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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Random MSN Gibberings XCIII: Moral of the story is to wank more

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SamhainGrim said:
In all likelihood they're too busy wanking.
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:D I wasn't skirting the issue, I was at work/wanking (delete as appropriate).

Shambles, I thought we'd already agreed to trade for the day? I'm dubious about this "one careful owner" business though ;)

edit: gusset typing? :D
 
Shambles said:
Well, it depends were you draw the line on ownership really, Ms Eff. Only one fer sure owner. The occasional rental. Careful... ? You may have a point :D

And yes, gusset-typing. Home keys and everything.
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It was the careful bit I was contesting :D

How are you Shammy?
 
Am not so bad thanks, Ms Eff. Aside from this bastard sore wrist. And possibly short of a wank. Nice as it is to have picked up me script of late even minor opiates tend to interrupt one's wanking regime somewhat. From triggerhappy to cannae be arsed in but a few hundred mg 8)

And yeah, "careful" would likely be pushing it to be fair. Then again, it's still attached so owt beyond that is but a bonus :D

And how's your good self, Ms Eff? On the wanking front or in general. As you please.
 
Seconded.

But in the meantime, any boys gonna own up to making wanknoises? I know I have done over the years but is a rarity. Usually invovles a comedown wank. Or a w/d wank. One of those uberintense - and usually very brief - affairs. That or the massively extended stim wank sesh wank. That's probably a mixture of relief and exhaustion over ecstatic wankjoy though.
 
Even at the end of a 24+ hour stim sesh the noise is purely bedsprings rather than vocal. I try and keep it quiet, don't really see the point when alone, especially in shared accomodation.

Oh, on another note, Albion, I played Journey for about half an hour and it was a pretty alright game so far, I still don't really have a clue what I'm meant to be doing though, I keep trying to get up to the big mountain but the wind blows me down the sand dunes. I have sought shelter in the ruins of what seems to be an old castle for the time being. Do I need to buy playstation+ for it to have more features, or should I watch that walkthrough link you posted earlier with the annoying guy asking me to click like every 2 seconds?

It is a good game so far, I just want to get more out of it, I can definitely understand how it would be good on psychs too, I like the music that I can make when jumping and floating around.
 
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If I've got the house to myself I make a hideous time-stretched whistling groan which sounds like the strange noise in the middle of 'The Funk Soul Brother' as discussed with Albion the other week. If it's an actual two person sex act lots of swearing is my preferred method of announcing the onset of the vinegar strokes.
 
I got so used to suppressing my wanking noises as a teenager I don't really know what sound would come naturally? Sometimes a sigh of relief slips out, like a weight has been lifted. Like, sweet, I don't have to think about that for 5 minutes 8)
 
"Don't really see the point when alone" Mugz? That implies it's a choice rather than a necessity. Surely the lack of choice is the whole point of wanknoises? I would feel a bit of a twit if I started grunting and gasping and unngh-ing just to convince myself I'd done it right (=D). Sigh of disappoinment is probably nearer the mark most times though :D

On a related note, when with the Occasional Mrs Shambles (quite some time ago then 8)) she'd let out the most outrageous scream at "that moment". Not even remotely sexy as sexnoises go cos it sounded more like a well-stabby rape had just occurred than a moment of passion. In context it was ubersexy, naturally. But nary a noise from me beyond a slight juddery exhalation maybe. And that's full-on day-long geebee-fuelled sex sessions too. Suspect I'm just no good at naughtynoise :(
 
Mr Smokes Blunts. said:
I got so used to suppressing my wanking noises as a teenager I don't really know what sound would come naturally?
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Good point - I think that probably lies at the heart of the male / female sexual noise split, along with cultural conditioning and of course a fair old bit of personal preferences and kinks.

A lot of women don't get the urge to make much noise at all but find themselves doing so in order to reassure a partner. On the other hand some love vocalising to the point where you want to scream "shut the fuck up, you can't be enjoying it that much". Or even "are you okay?".

Whereas nearly 100% of women will do a runner should you start making a noise akin to that of our hero Bully at the end of a round of Bullseye.
 
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Mr Smokes Blunts. said:
I got so used to suppressing my wanking noises as a teenager I don't really know what sound would come naturally? Sometimes a sigh of relief slips out, like a weight has been lifted. Like, sweet, I don't have to think about that for 5 minutes 8)
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All the best wanks are the ones where the parents are next door (I'm thinking back 22 years here) and you have to be utterly SILENT, you have take it so slowly that the intensity of your orgasm builds up over minutes rather than the usual seconds. Thanks mum and dad! Now I feel disgusting.
 
SamhainGrim said:
Whereas nearly 100% of women will do a runner should you start making a noise akin to that of our hero Bully at the end of a round of Bullseye.
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Such noises have ruined more pornos than I care to count.

knockando said:
All the best wanks are the ones where the parents are next door (I'm thinking back 22 years here) and you have to be utterly SILENT, you have take it so slowly that the intensity of your orgasm builds up over minutes rather than the usual seconds. Thanks mum and dad! Now I feel disgusting.
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I think it's cus you have to hold your breath for like the last minute of the wank, so not even a wimper comes out. It's probably where people get the idea to put a noose round their neck and a lemon in their mouth.
 
Mr Smokes Blunts. said:
I think it's cus you have to hold your breath for like the last minute of the wank, so not even a wimper comes out. It's probably where people get the idea to put a noose round their neck and a lemon in their mouth.
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I was thinking more of suppressing the noise of the fapping than the whimpering ;) I've never eaten lemons during climax myself!
 
I love lemons anyway, but I can't bear to think of the face made by a guy who's coming with a lemon in his mouth without laughing!
 
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