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Relationship Vultures

BlueHues

BlueHues

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 18, 2012
Messages
4,393
Location
The Midwest
Okay, so as I've posted on other threads...my longtime GF just broke with me...we've been struggling for awhile but I didn't see it coming...

She's been hanging out with a few different dudes here and there, but I trust her...she's really not the type to sneak around at all, she's honest to a fault...

Well, the last few days she's always in the other room chatting or texting or on the phone and she has no GFs really, she gets along better with men...

A week ago, a few of her old high-school friends came over here and we hung out and got high. One of them was cool. but the other one was this little douchebag "know it all" type guy who kept making passive agressive little comments to me, designed to make me look bad in front of my girlfriend. I ignored it at the time, but part of me just wanted to knock him the fuck out! And by "know it all", I mean he was trying to challenge everything I said and act like he knew "what he was talking about"...Of course, I'm 8 years his senior and have lived all over this country and experienced a large spectrum of shit in my life....He's never left this shithole or really done shit other than be a little parasite! For some reason, my ex GF considers him her "friend"!

I kind of had a sense that my girlfriend was talking with him the day after and that he was talking shit about me, but I didn't say anything....We share a phone right now and yesterday I found a message from him telling my GF "You deserve so much better than that guy!" and talking shit!

this dude liked her in highschool and she rejected him, and now he's trying to take advantage of the fact that we're struggling and try to get in my girlfriends pants!

I told her, "I'll just fuck this dude up, I don't care the consequences!"....She got angry at me and told me not to be jealous...But this kind of sneakiness needs to be dealt with swiftly, I feel! If she was just hanging out with this dude and he was acting like a normal person, even IF he had ulterior motives, I wouldnt have cared...the fact is, he's actively trying to make our breakup stick and thats whats pissing me off!

I let this dude come here and hang out with us, and he's being a sneaky, pathetic, backstabbing little worm! I really wanna just teavh him a lesson!

Category for category, this dude just doesnt compare to me on any level! Hes very insecure...maybe thats why hes trying to do this shit!

Of course, there's five other guys trying to hit on my girlfriend, but only this dude is resorting to bad mouthing me and trying to take advantage of a bad situation and THIS is what's bringing out my rage!....She broke up with me and I'm not trying to tell her who she can hang out with, but I have a raging hardon for this guy!

I'm not some big testosterone muscle dude...I'm a musician who like to be chill(5'11 175 lbs)..but I will kick your ass when necessary!!!

Should I confront this dude? at least verbally? Am I out of line here?!
 
BlueHues said:
Okay, so as I've posted on other threads...my longtime GF just broke with me...we've been struggling for awhile but I didn't see it coming...

She's been hanging out with a few different dudes here and there, but I trust her...she's really not the type to sneak around at all, she's honest to a fault...

Well, the last few days she's always in the other room chatting or texting or on the phone and she has no GFs really, she gets along better with men...

A week ago, a few of her old high-school friends came over here and we hung out and got high. One of them was cool. but the other one was this little douchebag "know it all" type guy who kept making passive agressive little comments to me designed to make me look bad in front of my girlfriend. I ignored it at the time, but part of me just wanted to knock him the fuck out! And by "know it all", I mean he was trying to challenge everything I said and act like he knew "what he was talking about"...Of course, I'm 8 years his senior and have lived all over this country and experienced a large spectrum of shit in my life....He's never left this shithole

I kind of had a sense that my girlfriend was talking with him the day after and that he was talking shit about me, but I didn't say anything....We share a phone right now and yesterday I found a message from him telling my GF "You deserve so much better than that guy!" and talking shit!

this dude liked her in highschool and she rejected him, and now he's trying to take advantage of the fact that we're struggling and try to get in my girlfriends pants!

I told her, "I'll just fuck this dude up, I don't care the consequences!"....She got angry at me and told me not to be jealous...But this kind of sneakiness needs to be dealt with swiftly, I feel! If she was just hanging out with this dude and he was acting like a normal person, even IF he had ulterior motives, I wouldnt have cared...the fact is, he's actively trying to make our breakup stick and thats whats pissing me off!

I let this dude come here and hang out with us, and he's being a sneaky, pathetic, backstabbing little worm! I really wanna just teavh him a lesson!

