whether he broke through or not. I bought some hot and delicious handcut chili-cheese fries and we all munched them while making a loop back to the van. The other guys had calmed down a bit now, and everyone was pretty sober by the time we started driving. I felt peaceful still, but slightly sad and introverted. However, we packed a couple of bowls of some lovely sativa on the way back, and everyone was soon smiling again.

If there is one thing I learnt from the experience, it is this: salvia is not like cannabis or other drugs I’ve experienced…it doesn’t go out of its way to give you anything. Generally, no matter what the situation, a joint or two will always bring me up. Salvia shows you things you never even had nightmares about, but it can also show you beauty and wonder. It feels as though it has its own agenda, and you are just along for the ride. If you can handle this, it is extremely rewarding.

The hard part is, it throws you in at the deep end.
 
Interesting assessment. You may want to consider these subatomic facets of humanity. Was it just humanity made up of these or everything? Were these facets in fact using humanity as a factory, or simply existing within us? Why hate them? It is what it is. You should consider how much of your interpretation is based on your ego's defenses.

My take: within every particle lies the infinity of creation. What you saw was a breaking down of the elements of our iteration of the universe into separate iterations of the universe, each facet being an entire existence in itself. You felt a consciousness because the common thread of universal consciousness runs through everything. You experienced infinity in a unique way.

You might also consider attempting to enter and explore one of thse facets. You may find yourself in a strange land, dimensions away from our own, but no less strange in its own right. Just subjectively more strange.
 
I really enjoyed that, well written indeed!

I'm glad you took so much out of it!
 
thanks malarkey, again, so am i ;)

Xorkoth said:
Interesting assessment. You may want to consider these subatomic facets of humanity. Was it just humanity made up of these or everything? Were these facets in fact using humanity as a factory, or simply existing within us? Why hate them? It is what it is. You should consider how much of your interpretation is based on your ego's defenses.

My take: within every particle lies the infinity of creation. What you saw was a breaking down of the elements of our iteration of the universe into separate iterations of the universe, each facet being an entire existence in itself. You felt a consciousness because the common thread of universal consciousness runs through everything. You experienced infinity in a unique way.

You might also consider attempting to enter and explore one of thse facets. You may find yourself in a strange land, dimensions away from our own, but no less strange in its own right. Just subjectively more strange.

you raise some interesting questions and concepts. :)

to attempt to answer some of your queries, i believe it was just humanity that was made up of the facets, but it may have been otherwise...i was fairly focused in the other people in the van.
the facets were existing within us, but there was a feeling...a primitive defense mechanism perhaps...that was telling me they were a threat. it was this that made me hate them during the experience.

after the experience, i have had no ill-feelings towards these "facets". i'm intruiged by them, in fact. i believe they illustrate the one-ness of the universe. everything is, at it's lowest level, the same as everything else, and distinguished by mind alone. as a buddhist i found the experience a confirmation of the teachings i have read on this subject.

i really like your explanation of "the infinity of creation". it's an ancient belief, pioneered by the Hua-yen buddhists, that within each speck of dust, and each particle of matter in the universe exists another universe.

also, i hadn't really thought of further exploring the dimensions...i think that might prove to be the perfect way to approach my second journey. that sort of "letting go" rather than fighting it could be very rewarding.
 
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