Your doctor is a dumbass just like 90% of the doctors I've been to. The doctor I'm seeing now the first day I saw him I told him I wanted 100% control over my taper and if he wasn't willing to do that I'd find another doctor who would.
If I ever had a dr tell me "you should be over wds" I'd probably want to punch him in the face. I just can't stand doctors sorry for the negativity.
Loperamide will delay wds but only the physical aspect of them. Your brain will still heal but your body won't heal as fast. I'd take the lope myself if I was on the verge of a relapse and it was just that bad. Not sleeping for 20 days will turn you into a horrible horrible person. It will seriously fuck with your head like I'm sure you're already noticing.
As an addict just remember you DO NOT deserve any of this shit. You need to hammer that into your brain. No addicts have any idea how awful wds are untill the first time they go through them. It will rock your world.
If you're having RLS really bad, make sure you are eating as much as you possibly can. During wds I NEVER wanted to eat, and that will magnify and make the wd process that much longer. Its traumatic enough for your brain/body to be deprived of something as potent as methadone, and if its being deprived of food too it just compounds everything so much worse. The lack of sleep is like the icing on the cake, I know its a nightmare just try to deal with it as much as you can because IT WILL get better, and when it DOES, you're going to cry thats how happy you'll be.
RLS is the one symptom that always was the worse for me. You can be over 95% of the wds, but still have that 1 symptom stick around for a long time. I would honestly give it another 10 days and I guarantee you things will improve. As far as sleep meds there is a way addicts get them very easily (w/out seeing a doctor OR dealer) but I'm not allowed to talk about it on here as it would be sourcing. You can also try experimenting with DXM or robotussin as I think it has a fairly long half life.
If you want to play with loperamide and take it just once, you can try out 4-6mg and see if it helps you. Sometimes you need a "vacation" from wds to recoup and recharge your battery so to speak, and when you stop taking the loperamide you'll be in a better mindset and will be able to push the envelope a little further.
Exercise also obviously helps (especially running for RLS) but its damn near impossible during this phase you're in right now so don't stress about it.
Definitely stress about EATING though, I really can't emphasize it enough. Getting 3-4 large servings of vegetables and protein has worked miracles for me before in wds. Here is one last tip and I can explain the chemistry why, but it would take too long. STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM SUGAR OR SIMPLE CARBS during wds. Anything that spikes your blood sugar, will spike your cortisol, then hours later when your cortisol drops, adrenaline fires off to compensate.
THIS WILL MAKE YOUR RLS A LOT WORSE! Trust me as I made that mistake too and when I took sugar/simple carbs out I felt a lot calmer.
Anyway, KEEP AT IT! Do not give up as you've made it REALLY far and you NEED to be PROUD of yourself more than anything. As hard as it will be, and as gay as this sounds, look in the mirror and smile and tell yourself "I rock", because you do. You're making one of the hardest decisions of your life, and you WILL love yourself if you can just fight through this bullshit.
Take care! - Bo
The worse is it is keeping me from sleeping more then a 2 to 3 hours a night. Is this still normal 19 days out? When will it end and is there anything I can try to make it stop!! Could it be caused by something else my pain killers were hiding? (I was on pain killers for a foot injury for 4 yrs) I'm scared to death this is something else but really dont' know since this is my first detox from pain meds.
yeah if only I could go back. You have not only helped me but my family aswell they are scared for me because were all in unknown territory and not sure what symptoms are or if it's something else going on. I've learned alot and when I get through this maybe I can help others. Thank You