Category for category, this dude just doesnt compare to me on any level! Hes very insecure...maybe thats why hes trying to do this shit!

Of course, there's five other guys trying to hit on my girlfriend, but only this dude is resorting bad mouthing me and trying to take advantage of a bad situation....She broke up with me and I'm not trying to tell her who she can hang out with, but I have a raging hardon for this guy!

I'm not some big testosterone muscle dude...I'm a musician who like to be chill..but I will kick your ass when necessary!!!

Should I confront this dude? at least verbally? Am I out of line here?!
Click to expand...

I wouldnt just more fuel for the fire, IF u want to get back with herr.
But if u dont wanna get back with her *no advocating violence*
 
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What would any sort of "victory" look like here?

Violence? Really?

That's for the birds man.

fuck the shit out of him. break his hands, jaw and dick. Problem solved.
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Problem solved how? Use your vital energy to get away in a cool way. Don't be an animal.
 
^I know...and I'm not a violent person...I have been in a few altercations in my life, but I never look for violence! I just feel like I should do something here! Maybe not...
 
So your GF left you & is now putting it about with other blokes to rub your face in it? Seems like she is a cunt & you are well rid of her mate.

You could confront this punk & it is your life so just think about the potential consequences of any action taken though. I am an advocate for violence where appropriate but this is not an appropriate case.
 
violence isn't the solution no matter what the situation and i cannot condone it. you could end up with a criminal record and its hard to get a job in that case

it seems to me like you need to stop sharing a phone and if you want to be away from all her potential suitors then move on and get a place somewhere else. away from her. or prepare to be enraged over and over.

you mentioned in another thread about being bipolar (correct me if i am wrong). are you in a manic episode? (stress can be a big trigger) sometimes you can tell, and one thing i find is that the level of aggression when i am like that is off the scale and not proportional to the situation. don't do something you regret
 
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I understand how incredibly difficult this situation must be for you as 6 years is a very long time but you really, really need to get yourself under control. Do NOT beat up this guy! From an outside point of view this sounds like quite an overreaction, which I can't blame you for but please don't act on it.
The fact of the matter is she did break up with you and it's going to be very difficult for you if she starts to see someone else of course, but she's 'free' to do it now as other guys are free to express interest in her. Also if this guy is a friend of her's it's normal if he's bad-mouthing you now that you aren't together...I mean if one of my friends and their partner break-up I'm definitely going to spend the whole time insulting the ex to make my friend feel better - especially if I didn't even like the ex in the first place, as is the case in your situation. Everyone does that.
If you beat this guy up I'm pretty sure your ex will never want to get back with you again. You will definitely regret it.
Try to create some distance with what's going on in her life now and if you want there to be any chance for the two of you to work again, just try to be as great to her as you can right now regardless of who she's talking to or whatever.
Beating guys up won't get her back.
 
Thank you for the support guys, It would take a lot of effort to track this guy down and beat him up, and I've since calmed down and I'm just lettin it go, what can I do? She's just bored with her life, we've been in a rut for awhile, but we've been close the whole time and definitely loving towards each other....

The thing I should point out, which may wildly change the complexion of this thread is that we were on Heroin for almost 4 years on the east coast! I worked the entire time and ended up getting fired due to that...Shortly after that, I went to rehab and she came out here...I was in rehab for 4 months and I didn't talk to her for the first 2 months. She was really excited when I came out here and we started living together again....It's been a year out here now

We didn't have our car anymore, and we haven't had one since...I can't find a job mostly because I don't have a car to go look for one, but she works literally a five minute walk from here....This city is so spread out and we live on the outskirts...The only way for her to get to where anything is going on is to get picked up, and pretty much all her old friends are guys!

I've been really depressed since the summer and things have been incredibly boring and lifeless for us....Neither of us can take it anymore and she just has really started to resent me.....I dont really blame her in a way, but I feel we still love each other and I don't really think it's me it's just what are lives have became....Maybe I sound like a lazy piece of shit here and it would be easy to pick on me, but this is a tough spot I'm in, and this is a hard time to find a job! I recently started talking with my family and they're willing to loan me the money for a car so that should help, but she just doesn't want to hear it anymore...So, I really can't do shit

Going and hanging out with people is the only thing keeping her sane, but she seems oblivious to the fact that it's dudes trying to fuck her that are the ones that wanna hang out! Of course, I don't know anyone here, have no money, no job, no car, Im pretty much up shits creek all alone!

