homeydontplaythat
Bluelighter
FINALLY. After years of trying every SSRI, benzos, anti-psychotics, vistaril, tricylic ADs....and every single street drug. I am a recovering heroin addict. I have injected anything i can get my hands on from meth, coke, heroin, to adderall, buprenorphine, and everclear.
Opiates and benzodiazapines are what I loved simply because they took away my anxiety. I am on lexapro for anxiety and it does help but not enough and it BLUNTS THE FUCK out of my affect and emotions. I dont dip below baseline and freak out but I am numbed to feeling elated or much of any extreme emotion. I was going through some ROUGH shit though and it did help.
My life has stabalized from the horrors of addiction that include being raped, being homeless, being thrown off a 2 story building, and ODing several times (flatlined and died once and was brought back with defribillators). For some reason, just now I was able to discover lyrica.
Bluelight has been my main source of experiences with it and they have been so overwhelmingly glowing that I simply had to try it. My life is MOTHERFUCKING GREAT right now but anxiety still controls me to where I feel it affects the quality of my life for goddamn sure.
Today that came to an end
I got scripted 150 BID of Lyrica (Pregabalin) today. Came home and prepped 150mg of pregabalin and 1mg of buprenorphine. The effects of both drugs are such that IV use is not worth it. With bupe the BA is much higher though. Lyrica is 90% BA oral, but I didnt want to wait 2 hrs for effects. The solution was CRYSTAL clear as I used a wheel filter, so chill out.
About an hour later all my anxiety vanished into thin air. I was totally calm, sober, cognizant, and lucid. I was really happy with the results. I decided to take another 150 orally as to see if there would be a recreational potential at 300mg.
As soon as I ingested the second capsule I felt the first one kick in even more. I mean REALLY kicked in. I felt light, and had a body load. Very stable euphoria. No rush but definetly feeling AWESOME compared to how I normally feel. It felt really nice. I walked outside for a cigarette and found I didnt actually want one! So far this shit killed my anxiety without the retardation of benzos, generally improved my mood, and now I dont even want to smoke? Craziness.
I started walking and felt almost like I was floating. There was a subtle energy flowing through me that was mildly stimulating but I totally calm at the same time. I walked across the street and without thinking started hiking the trail 2.5mi to the top of the mountain. It felt GOOD to move my muscles. Eventually I stopped for a second and I got a rush of something almost psychedelic when I closed my eyes. It was pleasurable.
By the time I got to the top of the mountain and climbed the 6 story fire tower I was in a zen state. I meditated for about 30 mins and felt so utterly at peace it was unreal. I was so calm, so happy and EXTREMELY introspective. Thoughts started running through my mind yet I was able to address them and developed an inner dialogue with myself. I realized how much I love my life, my girl, myself. I was and still am incredibly happy with where I am in life. This has always been inside me but the lyrica made it so I could actually internalize what it meant. It was almost a spiritual experience.
The entire hike I took was almost life changing. I came to internalize so many things about myself that are normally hard to see from such a subjective position.
When I came back for dinner I felt like I was literally floating, so light, so free, totally at peace. I was able to make eye contact with people WITHOUT DISCOMFORT. Something that is very hard for me normally. Conversation was effortless, like it should be, when normally it is very awkward for me. I did develop cotton mouth about 2 hrs after dosing and I looked in the mirror to find my eyes getting red. The redness is probably related to the cotton mouth; drying of eyes and mouth.
All in all, this drug broke the shell that has contained my soul for so long. It is beautiful. That is the adjective I would use to describe how this drug works for anxiety. Supremely beautiful! I am so clear and comfortable. There is a mild buzz but it doesn't affect my cognition at all. It is mostly a body buzz. Mentally I am highly euphoric yet NOT intoxicated. It is wonderful. I am so happy I tried this drug. I will stop taking my lexapro and just use this and suboxone.
Lyrica BEATS THE SHIT out of benzos for anxiety. It is just as effective, if not more, and doesnt fuck you up, erase your memory, and there isnt an urge to re-dose/addictive qualities. Benzos were the only thing that took my anxiety away 100% but I couldnt help but abuse them. This pregabalin is totally different. Even as a recovering addict I feel comfortable taking this. I refused xanax at the appointment; I am not trying to get high. If i do get a buzz, great, but I needed to try this for my anxiety. IT RULES.
One thing that I did not like was that at one point coming down the mountain, the inner dialogue I had was SO FUCKING intense that I became uncomfortable at a point. I wanted to just chill and take in the scenery but I was fixated on this almost epiphany-esque concepts and situations that related to me. It was the most existential experience I have had. Basically really really deep shit, like how i identify/or do not with religion. How important it is to live life NOW as we will all die eventually. On and on.
I feel like the floodgates have been opened and I am able to think about important things that normally I wouldn't be able to address because I am so consumed with the awkward fear of being around people and even myself. All that shit just evaporated and I was able to see myself, my life, and SMILE AND LAUGH. The latter are other things I have a hard time doing.
This stuff really is the closest to a panacea I can fathom. It just killed the fear that has held me back from living my life. Anxiety is FUCKING GONE. I love this shit to death. No matter what happens I always want to have some in my med cabinet - an incredibly valuable tool for one that suffers from anxiety.
The side effects I experienced are as follows:
-red eyes
-cotton mouth
-HUNGER. My stomach started growling I got so hungry. FOOD TASTED LIKE AMBROSIA. Holy shit the lasagna and cake was like the best meal I have ever had. Even now, after dinner, I am still a bit hungry. I anticipate weight gain and having to fight against these urges. Shit.
-Slight visual disturbances. Mild CEV at this dose and even OEV with white walls.
-Typing was very easy and fluid yet I made so many more spelling mistakes than normal.
-Slightly off balance and generally kind of woozy/dizzy. Kind of nice though.
