Problem with Local Vigilante

[34-dihydroxyphen]

His girlfriend probably slipped up and said you were cute or something, and now he's flipping out about it because his manhood feels threatened when you come around.


Hence the ginormous muscles on the dude.

 

[His Name Is Frank]

His girlfriend probably slipped up and said you were cute or something, and now he's flipping out about it because his manhood feels threatened when you come around.


Hence the ginormous muscles on the dude.

Doubtful. Women don't tend to say things like, "That guy's cute." in front of their boyfriends. The female species is far more clever than we are when it comes to things like that. We on the other hand, will practically break our necks to check out a nice ass or set of tits right in front of our girlfriends.

Maybe this guy sells drugs himself and suspects you work for the competition. Who knows? We can all speculate here, but honestly, none of us can really give you the correct answer, redleader. This guy sounds like a complete psycho. I used to be a magnet for people like him when I was younger. They seemed to gravitate towards me, even in a large crowd of people. As I became a bit more callused and jaded towards people, it happened less and less. Sorry, I'm rambling.

Other than talking to the manager of this diner, I'm not sure what else you should do. He may have harassed patrons in the past and the manager may be able to shed some light on the subject. You've already found out that he's a contractor and most likely lied about being a former police officer, so odds are he's lying about his girlfriend being the manager of the diner.

 

[34-dihydroxyphen]

Doubtful. Women don't tend to say things like, "That guy's cute." in front of their boyfriends. The female species is far more clever than we are when it comes to things like that. We on the other hand, will practically break our necks to check out a nice ass or set of tits right in front of our girlfriends.

Maybe this guy sells drugs himself and suspects you work for the competition. Who knows? We can all speculate here, but honestly, none of us can really give you the correct answer, redleader. This guy sounds like a complete psycho. I used to be a magnet for people like him when I was younger. They seemed to gravitate towards me, even in a large crowd of people. As I became a bit more callused and jaded towards people, it happened less and less. Sorry, I'm rambling.

Other than talking to the manager of this diner, I'm not sure what else you should do. He may have harassed patrons in the past and the manager may be able to shed some light on the subject. You've already found out that he's a contractor and most likely lied about being a former police officer, so odds are he's lying about his girlfriend being the manager of the diner.

I was just trying to be flattering towards the OP, who felt offended that he was perceived in a negative way by this total asshole, and potentially his girlfriend. I've been there, it's a shitty feeling when people automatically assume the worst about you based on superficialities.

 

[RedLeader]

I am at the gym right now and guess who is also here lifting?

I am in a "fuck it" kind of mood today, so I just walked right up to him and told him to let me know if he needed a spot.

He looked confused for a minute and then said "my weight, my problem." Then put his headphones back in.

I tried. But hopefully we are getting to a point where we can just ignore one another, if we can't become BFFs.

 

[L2R]

kudos on your handling, RL.

 

[His Name Is Frank]

I was just trying to be flattering towards the OP, who felt offended that he was perceived in a negative way by this total asshole, and potentially his girlfriend. I've been there, it's a shitty feeling when people automatically assume the worst about you based on superficialities.

Damn it. I just had to go screw it up and deflate RedLeader's ego. Of course the waitress thought he was sexy. The guy secretly thinks so, too. That's why he wants RL to stay away. He knows he can only fight those feelings for so long before he finally gives in. :D

Stay diplomatic, RedLeader. If more people handled the crazies of the world as well as you're doing, we'd have no wars. This guy seems determined to be a jerk til the bitter end. Doubtful you'll ever become BFFs or hatch it out over tea and crumpets, but maybe this guy will finally see that you're not going anywhere and leave you alone.

 

[footscrazy]

^ I'm curious to why the gym staff member was so vague about it. But who knows. The whole situation is weird as fuck if you ask me.

I agree with this too. The way RL wrote about what the gym guy said made it sound really shifty.

Seems like you're dealing with it well though RL. I agree with not showing any fear, I think being fairly indifferent to him, like you're doing, is the best course of action.

I'd try this approach: Next time you see him, tell him you saw a purple Nissan parked by such and such business. But it sped off before you could get the plate number.

I know you've already said you wouldn't say this, RL. But I wouldn't mention it also because of the real possibility the purple car doesn't even exist. The guy seems to have gone off on a few different tangents now, which don't all seem very plausible. It wouldn't be great to play along with a game only to have the guy know you're lying to him or trying to manipulate him.

how about, "The guy was making me afraid for my life, and I am concerned about what he might do to me or others."

Just IMO, I don't agree saying this is a good idea. Unless you are actually scared for your life, which it doesn't seem like you are, I think saying this would appear to be giving the situation far more concern than it deserves. Saying you're scared for your life is a pretty big statement, and saying it to the gym staff seems passive, and gives this guy too much power. If you were scared for your life, I think you'd probably deal with it in another way rather than telling the gym staff.

I hope it all works out for you RL, it does seem like you're handling it well. Good on you not letting it get to you too much or letting it intimidate you, I know I would be feeling pretty damn uncomfortable after all that.

