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Regional Heroin Discussion v. Sweet Sixteen (v16)

xaneax dont seem to work on me - most other benzos do but not that for some reason.

btw to the op 20mgs is not a hit 200mgs is (.2 of a g)
 
Hi all, hope everyone is keeping happy, healthy and high - the latter is optional of course. At this stage I've been on methadone about 7 months and when I was at the clinic on friday I looked at the sheet that shows my urine results and there was 27 x's under the heroin section from the day I started, which means not even one clean urine yet.

My doc wants to put me up by another 5 r 10mls from 55mls. She said that by upping me it should block the remainder of the receptors in my brain and will stop me from smoking.
She told me to take the week to think about it.
Now I'm all for any ideas to help me stop smoking altogether but because I don't think methadone is a good idea in general I don't know what to do.
I'm contemplating giving it a go for a couple of weeks and dropping again if it doesn't work.
Out of the 10 r 12 people who go to the clinic - every week the numbers are rising though - only one of them gives clean urines, so the stats at my clinic speak for themselves that methadone is no solution.
I guess really I'm looking for a bit of advice about this. Ultimately it's down to me to stop as i'm not sick and have to spend a fortune if I wanna get anyway stoned and then I feel like crap for wasting money and letting myself down again. So it's not about getting stoned for me, I assume it's just the habit of the last 13 r 14 years.
Any advice would be appreciated, thanks : )

Yeah Alfo its hard to stop using. I was on 40mls for years & i used on top of it all the time. Then i went up to 60mls hoping it would stop the cravings, but it didn't. I just don't want to go any higher the 60mls.......
 
Its clinically proven that a dose of 80-120 is needed to block all receptors and so reduce cravings the doc's know this but they contiually underdose people in the UK it makes no sense. I would have thought ideally you start on a dose of say 100mls or what ever the dose is that stops your cravings and then titrate down when your ready- its relativly easy to drop from 100- 60 even 60 -20 is very doable.
 
thats possibly true, though being on anything over 80mls daily would concern me. at the end of the day if youre going to use you will use, subutex would be a better bet being a partial blocker in any dose. in my experience one needs to flick that switch in the brain that affects a life change and use methadone simply to stop worst of the wd's. having suffered at the hands of 'lost' maintenance confirmations courtesy of HMP service, i must counsel for reliance on high doses of methadone to be treated with caution. as i said, not getting high does not equal not trying
 
My Doctor has always said that if i need to up my dose then i can, but i really don't wanna go above the 60mls. I feel that a lot of the reason that i use heroin at this stage is coz its become a habit. I have been using heroin through-out this 2 years drought & the gear is so weak that i hardly ever get stoned & yet i still keep handing money over to dealers for gear that i know is weak. Well i have cut back BIG time in the last two years, but i'm still using. If the weak gear doesn't stop me then i don't know what will???

At this stage i think the only way i would stop using would be if i got a brain transplant & knowing my luck i'd probably get the brain of another addict! 8(

Dublin Update.....

I got an 8th in D24 on Friday, it was the weirdest looking gear, it was dark grey & it came in one solid rock hard lump, i had to use a knife to cut through it, it was as hard as a lump of hash!!! The gear burned perfect on the foil, it looked perfect & it held off my W.D's very well as i didn't take any methadone over the weekend, but there was little or no stone off it.

I scored again this morning in D12, this was the expensive stuff, its €25 for a small bag with no discount when you buy 6 bags :( Its a light tan colour & its in powder form, it really sticks to you teeth when you smoke it! The gear is much better but its still far from Pre-drought, & the price is crazy!!! For an extra €50 i could have got an 8th of the gear that i'd got on Friday. I always said that i'd pick quality over quantity, but neither batches are pre-drought, the expensive batch is just 'ok to good' its not amazing or anything. So its hard to decide which batch to get? Well after to-day i'll be taking my 10 day break till after I go to the clinic again! I should just cop to hell on & take a permanent break from the crappy Irish gear......
 
I got an 8th in D24 on Friday, it was the weirdest looking gear, it was dark grey & it came in one solid rock hard lump, i had to use a knife to cut through it, it was as hard as a lump of hash!!! The gear burned perfect on the foil, it looked perfect & it held off my W.D's very well as i didn't take any methadone over the weekend, but there was little or no stone off it.

I got stuff like that once before, about two months ago, only it was very dark brown. I thought I had been ripped off but when I tested it on the foil it turned out to be the strongest gear I've ever had. It's a pity I only had 20 euro on me that day so I could only get one bag. I've been trying to find similar stuff ever since but I've had no luck so far!
 
I just had some local kit top dollar . .4 £30 . It's as nice as their is round here could have got double for the same price but it woulda been shite.
 
I feel the same ructions.

At least most people around here readily admit to the product being weak as piss.

The good dealers have packed it in altogether.
Guess it's not worth tarnishing your name with whatever it is people are selling under the guise of heroin.
 
Afternoon all...

1st of the month, and the first day of my current kick. I have a 180euro fucking debt to clear now this afternoon, running around the northside paying off dealers...all in withdrawals. No more of this crap any more. Done with being broke 24/7, running around in rags, not being able to work or leave the country...fuck this lifestyle.

