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Quitting/Tapering Thread.

Hey mate - good to hear you got some sleep without breaking your taper. 100 mg of diazepam is a massive dose. Do you have a big tolerance?

Can I ask what you mean when you say CWE has been a failure?

Cheers

CF
 
It wasn't a taper, after 11 days CT and going through most of what you have described it kind of feels like failing if I have some codeine now, and others see it that way but I know one small dose will not lead to being back on it, instead I will sleep and be in the gym tomorrow and free of it.

I do have a tolerance for Benzos but 20 pills for a few hours sleep is ridiculous. I will be giving the other 30 to someone who has supported me through this and has a benzo habit. I ain't going there again. 11 days off codeine is a long time compared to PST. I can feel your pain. Hang in there.
 
Good stuff. 11 days is awesome. I'm only nearing the end of day 4 and am also been crippled by sleeping issues. It just takes so much out of you and makes it very difficult to spare the slightest bit of energy for positive thought.

If I may ask what is the plan for you now?
 
Now it is back to a routine of healthy living. Start everyday with a couple hours exercise for natural endorphines and relishing not having to be on a constant chemist run. Decided for the New Year that I won't drink at all for the next 12 months. I miss how good I felt while fit and healthy. I will occasionally use opiates still, but that will be back to only once every few months or so. Life will take care of itself under those conditions.

Just remember, what your going through will end. After day 4 it only gets better. Stay away from PST in future, I've been there and it is the only opiate I would gladly never touch again. Its an unknown cocktail rather than a single drug like codeine, that's why it is so difficult.
 
Sorry to double post and complain even more but this insomnia is something else. I slept a grand total of 0 hours last night and found myself walking through farm paddocks barefoot at 2 am like a zombie.

I was wondering if anyone has any experience with Restavit (doxylamine) for treating short term insomnia?
 
Doxylamine can help. Some people tolerate it better than others. Have you taken it before? In what amount? It certainly is sedating and might be enough to get you some sleep - which would beat wandering around in a paddock, right?

I must be virtually allergic to it, because even in miniscule amounts it knocks me out but leaves me feeling like an absolute zombie for nearly the entire next day. So I always had to think thrice before taking the shit, because I honestly don't know what's worse - not sleeping and feeling exhausted the next day, or sleeping and feeling totally blank and useless the next day.

Worst experience I had was taking a whole 25mg tablet (for me that's an enormous amount - don't ask me why I'm so sensitive to this shit) when I'd not slept for a couple of days due to an a-PVP binge. What happened? I still didn't sleep but I spent the whole night fucking hallucinating. No shit. Not visual distortions - actual aural and visual hallucinations of first insects crawling around and then as it got worse larger objects darting around the house.

At the peak of the thing I was so paranoid all I could do to keep myself sane was to pull out my phone and hit record, because I figured by the time it wore off I'd either be:

A) relieved that it had all been a freakish hallucinatory nightmare

OR

B)very rich by the time I uploaded the creatures I saw onto YouTube

Gee I done some stupid shit. And I wish I could add to that 'back in the days' - but that was like a month ago.
 
Reminds me of the time I took 250mg of promethazine. I won't get into it but it was absolutely disgustingly awful. I've never understood how people can consider antihistamines as recreational but each to their own.
 
Yeah antihistamines can feel pretty awful in higher doses (although not as bad as seroquel - no come down is as bad as seroquel makes me feel).
 
^ You know I'm pretty concerned at how frequently I'm hearing people (I mean friends of mine in real life, not people on BL) being prescribed. It seems there's an increase in the frequency of presciption. It's bad enough that anti-depressants are thrown around in many cases where they were not appropriate, but a potent anti-psychotic?

I swear I am increasingly concerned and suspicious about the motives of GPs and/or psychiatrists. Seroquel should not be thrown around. It's the right thing in SOME cases - severe cases.

Anti-psychotics shouldn't be fucked with. I'm not writing this at you, Crankinit, I'm just saying in general because your post reminded me. And I agree, I hate the feeling of waking up after first gen anti-histamines, but after anti-psychotics? Shit... that's something else altogether.
 
