Reminder from my friend

I've been thinking a lot about my dog that passed away a little over a year ago. I've been feeling strong feelings of loss, sadness and, well... I just plain old miss him.

I woke up early today, showered and pulled a shirt out of a dry cleaning bag (its been a LONG time since I had this shirt dry cleaned). I drove about three hours intermittently with the windows down and sunroof open.

I hugged about 7 people and moved around quite a bit.

So? Well, I went to a meeting tonight and the topic was on Death from the Just For Today book:

NSFW:

August 20, 2011

Facing death

Page 242

"Often we have to face some type of crisis during our recovery, such as the death of a loved one..."

Basic Text, p. 102

Every life has a beginning and an end. However, when someone we love a great deal reaches the end of their life, we may have a very hard time accepting their sudden, final absence. Our grief may be so powerful that we fear it will completely overwhelm us - but it will not. Our sorrow may hurt more than anything we can remember, but it will pass.

We need not run from the emotions that may arise from the death of a loved one. Death and grieving are parts of the fullness of living "life on life's terms." By allowing ourselves the freedom to experience these feelings, we partake more deeply of both our recovery and our human nature.

Sometimes the reality of another's death makes our own mortality that much more pronounced. We reevaluate our priorities, appreciating the loved ones still with us all the more. Our life, and our life with them, will not go on forever. We want to make the most of what's most important while it lasts.

We might find that the death of someone we love helps strengthen our conscious contact with our Higher Power. If we remember that we can always turn to that source of strength when we are troubled, we will be able to stay focused on it no matter what may be going on around us.

Just for Today: I will accept the loss of one I love and turn to my Higher Power for the strength to accept my feelings. I will make the most of my love for those in my life today.

Copyright (c) 2010, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

After the reading, I look down on my shirt and find a kinky strand of my dog's hair.

Thanks for looking out for me, Shaman. I needed that.

 

aww

 

I had my cat die about then, shed been around for 14 years but battled breast cancer. It came back like crazy and eventually split open her skin and wreaked. All she wanted was to be comforted but she smelled so awful. She spent her last weeks lying on my bed just purring for a little respite from the pain. When she refused to drink and eat and entered a malaise we took her to the vet and gave her the only thing we knew would help.

We buried her in a flower garden, which is probably illegal. But she'll get to be flowers and bloom once more and bask in the sun she so loved.

I basically havent thought about her since I read you post. Do you have another dog yet?

 

But she'll get to be flowers and bloom once more and bask in the sun she so loved.

this made me feel warm inside. That bond between such friends is deep and strong. I completely feel ya.

No dog yet. I still don't feel ready. I want to establish some balance and routine first before committing to a new friend like that in my life

It'll happen, though... just not yet

 

I don't like obligations. I felt like being the oldest I was always obligated to take care of something or someone. My drivers license which I thought would be freedom made me the child chauffeur and gofer. Pets require an unselfishness I'm just not ready to give up.

You'll get another when you're ready. It sounds like you want one.

BTW thats a hell of a bone pillow.