I bought two weak as shite bags last night, took 20mgs of valium and drank 2 bottles of wine...I still felt miserable as hell. Its just not working anymore. What I do have though, is 20mgs of valium a day over a two week period. Necked 10mgs when I woke up, just necked another 30mgs.

I spoke to a friend of mine I'm hoping to visit in about a months time - she kicked methadone a month ago, and its been 34 days since she used anything - weed, alcohol, benzos - and she feels fantastic. I want that feeling. I want to know I can be a likeable person without having to be under the influence of something...anything.

The worst is, I lied to this girl and said I've been sober a while now and that I'm feeling good enough to visit her as soon as I have the cash. A straight up fucking lie, I feel like crap. What frightens me is how long its going to take me to feel normal again...if anyone can shed any light on that, that'd be great. I'll consult the darkside anyway on that one.

I have evervesent solpodine so I'll use them and the valium, but no more than 20mgs daily after this. 10mgs in morning with the codeine, 10mgs at night before bed to aid sleep.

Here we go, day fucking one. Wish me luck please...
 
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Good to see you about Endless my old china .
I'll wish you luck but we both know it's not about luck . It's about getting the right support & loads of other factors but you new that anyway !!

All the best mate .
 
Allow eight weeks for every year of physical dependency for the lethargy and depression to pass and your 'natural energy' to return. Just watch tv or go for long walks; take it very slow and don't expect to do anything during this period of weakness except get through it. After that, it's up to you to find your niche in life.

Like brimz says, you make your luck - but good luck anyway.
 
Brimz and Charle, thank you all.

I was just offerd a half 8th when I paid off my debt - refused it. Didnt even have to think twice about it. I think as long as I can use the benzos for anxiety and sleep and then write during the day, I should be ok. I've been getting very into The Golden Dawn lately, and am considering joining the Irish Chapter - so that should keep me occupied.

But this is it, at least for a long time. I'll never be happy like this.
 
Another feature of the 'weakness' period is coming up with all kind of ideas about what you're going to be. A surprising number, for example, fancy themselves as future social workers. Best not to commit to anything until your strength returns.
 
good advice charlie. endless (nirvana ref?).. do you intend on something romantic happening with said girl? id be truthful with her, or semi truthful - say youve had a blip but am determined to stick on the straight and narrow and does she have any advice she could give you. touch them 'motherly conservation' buttons and youll probably have her support no matter what. dont get caught in an 'im clean' act to loved ones esp partners, ive been there and it becomes a ten ton weight on your shoulders. valium is good, so is a bit of weed and music (60's, beatles or delta blues for myself) but the fact youve already turned down gear (be it shit or not) is a really positive sign. just keep thinking about that feeling when youve hit up and still feel barely well enough to lie still on a sofa.. or of what you could indulge yourself with with all the spare money youll have around. wish you every success, good luck
 
good advice charlie. endless (nirvana ref?).. do you intend on something romantic happening with said girl? id be truthful with her, or semi truthful - say youve had a blip but am determined to stick on the straight and narrow and does she have any advice she could give you. touch them 'motherly conservation' buttons and youll probably have her support no matter what. dont get caught in an 'im clean' act to loved ones esp partners, ive been there and it becomes a ten ton weight on your shoulders. valium is good, so is a bit of weed and music (60's, beatles or delta blues for myself) but the fact youve already turned down gear (be it shit or not) is a really positive sign. just keep thinking about that feeling when youve hit up and still feel barely well enough to lie still on a sofa.. or of what you could indulge yourself with with all the spare money youll have around. wish you every success, good luck

I'd love something romantic to happen with her - and theres certainly a lot of potential, but not until I'm well. You know how it is when you're in WD's, its like someone stole your soul. I already told her I had a slip up about a week ago and bought and 8th, and thats what I'm paying for now. Valium in combination with weed helps A LOT I must say, but the ideal way through the woes of withdrawl for me has always been a combination of Valium, codeine and hash. I cant handle just the hash on its own - sends me into a paranoid wreck.
 
isnt it strange how weed seems to have that paranoia effect on people who never had problems with it in the past. i dont know if its an ex-smack thing, as most of my anecdotal findings come from that direction. do you still have problems with it whilst on your own? for me the paranoia only comes when im outside the door




feel for ya on the girl mate, im knee deep in addiction and trying to woo my moms next door neighbours daughter who i doubt has ever even seen a drug much less taken one. safe to say the mask i am required to don would make even freddy kruegar seem approacable

and i hear ya on the wd's/soul thing. sometimes i pray to god for forgivness for the shit ive done in the past. always after scoring though, never before
 
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still nice stuff about very dark on the foil taste strong n gives me that old skooll itchy feeling that i have not had in ages prob cause ive dropped ma meth down to 55 from 70 so i can feel the gear better and i can still manage a few bags a week and be on 55 and not ever feel bad. altho ii got sum cash recently n must of bought 15 shots in the past week so upping ma meth again for after this binge.

loads of shotters doing the nice gear about here nice chunky bags aswell .3 or .4 the norm from most doors here, nice to have consistant decent gear att ure door step!
 
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