I was prescribed Seroquel for extremely mild and occasional sleeping issues when I was a teenager, and that was by a bonafide psychiatrist*. What put me off was the ridiculous price for a box at ~$120. I don't know if the price has changed or if it's under the PBS now.

* I should probably point out that to this day I'm pretty sure that psychiatrist was grooming me for sex.
 
so i had a relapse last week, not happy but i'm at day number 5 from no more harry.

I've also gone from 4mg of bupe a day to 0mg a day in the same time. and i'm feeling fine 99.
 
I should probably point out that to this day I'm pretty sure that psychiatrist was grooming me for sex.

Goddamit! I'm sick to death of hearing shit like that. It's way too common. The world of psychiatry is at danger of being the new corrupt Catholic priest at this rate.

I can think of at least two people who are close friends who have had experiences in "therapy" with a psych so bad I could hardly believe what I was hearing. Then last year I experienced my own encounter, which, as time goes by, is even worse than i thought at the time. Nothing sex related, but what I thought was merely spectacular incompetence on his behalf now occurs to me as being potentially soemthing more sinister.

My three sessions with this guy were comical at first, because he seemed pleasantly preoccupied and forgetful of things we had talked about just minutes ago, but the whole thing changed pretty quick when he started lecturing me in a headmaster-style tone about taking diazepam. I had to remind him that HE PRESCIBED IT TO ME IN THE LAST SESSION. He had totally forgotten about it, and it was clear he didn't really care at all about who I was or why I was there.

On our first session, without having asked me anything, he pulled lithium out of thin air as a suggested course of treatment. However, he didn't prescribe it, and never mentioned it again in the following two sessions. He prescibed valium generously on the second session, then chastised me for taking it in the third (and final) session. The third session he was like a man on a mission, as well as a broken record: he was now convinced that I MUST, at all costs, without delay, get onto methadone. He would not listen to anything I said and just kept repeating, like a mantra, 'methadone, methadone'. There was simply no continuity and seemingly no logic behind his suggestions.

On the third session I realised this was not only a waste of time, but deeply offensive. I was at a dangerously low point mentally and physicaly, and I had stupidly believed that this man, with his 13 years of study and work in the field of psychiatry, might be able to help me improve my conditions. When I confronted him with his idiocy - by simply reminding him that he had been pulling random medications out of the air and not following up on them, - he very quickly showed a different side. For a minute or so he seemed defensive, like he couldn't believe that I, a lowly psycho patient, would question a great learned doctor. The doctors' arrogance showed itself briefly.

Then he calmed down, leaned back in his chair and looked at me and - I swear this is true - said: "You know, you might end up killing yourself". I stared at him in disbelief, because we'd never talked about suicide and had just a second ago being talking about why he had forgotten prescribing me valium, and then he comes out with that.

I waited for a follow up. There was none. He just started blankly. And I thought to myself: "Could this man possibly be trying, out of pure spite, to be putting ideas into my head?" It seemed too crazy, but as time goes by I can recall several comments along those lines, with no follow up or help. Passive-aggressive. Dangerous. Possibly a psychopath. That's what I thought as we sat in silence. He then said that I did NOT have any mental illness. This part blew my mind and the whole thing just unravelled from there. I am positive he was toying with me.

I asked why, on the first appointment, he had suggested that I try lithium. He had not asked me anything about my well-documented conditions. It seemed clear that he had not read my referring psychologists notes, or the GPs report. Not one question. There's severe depression running like a plague through my mother's side, and has been a defining aspect of my own life experience since as long as I can remember. There are hospital and institution records that go back 60 years telling a story of my struggle, my mother's struggle, and her mother's struggle. It's hardly a secret.

Bottom line: He didn't care, and was in fact malicious in his throw-away comments about killing myself or getting locked up for drug use and possession.

When confronted, his line was always this: "It's not like that". That's all he'd say, no reasoning or defense of his incompetence.

