Well I got high today and got trash fever or something. I have been throwing up and had a low grade fever since the shot and just generally felt like shit. I just hope its not endocarditis or some shit. I dunno I might be done with heroin my relapses have been farther and farther apart and seem to crave less and less. I started craving dope after rereading Trainspotting that made me start thinking about it then I saw this documentary on current tv about people doing heroin and the heroin trade and they showed this dude shoot up and it was like something clicked and I was like I am going to get high. The thing is its never as good as I remember it being maybe being on suboxone so long has fucked my receptors up or something I dunno. I dont wanna do heroin anymore I just hope I survive this mistake. Does anyone know anything about endocarditis I have been on pub med but I had to stop after I yhad a panic attack. I used a clean rig but I dunno how long the bottle of water I used had been opened it may have been a few weeks old and the cotton I used was definatly not sterile. God I am a fucking idiot.
I fucking deserve to die its like I know better later but when I got dope in my hand its like I dont give a fuck about good technique or anything but geting it in my arm as quickly as possible
I fucking deserve to die its like I know better later but when I got dope in my hand its like I dont give a fuck about good technique or anything but geting it in my arm as quickly as possible