I just have to really somehow get my life straightened out but going through this is making it even harder than it already was!
pofacedhoe said:
you mentioned in another thread about being bipolar (correct me if i am wrong). are you in a manic episode? (stress can be a big trigger) sometimes you can tell, and one thing i find is that the level of aggression when i am like that is off the scale and not proportional to the situation. don't do something you regret
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Yeah, I'm not manic yet, but pacing around this little place and thinking all the time is starting to give me moments where I feel like I'm startin to go crazy....I've gone WAY manic a few times and I'm afraid this could be the thing that really sends me over the edge!
 
You should drop it and try to explain to your girlfriend how this is beyond jealousy. I mean the guy is basically telling her you're a piece. Why would she want to hang out with someone who talks shit on her boyfriend?
 
I was being sarcastic jeez.

Theres no point in beating the dude up. It'll just make things worse esp if u live together.
 
well i have known some pretty violent people so you never know.

about the mania i'm sure you will cope with this if you can get a job. it will take your mind off things and maybe you can put your focus into this so you can escape.

also if you two were on heroin for four years and then you come off it no wonder the dynamic has changed. and probably not for the better.

sort yourself out first and focus on regaining your independence by getting a job- this will only happen by applying to jobs relentlessly
 
rangrz said:
Are you a pouch of powder that's been stirred with hot water and.sat in the fridge.for 3 hours until firm?

Cause you more jelly than jello.
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Is this supposed to be an insult or advice? And do I have a choice between jelly and jello? If so, I choose jelly, jello is made from gelatin, which is basically boiled horse hooves! lol
 
^honestly i dont know:\

either way refrain from anything that could harm your future employability cos gettin a job is hard and its what you need to get really quickly to distract and mobilise yourself from this backwards situation
 
Trying to push the 'other guy' out of the picture with emotional support and a shitty attitude is a total beta move. An alpha male ignores the current guy and keeps his eyes on the prize. You never badmouth the other guy and you never try to sell yourself as the nicer guy. Now I'm not saying you have nothing to worry about in general, but I think with this guy you are ultimately safe. Your woman is just using him for an emotional crutch.
 
What is throwing shit across the room when you get text messages with sexual innuendo on them addressed to your girlfriend, cuz that's what happened tonight! Alpha, Beta or psycho?!

I've never hit my girlfriend, but I'm a big fan of breaking things when I'm emotional! I suppose I could get arrested for it, but isn't that kind of normal....
 
Cyc said:
Trying to push the 'other guy' out of the picture with emotional support and a shitty attitude is a total beta move. An alpha male ignores the current guy and keeps his eyes on the prize. You never badmouth the other guy and you never try to sell yourself as the nicer guy. Now I'm not saying you have nothing to worry about in general, but I think with this guy you are ultimately safe. Your woman is just using him for an emotional crutch.
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thanks man, yeah this thread is outdated because she's currently being courted by every douchebag in midwest right now! I could go out and find plenty of cute girls as a "counter-move", but why would I do that?! why should I have to do that with a girl who's practically my common law wife?

I think I fucked up showing too much emotion tonight, I shouldve blown it off, but I was drunk and I'm generally more inclined to express my displeasure while in that state. I'm thinking I might have to move on, as painful as that is!
 
BlueHues said:
Is this supposed to be an insult or advice? And do I have a choice between jelly and jello? If so, I choose jelly, jello is made from gelatin, which is basically boiled horse hooves! lol
Click to expand...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTclYDFOxNo

2:17

yea he's talking shit saying your jealous lol

But straight up, fuck that little twerp that is trying to fuck your girl, I'm a nice guy as well but sometimes I snap and that would be one of those times for sure, but from my experience with women they hate nothing more than being told what to do, being told who they can hang out with or u being jealous of the person they hanging out with, best thing I think you can do is figure out what you've fucked up on with your girl and fix that, also don't show any jealousy or anger towards that guy or any guy she sees and just be the alpha male show confidence and don't let these guys with primitive skills fuck with ya head
 
who's car we taking bluehues?? I'm in the same boat with ya my dude. *pulls ski mask on*
 
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