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Running away from your problems

B

Beat Narrative

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 19, 2011
Messages
306
Location
Melbourne
people always tell me running away from your probles is a bad idea, i don't persnally think thats the case

I am in an 8 year relationship that looks like it may be coming to end , i am enroled in a course i really love but the idea of being anywhere close to my gf without us being in a relationship seems impossible for me

Its my fault the relationship is ending, due to my inability to function without drugs and alcohol, i know this issue needs to be addressd but i think my gf is just at the end of her patience with me

my plan at this point is to give my gf enough money to cover my half of our rent until our lease ends in december and just fuck off to india then sth east asia until the end of the year

doing this could be a really big mistake as i felt i was doing well and feeling stimulated doing my course but if my relationship ends i would really want to be somewhere chaotic where no one knows me and i can just kinda wander around by myself

the idea is liberating and depressing at the same time
 
Sounds pretty depressing to me. Why is finishing school (I assume that's what you mean when you say course, but please correct me if I'm wrong) contingent upon being with her? I say if you find it stimulating then finish it.
 
I've been running away for years. I recently realized I gotta face them, and so far, it's scary but i'm doing it. :/
 
Missykins said:
Sounds pretty depressing to me. Why is finishing school (I assume that's what you mean when you say course, but please correct me if I'm wrong) contingent upon being with her? I say if you find it stimulating then finish it.
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well by course i mean university , it is contingent on the fact that to continue course i have to remain on the same continent as my otherwsise and likely to get even more so depressing life
 
<3That doesn't sound like running away at all. That sounds like a proactive life change to me. School can be picked up and put down and picked up again. Life is hopefully long. The only problems I wouldn't suggest running away from are the drug and alcohol problems--they make my last sentence less likely to be true.<3
 
Beat Narrative said:
i would really want to be somewhere chaotic where no one knows me and i can just kinda wander around by myself

the idea is liberating and depressing at the same time
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May I suggest the wonderful coast of Somalia, in between dodging mortar rounds and running from pirates, you can do your best to avoid easily treated and preventable but none the less lethal infections!

Nyah, stay in school, you'll thank yourself.
 
8 years, damn. I am suicidal after after a one year breakup. It's going to take a long time to get over this person. Drugs and alcohol are what I use, but I hear from people it isn't the best method of counselling. I have been running away from people and problems ever since I was a wee little boi; because that's what my mother does to, and she would take me along too.
I still run. I can't stay rooted in one place for very long, I get an incredible wanderlust and I want to leave anyone. I like the wild too.

I don't know what you should do.
but good luck!
running does solve problems sometimes, in our "fight or flight" defence mechanism to the people and places around us.
 
If you don't like the course you're taking, then feel free to leave.
 
webbykevin said:
Go to India, just do it !
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i love india, no other place makes you realise your insignificance on the planet and the fact your just an organism thats playing mother earths game more than india, the 6 month visa thing with a 2 month prohibtion of re-entry is my biggest problem, otherwise i would live there
 
Are you really running away from your problems? It's unlikely whatever's behind your drug issues is going to magically disappear just because you're somewhere else and that's your real problem. A change of scenery can do wonders for one's mindset, but just be aware that it's not going to solve that issue and it tends to follow you around unless you address it.
 
well i am running away from my problems in the sense that i lack the emotional maturity to carry on life despite a change in circumstance

my substance abuse issues certainly will not get resolved in the third world, pharmacies are like candy stores

so one problem will be ever present i guess
 
Only run away from your problems if they won't chase you.

It sounds like your relationship is coming to an end because your girlfriend is sick of you using drugs because you're probably all anxious and emotionally immature and don't want to lose your girlfriend, so you use drugs but that makes your girlfriend respect you less and become more and more sick of you using drugs, which really makes you anxious and upset, and with your emotional immaturity, you have to cover it up with drugs and alcohol, but then again, that leads your girlfriend to end up more angry and less respectful of you and you end up knowing that, but because of your insecurity and emotional immaturity and anxiety, you drink and take drugs because you need them to face your girlfriend, even though she'll be angry and upset and tired of you using drink and drugs as an excuse not to grow up, but you don't know how to grow up (who does?) and so you use drugs and drink just to be confident enough to see her, but this leads her to get more and more upset about it to the point where she--I'll stop here.

Look, man. Join a methadone programme or some sort of substance-abuse help thingy, then have great make-up sex and be sure to fuck her senseless and enjoy your new life where you're able to get free drugs daily, continue your studies and regain the respect and love of your girlfriend because you've made a positive change to your life.

What drugs are you using?

Props to rangrz for that delightful post. It's nice to have a girlfriend for so long, but maybe it'd be best if you just tried listening to her advice and making sure to somehow keep her (if you love her) and thusly sort out your drug issues. It's sad to lose them, but you'll be able to use occasionally - I'm sure! Plus it's more fun when you do get to use drugs occasionally, rather than constantly.

Moving continents because of emotional pain sounds like the sort of thing I'd do, were I not chained about the neck with fatal disease and so unable to leave my sterile bubble for more than 24 minutes each day. Still, whoever said 'don't quit school if you like it just to avoid a painful breakup. You'll do nothing but think about her wherever you are.' is some sort of genius (and you're beautiful, too, Missykins, I can see you love this forum and to help save people, it's so noble I'm weeping right now as I stroke myself, teehee!) and, of course, they're 100% right. Really. You'll spend the trip getting over her with casual sex and drug abuse and all sorts of other sorts of abuse, but in the end you'll have a hole in your heart that will always be there, whether it's a fresh wound or just scar tissue resulting from the beginning of your next relationship, where you're nursed back to health by an Indian family with a pretty daughter who once caught you bathing and blushed and ran away, but will sneak love poems to you as you lie awake in bed and shall eventually find herself unable to hide from her feelings and allow you free reign over her virginal body, goosebumps popping up over her delicious-looking dark, dark skin as you lower your lips to her, and oh--I should probably stop talking.

Well, Indian women are beautiful and they know how to take care of a guy and a house and pretty much anything, which is fantastic. So, maybe just pre-emptively avoid this break-up by leaving your girl and heading off to India to find a native who'll nurse you and fall in love with you...

(I apologise, but they gave me so many pain-killers when I was stabbed and so there're a few left over)

Good luck, but as I said, only run from problems that won't chase you! This one will... :C
Love to you. <3
 
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