Mental Health PTSD/Suicidal using Amitriptyline, Mirtazapine and Olanzipine

[westhill]

Hi westhill

If you don't want to say where you are, pm us.
Don't let the system kill another of our great men who risked their lives.
Your life is really worth saving.
You fellow vets need you and you need them.
There is loads of help for combat stress online.
I looked at the combat stress website and saw devastated ex servicemen making a new meaningful life for themselves.
Above all, allow your self to grieve. Grief is very human and normal, especially in situations like yours.

Keep posting back.

Hi 3dmusic,
Thanks for your kind words, appreciated I was in touch with the website (combat stress) you mentioned earlier last year, met their rep and was offered intensive residential programme for Ptsd in future...but turned them down for some reason...not really sure why to be honest.II'll maybe think about contacting them again

 

[englishlady]

Yikes ! Your blood pressure is unstable? When can you see the psych again and punch his lights out (sorry mods, but seems reasonable to me). Seriously, change your doc. It is never "the end of the line" for someone with PTSD.

Do u work out? I hear that gives some kind of high to the athletic types like you must be. Can you cut back on the one beginning with A that seems to be the worst one. Double vision and palpitations could lead to somethng nasty. Please cut back, but unwise to stop all cold-turkey as you know I'm sure.

Are you a good cook ?

SO HAPPY you are ok. Thanks for letting us know.

Now to change the subject but to ask your opinion. Do u really think that Osama was given a burial at sea? I reckon he is in a big glass jar at the Smithsonian Museum in Washington DC. One of those massive tall jars like the aliens were in in the underground vault on 'Independence Day'. What is your professional opinion ?


Very best


Julie

 

[westhill]

Westhill, how to end the war that continues inside? That is the reality for combat veterans of every war as well as for the people that were just trying to live their lives in a country where war came to them. The exhaustion from your daily battles is crushing. Kindness and compassion are the only real healers--the kind you showed when you thought about the driver of the train. That is the only antidote. It takes such courage to feel. You may feel defeated by this but you are not.

You're a nice, kind person...thank you herbavore

 

[sinclair1984]

Hey westhill just checking to see if you've posted. I hope your doing better. I know that hell, I'm still in it but it's gotten a bit brighter over time. I know the bs sayings don't help. honestly nothing but time and talk helped me. I am going to try this thing called EMDR have you done that and if so how did it go? You can Pm me again anytime. I'm alway's around sooner than later. This site keeps me sane.

 

[westhill]

Yikes ! Your blood pressure is unstable? When can you see the psych again and punch his lights out (sorry mods, but seems reasonable to me). Seriously, change your doc. It is never "the end of the line" for someone with PTSD.

Do u work out? I hear that gives some kind of high to the athletic types like you must be. Can you cut back on the one beginning with A that seems to be the worst one. Double vision and palpitations could lead to somethng nasty. Please cut back, but unwise to stop all cold-turkey as you know I'm sure.

Are you a good cook ?

SO HAPPY you are ok. Thanks for letting us know.

Now to change the subject but to ask your opinion. Do u really think that Osama was given a burial at sea? I reckon he is in a big glass jar at the Smithsonian Museum in Washington DC. One of those massive tall jars like the aliens were in in the underground vault on 'Independence Day'. What is your professional opinion ?


Very best


Julie

Hi Julie,
The side effects are due to the high dose I take...hence I have an ECG and blood tests every so often. I am physically healthy which means my body can take it but I hate it and think somehow the meds are making me worse...mentally. To be honest I wouldn't care if I dropped dead with a heart attack, but the mental stuff is too much to bear at times. Some days are really bad. Think I'll stop the meds but when I have tried in the past I become physically ill and do not sleep for days...really. It's a viscous circle I am trapped in.
As for my professional opinion about you know who...I don't have one

 

[westhill]

Hey westhill just checking to see if you've posted. I hope your doing better. I know that hell, I'm still in it but it's gotten a bit brighter over time. I know the bs sayings don't help. honestly nothing but time and talk helped me. I am going to try this thing called EMDR have you done that and if so how did it go? You can Pm me again anytime. I'm alway's around sooner than later. This site keeps me sane.

Hi,
I have been offered EMDR and wasn't sure about it... said 'why not?' book me in' Nothing to lose anyway...just seems to be a struggle to make it everyday, never mind waiting for it (EMDR) to start in days or weeks from now. To be honest I barely got through yesterday. Thing is I don't even know who I am anymore, it's as if I am already dead in some kind of middle world anyway.
Good luck with the emdr, sounds like you've been through a lot

 

[englishlady]

I know with the heavy hitting drugs you have to taper them down gradually by increments, so your body gets used to the lower dose. That real bad one with an A at the start, maybe you could start reducing that by just 5mgs -- do u have a GP who could confirm it is safe for you to do that and who can sanction it with the psych guy? He might give you diazepam or something similar to help u sleep.

Heart problems can start with a string of heart attacks. Not much fun. Its not always one and only.

Your compadre Vet who spoke above, has it right. Time and talk are the only things which work but the infuriating thing is they take TIME.

Hey hey -- I got a smiley face from you about "you know who". You cheered me up no end, thank you! Right back at you ;-)

Do you have anyone to talk to, on a daily basis? Even if it is only banal chit chat? I hope so.

Keep in touch with us

Very best to you as ever


Julie

 

[3dmusic]

Hi Westhill

It's great to see you back
It would be great for you to contact combat stress, they'd welcome you with open arms.
I know a guy who contacted them twenty one years after leaving the service, and they welcomed him.
You can taper off your meds, slowly, one at a time, so they don't interfere with your sleep patterns or moods, but it has to be slowly.
I'm tapering off meds at the moment.
I also think psych meds are poisons that probably do us more harm than good.
Mine help me sleep but I am tapering them ever-so-slowly so that my normal natural sleep pattern can emerge smoothly.
I also think your current psychiatrist is a total nutcase, telling you it's the end of the line.
Keep posting, and don't let the system beat you down, you are better than that.