 

[curiosity]

stick to your routine, carry a weapon disguised as something harmless or some sort of defense who cares if it's unfair or w/e this guy's being an ass, only stop going there if the owner tells you to, but of course continue to use your gym.

 

[MazDan]

For heavens sake, dont carry a weapon of any type...........thats just asking for trouble one way or another.

Your doing fine mate by simply going about your business which is totally open and honest.

The guy sounds like a nut job who thinks he is bigger than ben hur. His actions on the second meeting seem to confirm that and contractor could mean anything from lawn mower to take the garbage out dipshit.

I would lay odds of london to a brick he has no relationship at all with the restaurant manager and equally never been a cop.............CIA I would believe though after seeing the type of people you Americans allow into it on Survivor

 

[Help?!?!]

TLDR: RedLeader is being pain and gained.....soon he'll be kidnapped then ransomed/etc.......



Movie to follow.....

 

[Fjones]

Just IMO, I don't agree saying this is a good idea. Unless you are actually scared for your life, which it doesn't seem like you are, I think saying this would appear to be giving the situation far more concern than it deserves. Saying you're scared for your life is a pretty big statement, and saying it to the gym staff seems passive, and gives this guy too much power. If you were scared for your life, I think you'd probably deal with it in another way rather than telling the gym staff.

I hope it all works out for you RL, it does seem like you're handling it well. Good on you not letting it get to you too much or letting it intimidate you, I know I would be feeling pretty damn uncomfortable after all that.

I agree, and I retract my suggestion. As others have said, RL seems to have taken the best approach, which is to do nothing (This is often the best approach. I need a reminder of this fact myself from time to time.)

 

[RecklessWOT]

Tell this guy to fuck himself. You're eating at a diner and working out at a gym. As long as you're not actually stalking/harassing women then he is just mistaken and there's not shit he or anyone else can do about it. And hopefully if he "used to be a cop" then he will be smart enough (edit: informed enough. Don't want to give these fucks any more credit than they deserve and let them think they're smart...) to know that it's a public place and if he beats your ass for no reason then he is fucked. If there is surveillance they can watch it and see that you are doing nothing wrong. And last but not least, YOU ARE DOING NOTHING WRONG. You're simply eating at a diner that's near your house and working out at the fucking gym next door. How is that possibly a problem? This guy bothering you and putting his hands on you is not only misguideded, but it's technically assault on its own and he could get in trouble for that alone. But fuck calling the cops. No need to drag the enemy into this one. If this guy punches you in the face or something, stab him in the fucking neck. Shoot him in the dick. Fuck this guy up real bad, it will be self defense. You minded your business, some huge dude fucked with you repeatedly until he ultimately took it out on you physically, and his stupid ass got maimed or killed as a result. Fucking serves his ass right. I fucking hate people like that and have no problem with the thought of taking one out if need be and laws allow it.
Hopefully you guys can get past it though and just co-exist at he same gym. Dude's probably just a meat head that needed to flex his manhood a little against some long hair.

 

[His Name Is Frank]

Tell this guy to fuck himself. You're eating at a diner and working out at a gym. As long as you're not actually stalking/harassing women then he is just mistaken and there's not shit he or anyone else can do about it. And hopefully if he "used to be a cop" then he will be smart enough (edit: informed enough. Don't want to give these fucks any more credit than they deserve and let them think they're smart...) to know that it's a public place and if he beats your ass for no reason then he is fucked. If there is surveillance they can watch it and see that you are doing nothing wrong. And last but not least, YOU ARE DOING NOTHING WRONG. You're simply eating at a diner that's near your house and working out at the fucking gym next door. How is that possibly a problem? This guy bothering you and putting his hands on you is not only misguideded, but it's technically assault on its own and he could get in trouble for that alone. But fuck calling the cops. No need to drag the enemy into this one. If this guy punches you in the face or something, stab him in the fucking neck. Shoot him in the dick. Fuck this guy up real bad, it will be self defense. You minded your business, some huge dude fucked with you repeatedly until he ultimately took it out on you physically, and his stupid ass got maimed or killed as a result. Fucking serves his ass right. I fucking hate people like that and have no problem with the thought of taking one out if need be and laws allow it.
Hopefully you guys can get past it though and just co-exist at he same gym. Dude's probably just a meat head that needed to flex his manhood a little against some long hair.

And the award for Worst Possible Advice goes to...

 

[treezy z]

get mace or other non-lethal protection. most states if you fuck someone up bad in self-defense you go to jail.

 

[socko]

Don't patronize any business that hires thugs to work as "contractors." Also, tell the managers of the gym and the diner why you won't be a customer any more. Also, write a "letter to the editor" of your local paper so everyone knows about the problem.

Get a bicycle and ride it to a gym that is farther away. If you can't bike to a gym, buy a cheap home-gym off craigslist. And finally, find out which car the thug drives, don't go there for a couple of weeks so things cool down and you won't be suspected, and then when he is not looking, key the fsck out of his car and slash his tires.