I highly suggest that anyone with anxiety try pregabalin. Fuck the benzos and try 300mg of lyrica. End of story.
Opiates and benzodiazapines are what I loved simply because they took away my anxiety. I am on lexapro for anxiety and it does help but not enough and it BLUNTS THE FUCK out of my affect and emotions. I dont dip below baseline and freak out but I am numbed to feeling elated or much of any extreme emotion. I was going through some ROUGH shit though and it did help.
My life has stabalized from the horrors of addiction that include being raped, being homeless, being thrown off a 2 story building, and ODing several times (flatlined and died once and was brought back with defribillators). For some reason, just now I was able to discover lyrica.
Bluelight has been my main source of experiences with it and they have been so overwhelmingly glowing that I simply had to try it. My life is MOTHERFUCKING GREAT right now but anxiety still controls me to where I feel it affects the quality of my life for goddamn sure.
Today that came to an end
I got scripted 150 BID of Lyrica (Pregabalin) today. Came home and prepped 150mg of pregabalin and 1mg of buprenorphine. The effects of both drugs are such that IV use is not worth it. With bupe the BA is much higher though. Lyrica is 90% BA oral, but I didnt want to wait 2 hrs for effects. The solution was CRYSTAL clear as I used a wheel filter, so chill out.
About an hour later all my anxiety vanished into thin air. I was totally calm, sober, cognizant, and lucid. I was really happy with the results. I decided to take another 150 orally as to see if there would be a recreational potential at 300mg.
As soon as I ingested the second capsule I felt the first one kick in even more. I mean REALLY kicked in. I felt light, and had a body load. Very stable euphoria. No rush but definetly feeling AWESOME compared to how I normally feel. It felt really nice. I walked outside for a cigarette and found I didnt actually want one! So far this shit killed my anxiety without the retardation of benzos, generally improved my mood, and now I dont even want to smoke? Craziness.
I started walking and felt almost like I was floating. There was a subtle energy flowing through me that was mildly stimulating but I totally calm at the same time. I walked across the street and without thinking started hiking the trail 2.5mi to the top of the mountain. It felt GOOD to move my muscles. Eventually I stopped for a second and I got a rush of something almost psychedelic when I closed my eyes. It was pleasurable.
By the time I got to the top of the mountain and climbed the 6 story fire tower I was in a zen state. I meditated for about 30 mins and felt so utterly at peace it was unreal. I was so calm, so happy and EXTREMELY introspective. Thoughts started running through my mind yet I was able to address them and developed an inner dialogue with myself. I realized how much I love my life, my girl, myself. I was and still am incredibly happy with where I am in life. This has always been inside me but the lyrica made it so I could actually internalize what it meant. It was almost a spiritual experience.
The entire hike I took was almost life changing. I came to internalize so many things about myself that are normally hard to see from such a subjective position.
When I came back for dinner I felt like I was literally floating, so light, so free, totally at peace. I was able to make eye contact with people WITHOUT DISCOMFORT. Something that is very hard for me normally. Conversation was effortless, like it should be, when normally it is very awkward for me. I did develop cotton mouth about 2 hrs after dosing and I looked in the mirror to find my eyes getting red. The redness is probably related to the cotton mouth; drying of eyes and mouth.
All in all, this drug broke the shell that has contained my soul for so long. It is beautiful. That is the adjective I would use to describe how this drug works for anxiety. Supremely beautiful! I am so clear and comfortable. There is a mild buzz but it doesn't affect my cognition at all. It is mostly a body buzz. Mentally I am highly euphoric yet NOT intoxicated. It is wonderful. I am so happy I tried this drug. I will stop taking my lexapro and just use this and suboxone.
Lyrica BEATS THE SHIT out of benzos for anxiety. It is just as effective, if not more, and doesnt fuck you up, erase your memory, and there isnt an urge to re-dose/addictive qualities. Benzos were the only thing that took my anxiety away 100% but I couldnt help but abuse them. This pregabalin is totally different. Even as a recovering addict I feel comfortable taking this. I refused xanax at the appointment; I am not trying to get high. If i do get a buzz, great, but I needed to try this for my anxiety. IT RULES.
One thing that I did not like was that at one point coming down the mountain, the inner dialogue I had was SO FUCKING intense that I became uncomfortable at a point. I wanted to just chill and take in the scenery but I was fixated on this almost epiphany-esque concepts and situations that related to me. It was the most existential experience I have had. Basically really really deep shit, like how i identify/or do not with religion. How important it is to live life NOW as we will all die eventually. On and on.
I feel like the floodgates have been opened and I am able to think about important things that normally I wouldn't be able to address because I am so consumed with the awkward fear of being around people and even myself. All that shit just evaporated and I was able to see myself, my life, and SMILE AND LAUGH. The latter are other things I have a hard time doing.
This stuff really is the closest to a panacea I can fathom. It just killed the fear that has held me back from living my life. Anxiety is FUCKING GONE. I love this shit to death. No matter what happens I always want to have some in my med cabinet - an incredibly valuable tool for one that suffers from anxiety.
The side effects I experienced are as follows:
-red eyes
-cotton mouth
-HUNGER. My stomach started growling I got so hungry. FOOD TASTED LIKE AMBROSIA. Holy shit the lasagna and cake was like the best meal I have ever had. Even now, after dinner, I am still a bit hungry. I anticipate weight gain and having to fight against these urges. Shit.
-Slight visual disturbances. Mild CEV at this dose and even OEV with white walls.
-Typing was very easy and fluid yet I made so many more spelling mistakes than normal.
-Slightly off balance and generally kind of woozy/dizzy. Kind of nice though.
I highly suggest that anyone with anxiety try pregabalin. Fuck the benzos and try 300mg of lyrica. End of story.