I do not wish to slander anyone, but this man I believe could be very dangerous - either intentionally or otherwise. PM me if anyone is concerned about a psych they have seen, or are seeing in the Collingwood/Fitzroy area. I won't name the street on here. But I've been thinking about this for the last couple of months, and I'm genuinely concerned. I'm wondering what I should do, if anything.

But I have an amazingly caring and supportive partner and brother. If I had been less stable, and I had thought that doctor was my last chance, I very well may have killed myself after that last meeting, because I left there feeling as low and worthless as I've ever felt in my life.
 
My ex-wife went to a psychiatrist for depression and anxiety.

In no time he had her on ridiculously high levels of Zoloft and all the Xanax you could want, in the form of bottles of 100 2mg Karma. She became manic and totally under his control. I could see what was going on. Apparently all her problems stemmed back to me. Whenever I said anything I got obviously schooled answers. It was like "Dr noname said you'd say that" or "Ï think he would know more than you" etc.

It took its toll on me and with so much alpraz around I ended up with a benzo habit. Despite his constant subtle suggestions of leaving me and the kids he apparently acted shocked when she did. I found out a lot of this afterwards.

A few months after our break-up I got a phone call from her says "you right all along". The "doctor" had made a pass at her so she left and went to the local hospital. The psychiatrists there response was "another victim of Dr noname".

Apparently he has broken up many marriages and been on multiple sexual charges. He is also a qualified barrister and has got off every charge. What chance has a mental patient against a respected psychiatrist and barrister?

Professionals normally stick together, but at the hospital they told her the full story and described him as a psychopath, not in a general way but in their professional opinion.

For a long time I have harboured thoughts of putting an end to his fucking up of people's lives but have resigned myself to thinking the horse has bolted, this is my fault, I should have done something when I knew what was happening. When a hammer would have made a difference to my own families life.
 
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Halif said:
Then he calmed down, leaned back in his chair and looked at me and - I swear this is true - said: "You know, you might end up killing yourself". I stared at him in disbelief, because we'd never talked about suicide and had just a second ago being talking about why he had forgotten prescribing me valium, and then he comes out with that.

That is horrible, and super fucked up. It does seem that psychiatrists are notoriously bad - this reminds me of one I saw when I was at my lowest point, suicidal, and I asked the psychiatrist whether I'd ever be happy without drugs - I was looking for reassurance, some kind of hope for the future - and she told me straight that I'd never be happy without taking drugs (recreational drugs - meth and mdma at the time), and that I just needed to figure out how much to take each day for the best result. Pretty discouraging when I wanted so badly to quit.
 
Yeah, this is what I'm talking about... I'm hearing way too many of these stories, both from people in real life, and here on the board.

Who are these psychiatrists? Not asking for names, I'm asking in the broader sense. Are sociopaths drawn to the field of psychiatry because it has a high potential for manipulating people psychologically, and controlling them with medications.

It creeped me out when that idiot I saw kept harping on about methadone. I had told him I wasn't down for that, but just like Footscrazy says above, it seems that they frequently don't listen but rather push their own agenda. And I can barely believe I'm thinking this, because it's so twisted it's scary, but there seems to be a certain type of person (doctor of psychiatry, that is) who wants to toy with vulnerable people for their own amusement and to gain a sense of power.

That is seriously wrong. Bad enough to make me distrust the whole system, but I know that there are good ones out there, and there's a time and place for it. But shit, man... it;s enough to put you off trying. Personally, after TWO bad experiences with psychs, there's no way I'll see one again. The counsellors and psychologists I've seen were either benignly useless, or actually really genuine and did their best. The fact that they do 'talking therapy' and cannot put people onto drugs means they have less ability to control people in that way.

Dr Phibes: that story sickens me. I am seriously speechless. You're right that doctors in the system will close ranks and protect their own at any cost, no matter how badly it ruins someone's life. That's unfortunately also coming from the experience a friend of mine had. She fought for years, with professional legal assistance, at great cost to her. All she wanted was vindication. She didn't get it. She financially ruined herself fighting.