 

[treezy z]

Don't patronize any business that hires thugs to work as "contractors." Also, tell the managers of the gym and the diner why you won't be a customer any more. Also, write a "letter to the editor" of your local paper so everyone knows about the problem.

Get a bicycle and ride it to a gym that is farther away. If you can't bike to a gym, buy a cheap home-gym off craigslist. And finally, find out which car the thug drives, don't go there for a couple of weeks, then key the fsck out of his car and slash his tires.

so, basically, let him control your life through bullying.

 

[socko]

There is nothing wrong with finding a better environment. It's just not worth the hassle of dealing with low-life cop/security guards every time you want to exercise. If his current gym hires thugs, it's not worth spending money there. As long as he (Red Leader) makes it public knowledge (letter to the editor) that this is how that gym and diner treats its customers, he can hurt them financially and will come out ahead.

Look at it this way, if a gang of bullies started lurking at your gym or favorite cafe, and management was unwilling to do anything about it even after you complained, would you keep going?

As a real life example, some dick-head security guard at some large department store at a nearby strip mall harassed someone for riding a bicycle to the store. The cyclist, in turn, told his bike club about it, many of them complained to the management, boycotted, wrote letters to the editor, etc, and finally management put in bike racks and welcomed cyclists.


p.s.

There are online review sites where you can write about your experience at that gym and diner. A lot of people read reviews before deciding check out a new gym or restaurant. Make sure the public knows what kind of place that gym is.

 

[Illyria99]

I am at the gym right now and guess who is also here lifting?

I am in a "fuck it" kind of mood today, so I just walked right up to him and told him to let me know if he needed a spot.

He looked confused for a minute and then said "my weight, my problem." Then put his headphones back in.

I tried. But hopefully we are getting to a point where we can just ignore one another, if we can't become BFFs.

This is fucking creepy as shit. He's stalking you, but why?

Just be careful. This guy sounds like a psychopath.

 

[lostNfound]

Just let him rape you already.

NSFW:

with this is in your butt......

NSFW:

 

[RecklessWOT]

Tell this guy to fuck himself. You're eating at a diner and working out at a gym. As long as you're not actually stalking/harassing women then he is just mistaken and there's not shit he or anyone else can do about it. And hopefully if he "used to be a cop" then he will be smart enough (edit: informed enough. Don't want to give these fucks any more credit than they deserve and let them think they're smart...) to know that it's a public place and if he beats your ass for no reason then he is fucked. If there is surveillance they can watch it and see that you are doing nothing wrong. And last but not least, YOU ARE DOING NOTHING WRONG. You're simply eating at a diner that's near your house and working out at the fucking gym next door. How is that possibly a problem? This guy bothering you and putting his hands on you is not only misguideded, but it's technically assault on its own and he could get in trouble for that alone. But fuck calling the cops. No need to drag the enemy into this one. If this guy punches you in the face or something, stab him in the fucking neck. Shoot him in the dick. Fuck this guy up real bad, it will be self defense. You minded your business, some huge dude fucked with you repeatedly until he ultimately took it out on you physically, and his stupid ass got maimed or killed as a result. Fucking serves his ass right. I fucking hate people like that and have no problem with the thought of taking one out if need be and laws allow it.
Hopefully you guys can get past it though and just co-exist at he same gym. Dude's probably just a meat head that needed to flex his manhood a little against some long hair.

And the award for Worst Possible Advice goes to...

Lol okay so maybe I was being a little extreme with the whole 'stab him in the fucking neck' part. I just hate people like that and got pissed even reading about it. I forgot that most people are quite a bit more reasonable/sane than myself when I really get that angry. But take that part out, and realistically it's not bad advice at all.

RL really isn't doing anything wrong, so he has no reason not to just carry on as usual. You cannot let some meathead fuck try to scare you because really he's just an asshole and being in a public place it's not like he's really gonna do anything he's just flexing. And if he's really stupid enough to do it, if need be go ahead and defend yourself. Maybe not as hatefully and violent as I originally suggested, but mace or something should do the trick. Just be smart and don't allow yourself to get cornered by him. The guy would have to be a real deranged sociopath to harm you in public view after you remind him that you are in fact in public view and he is being the aggressor. If this guy really used to be a cop then he will obviously know that. And if he isn't he'll still hopefully have 2 brain cells to click together (one less than most cops but still enough to think) and realize when he's about to make a bad move that will get him in trouble.

Idk about you, but if I legitimately have done nothing wrong and I know that I am in a public place, I rarely fear other random people despite how aggressive they may act because it's usually all talk, and if the person you're dealing with really is that far from reality then it's obvious and you handle it accordingly. If someone does not act impulsively and attack you the first time, chances are that he's not gonna do anything. Usually random assaults are carried out by crazed individuals in the heat of the moment. Not by some dickhead trying to act tough.

Someone saying "don't ever let me see you here again" is usually an invitation to laugh in their face because at that point you know it's a textbook response from someone that's not gonna do shit. I'm pretty sure that I remember other BL discussions on that same exact same topic when someone has used that phrase.