Venting Ran out of medication and feeling withdrawal efffects

[cowardescent]

I was taking 2mg of risperidone for about a month and a half. This was treating my homicidal thoughts but most importantly the withdrawal I was facing after being messed up from benzos (took 600 tablets diazepam in the span of two months in Aug-Nov 2017). Didn't feel the effects of that because my psych kept me on quetiapine as well as abilify and so when I went off of everything last year, I experienced withdrawal. That's when I started injuring myself feeling extreme agitation and started breaking chairs.

Things were getting back on track last month, going to college and doing well but now that I've ran out for two weeks and can't get money to refill it even though I have a prescription, the agitation is coming back. This sucks balls. I'm thinking of suiciding. It costs only €14 but I don't have the cash. My parents aren't taking it seriously atm. Need it to get a job and I have been applying but haven't getting anything.

 

[Mafioso]

Go for a run, or find a healthy way to get that aggression out of you. Run or lift weights until you feel you can't go any further, then see if your anger is still at the same level. Generally, I find it subsides with intense exercise.

It's a momentary fix, just as breathing and grounding can be as well. If you can focus that anger, you might be able to find some ways to come up with the cash. Short of digging for cans, I'm sure there are quite a few ways to earn 14 euros. Granted I'm in the states, so my ideas may be way off- but you can do simple shit like mow and edge lawns(if you own the tools). Probably take 1-3 lawns to get enough to fill your script. You could pawn some low value items(only recommend because of self-harm). There are apps like "fiver" where you can do minimal tasks for roughly $5.

Is there a reason you ran out of your script early or can't afford it like normal? I don't understand why your parents wouldn't help out either... is there some bad blood there?

 

[cowardescent]

My parents really don't believe in medication even though I know it helps. They tried it once but I gained weight and they didn't want me on it and used that as an excuse. Besides, the only person who has money is my father who is abroad now. My mother can't help me in that regard.

It sucks that it's only €14 but can't even get the money.

 

[stigma]

Have you called your prescribing doctor? Maybe they can help.