Open Discussion Rant about people who seek your advice and then vanish.

SB1981

SB1981

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 26, 2013
Messages
581
Location
Nevada, USA
So three people have private messaged me this week and asked for my regarding IV use. I replied and not one of them even took the time to let me know how their situation turned out. Just fon't in box me and take my advice and run. I don't need friendship, I just want to know how it turned out for the person. I think it's rude as hell to PM someone and then never think twice about said person again. Don't make it personal unless you plan on filling me in a bit. What is up with that shit?
 
People often are seeking information and may feel that keeping you posted how things are going could be bothering or pestering you. You could always fire off a message to them asking how they got on, this will show that your happy to chat etc.
 
I don't expect anything for helping anyone out, I guess it would be nice to shoot the shit at times.
 
I can sort of relate to what you mean, not so much get back to me on how they got on... but I do give up a lot of my time (as do others - and I think that's what makes BL so great) to help some people on here as much as I can and it bugs me a little bit that they can't be bothered to even say a quick thank you. I've always been appreciative of the time that people take to help me. I dunno... doesn't take 30 seconds to post 'thanks very much, really appreciate that...'
 
I've been a mod for bit - don't do it for the love, or the replies etc. I do it because I feel it might just help a person I know you say it doesn't take 30 seconds to say thank you - if everyone I chatted with send me a simple 'thankyou' message it would slow me down so much.

Depends on the person I guess
 
I understand where you're coming from SB, and I've experienced this before IRL as well. The thing to remember is that even if the person does not give energy back to you in some way, you will be given back to from other sources, just like they will eventually pay it forward somehow to someone else. When giving counsel to someone, you might receive something in return but maybe not from the person/source you're looking at. IME that's how the universe tends to work.

Also, some people just don't express gratitude... but maybe you just need to re-frame how you view giving/receiving in order to help you feel better. As for wanting to hear back from them about how it panned out, that might never happen, so you just gotta trust that it's taken care of.
 
SB1981 said:
So three people have private messaged me this week and asked for my regarding IV use. I replied and not one of them even took the time to let me know how their situation turned out. Just fon't in box me and take my advice and run. I don't need friendship, I just want to know how it turned out for the person. I think it's rude as hell to PM someone and then never think twice about said person again. Don't make it personal unless you plan on filling me in a bit. What is up with that shit?
Click to expand...

Unfortunately that's the way things are at times. Just because these people haven't replied, does not mean that you have not helped them in some way. For instance, I like to greet the new members in NNI and they will not all reply to the thread - but that doesn't mean they have not read the information, saw the links I've posted to them and what-not. Even if they have not; others lurking may have benefited from that information - and I, myself, have benefited from trying to help another person.

I've a suggestion if you really feel that you'd like to help people with IV use etc, you could perhaps do a periodic blog with different information each week - you may not receive replies but you'll have many viewers and you'll help so many. That's an idea you could think of?

I do understand where you coming from though. It is important to feel appreciated when we help others but I'm slowly starting to realise that I don't necessarily need appreciation for helping people - I get the reward from KNOWING I'm helping them in some way, if that makes sense.

Sorry I've not read all the other responses in this thread - just your post and it reached out to me in the way that you're trying to help other people.

In a nutshell; You're making a difference even if you're not always shown that you are; and try to feel good about that because you are possibly saving lives if not people from infections etc. Hope that helps somehow????

Evey

PS: Foreigner I like that response. You've not ever read "The Power of Intention" by Wayne Dyer, have you? Discusses spirituality, the university etc
 
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