I've been thinking about writing to, or making an appointment if necessary, to see the psychologist who referred me that idiot psychiatrist and giving her a written account of my experience. I feel like I have to do something about this, because I am worried about all the other patients he's had, and will have.

Does anyone on this board know of any recourse at all that us 'lowly' patients have? Let me stress that I don't want to 'get revenge' or slander a man. I've more or less let it go, personally. But I cannot stop thinking about the damage he could cause.
 
I have been through a lot of psychiatrists and psychologists and I think the incidence of psychopaths, egomaniacs, control freaks etc is scarily high within those professions.

Of course there are some amazing people as well. My current psychiatrist is a great - extremely knowledgable and compassionate. My latest psychologist (I won't be going back) was terrible.

I was seeing a different woman who I thought I had a pretty solid connection with, but when she found out about my substance abuse issues she referred me to an 'addiction specialist' in the same practice. He was some straight edge goober who had never touched anything in his life and just straight up lectured me. It was probably the same as reading one of those pamphlets you see in the waiting room.

What was funny (in a bad way) was that he seemed to be slightly living vicariously through me and was way too interested in the stories I would tell about sex and drugs and asked some pretty inappropriate questions.
 
Hi guys,

I have been taking about 150mg codeine every day for about 1 year now. Over the past couple of weeks i have. Tappered down to 60mg per day. 30mg tablets. Im continuing to taper down untill i get to a much lower does. Then jump off and go ct. Does anyone know if i will have really bad wd from tappering this Low? I have went ct before but that was straight from my 150mg does and i quit after 2 weeks as I still had serve rls and couldnt sleep at all. Does anyone recommend just going ct now or continuing to lower?
X
 
Psychiatrists are the top of the food chain. There is noone qualified to judge them. Getting into a complex court case with them is a big mistake, I did discuss it with my wife but just the cost itself will kill let alone who you will use as an expert witness? a psychiatrist with a different opinion? There is no standard procedure. Any other profession has standard procedure and it is clear if you go outside that. The only possible course is to always secretly tape any session so it can be compared with his notes, but if you have to see a psych, you are probably, and should be, focussing on other issues than whether he is a sociopath.

Best thing is to always get a second opinion, as they suggest with any other doctor.

jadechick92 I can't imagine you having much of a problem, but everyone is different. The main factor in how bad the WD will be is your tolerance not the time using them. I went ct off a minimum of 1200mg per day 2 weeks ago (apart from one, relatively, small dose on day 11). I went through hell but am fine now.

If your happy with tapering I would suggest continuing to as low as possible, I would have if I had the control you seem to have.
 
To Jade: I second Dr Phibes notion of just continuing your taper if you have the means to do so. You've done a great job in lowering it so much, take it down a little further and there shouldn't be more than some psychological elements to deal with. Well done, Jade!

And Dr Phibes: I have no intention of going anywhere near a court. Like you said, and I said in relation to my friend, it's virtually an unwinnable battle and would simply provide more stress.

What I intend to do - and I'm not hung up on the outcome of this - is simply write an objective letter explaining my very poor experience and concern for the well-being of vulnerable patients under this man's "care". I will ask the referring psychologist for advice on where to send copies of this letter. That's all.

Personally, I was ready to let it go, but there's something knocking on my head (not literally, of course) which seems to demand that I do SOMETHING. If I write a letter about this man, and other people do (and perhaps they have done), then there'll be a stack of letters pointing an accusing finger. At the very least, it will not be a good look and may somehow warn others or lead to some suspicion on his practices.

That's all I'll do. If there's a chance to take it further, I'll consider that. I'm not going to get obsessed, but it's like I said, I cannot seem to get it out of my head, and that suggests that there's merit in taking action. He'll be accountable at some point. My pen has clout, even if it is slow acting.

Again, anyone who is concerned about a doctor of psychiatry practising in Fitzroy, PM me and give me a name. I am genuinely concerned about what others may get into with this man.
 
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