 

[paranoid android]

I sure am over the max levels, bp screwed, palpitations, blurred vision etc etc. Last time saw doc was told end of line, nowhere to go with any further med combo's...apart from maxing out over rec'd levels. Others who know about meds have also told me the meds are seriously going to kill me...seems therefore doc wants to keep me alive at cost of physical health seeing as suicide is unhealthy for the records? I really dont think these pills are helping me at all?

What other meds have you tried? There are lot's of other anti-depressants and anti-psychotics out there. And yes that dose of amitriptyline is cardio toxic enough but olanzapine is also cardiotoxic (though i don't think it's as bad as other anti-psychotics) so the 2 combined raises the risk of heart problems. Maybe getting the advice of another doctor would help.

 

[3dmusic]

Hi Westhill

How are you today.
I hope you can manage to get some support off line as well as on.
I hope you can also get your meds sorted.
Above all, I hope that you are still keeping your little spark lit through all of this.

 

[westhill]

What other meds have you tried? There are lot's of other anti-depressants and anti-psychotics out there. And yes that dose of amitriptyline is cardio toxic enough but olanzapine is also cardiotoxic (though i don't think it's as bad as other anti-psychotics) so the 2 combined raises the risk of heart problems. Maybe getting the advice of another doctor would help.

Got the advice off another doc...wants to change the meds, feeling good about it because maybe I can look forward to getting at least one night's peace. Thanks for your advice, very helpful

 

[westhill]

Hi Westhill

How are you today.
I hope you can manage to get some support off line as well as on.
I hope you can also get your meds sorted.
Above all, I hope that you are still keeping your little spark lit through all of this.

Hi, today is much better. Saw new doc and having radical med change (got to have another bloody ECG too...pain in the ass... (not literally!)). Extreme roller coaster I am on at the minute, going from about to end it to quite content in a matter of a day or so. It's quite dangerous I think to be honest.
Reading back through my posts I see my moods seem to be swing about quite quickly, never really noticed that before...just a note to self.
Thanks for being an ear...really helps ranting on an anonymous forum
Take care

 

[Nicholai]

Awesome That really was an obnoxious amount of amitriptaline that the other physician had you on. I can't imagine the side-effects that you would experience with that med regime. Glad to hear you found another doc.

I hope things continue to improve for you! Hang in there!

 

[JackiePeyton]

PTSD can affect those for years to come. My grandfather-that I never met, was killed in a freak accident-at a steel mill, a pipe gave way and molten steel burned 90% of his body. It was called a "one in a million accident". My mother liked to take him his lunch-she saw too much. It fucked her up. I think she had me to try to fix something. She shouldn't have. It went badly. I left home at 15 and haven't seen her since. I am trying not to mess up my own kids. Trying. But I have my own issues. It is a cycle.

 

[3dmusic]

Hi, today is much better. Saw new doc and having radical med change (got to have another bloody ECG too...pain in the ass... (not literally!)). Extreme roller coaster I am on at the minute, going from about to end it to quite content in a matter of a day or so. It's quite dangerous I think to be honest.
Reading back through my posts I see my moods seem to be swing about quite quickly, never really noticed that before...just a note to self.
Thanks for being an ear...really helps ranting on an anonymous forum
Take care

Yeah forums really help. It will be great to get your meds sorted also.

 

[ad lib]

Hi, today is much better. Saw new doc and having radical med change (got to have another bloody ECG too...pain in the ass... (not literally!)). Extreme roller coaster I am on at the minute, going from about to end it to quite content in a matter of a day or so. It's quite dangerous I think to be honest.
Reading back through my posts I see my moods seem to be swing about quite quickly, never really noticed that before...just a note to self.
Thanks for being an ear...really helps ranting on an anonymous forum
Take care

hopefully getting off the amitriptyline will help you. when i was on it, it made me extremely suicidal. i even attempted suicide by taking a large amount of it, and then woke up in a hospital bed. boy was i pissed.

how are you doing today?

 

[westhill]

hopefully getting off the amitriptyline will help you. when i was on it, it made me extremely suicidal. i even attempted suicide by taking a large amount of it, and then woke up in a hospital bed. boy was i pissed.

how are you doing today?

That's the problem with that stuff, you need xxhrs for it to do it's job even though unconscious, chances of being found during that time can be high...but it is very toxic and normally fatal if you have the time window. I researched other meds to mix with A to accelerate death to within 12-24hrs but is still too long. You are one of the few to survive an o.d. on it...bet you slept well ;-)
Tapering down 50mg a week from now...will take 7weeks get from 350 to nil...it's a fast drop but I've got nothing to lose by seeing what I'm like without it....then introducing another tryclic drug to reboost dopamine again....mixed with the anti psychotic and SSRI may give the system a re-boot.
If it doesn't. ..well fuck it, enough will be enough and at least I can say I tried, nothing wrong with that.
2hrs sleep last night...it's going to be a long few weeks me thinks...hopefully won't freak...anti psychotic increased to help...don't want to get paranoid too.
All the best Herb

 

[westhill]

Awesome That really was an obnoxious amount of amitriptaline that the other physician had you on. I can't imagine the side-effects that you would experience with that med regime. Glad to hear you found another doc.

I hope things continue to improve for you! Hang in there!

Side effects are extreme...nasty nasty drug.
I'm hanging on...thanks