For me Valium caused more harm than good at the end of the day, it definitely helped me through some rough times and if I took my dose as soon as I felt a potential panic attack coming on i usually wouldn't go into a full blown attack, just popping the pills seemed to instantly relax me as I felt prepared. The horrible lengthy withdrawal syndrome I went through when it came time to get off Valium completely nullified all the benefits I got from being on it, it seriously effected my life for a couple of months and my work, personal life and my relationship with my girlfriend suffered badly. For me it wasn't worth it, looking back it would have been better for me to have stuck to more natural treatments for anxiety and insomnia - exercise, good intensive cognitive behavioural therapy (which I did receive though probably not enough), meditation, a healthy diet, staying off other drugs as much as possible and focusing on and practicing keeping my train of thought in check and as positive as I could. Instead I had a tendency to wallow in my own self pity, ate like shit or not at all, smoked way too much meth and speed (which I started doing because I wanted to get high but was on methadone/bupe so couldn't use smack and of course benzos really allow you to binge hard on stims) and relied on the Valium to solve my anxiety issues. If I was more committed to solving my issues rather than trying to bury or run away from them I probably could have done away with the Valium altogether or at least only used it when I really needed it, if I'd not let myself become physically addicted to it it probably would have helped me a great deal more and been beneficial in the long run.
Benzo addiction causes the 'kindling' effect that alcohol and barbs also cause, each time you fall back into addiction the length and severity of the withdrawal increases and the amount of time it takes to become physically dependent decreases. About 6 weeks after the withdrawal ended when i first kicked Valium I bought about 20 5mg pills and took them all in a 4 day binge and was thrown back into pretty much full blown withdrawal which I was NOT expecting. After going through withdrawal twice in 6 months I've steered clear from using benzos for more than a day in a row and for no more than one day a week at the very least and when I do I take as little as I can to achieve the result I want. Benzo addiction is a ninja that sneaks up on you and considering what i personally get out of them the withdrawal far outweighs the benefits or enjoyment I get from them.
Also I experienced some pretty sever brain zaps during withdrawal, it was worse the first time I kicked them because I had also come off a 6 month binge on amps but I still got them the second time around. They truly suck. And Jesus the headaches and horribly dry eyes I got during withdrawal were unspeakably nasty, for me benzo withdrawal is easily as bad as opiate withdrawal and there doesnt seem to be as easily obtainable remedies (apart from maybe phenibut or clonodine?) like codeine or pst that you can use to ease opiate withdrawal, you just have to sweat it out.
For anyone suffering from insomnia I would recommend trying anti histamines or melatonin before benzos to see if you get results. Apparently the first gen antihistamine hydroxyzine has been shown to be superior to alprazolam in reducing insomnia in trials, it's also apparently pretty effective as an anxiolytic and has the added bonus of not being physically addictive. It's prescription only but I would imagine a doctor would be far happier prescribing it over Xanax or Valium.
