Preach

[Baker]

I haven't quite worked out what to do with these words yet, but this is just a train of thought I just had, and decided to get out of my system. Still a draft... still some helpful critiquing could be useful. Hope those who read this enjoy it. Thanks



Pioneering onto paper
preaching words like a dj preaches music
I put these words on to paper
but I didn't pioneer language
A dj doesn't make music and neither does a producer
but they find the sounds to show us the beauty that sounds can create
In a universe based around communication
seems pretty silly to place so much emphasis on Jesus
The dj of evolution, he explained what peace, love, and unity are all about
When sin is subjective to the individual
We can all essentially be the son and daughters of christ
I like to think of myself as a dj,
To show individuals the beauty of freedom of thought.
I don't want respect, but if you are to crucify me for what I said
Respect is exactly what i'll get.
As crucifiction is controversial
In a universe based around communication
Controversy is like our currency,
immortalizing ourselves in a history that is constantly ending.
Time is useless, so why place emphasis on dates, the past or the future.
Theres no such thing as Right now, because defining it
means that you don't understand it

How can one be sinless when sin is subjective
Is subjectivity sinful
Emphasise your religion with conviction
but don't forget to be open to the possibilities of anything
as preaching teaches
feeding someone food for thought, only feeds their ego for a moment
For a true teacher influences someone to think when one is no longer around
So why respect Jesus for his conviction,
hen it was what has come from him that was his true impact.
It wasn't he who made the impact, but the recognition we gave him.

Our world is filled with laws
but these laws don't really exist, as anyone has the right to do whatever they want
though what it comes down to, is that although we may be free to do whatever we want,
so are other people
and if a police officer is to arrest you, it is their right.
Not because of any political law,
but because anyone is free to do whatever they want.
If you want to avenge someones death, or do what you want to anyone you want then fine
but be aware that anyone else is free to do whatever they want too.
Sin is subjective, so if you perform an act that you don't believe is a sin,
be prepared to be crucified by someone who views the world differently.

 

[(Wordy)]

There are plenty of interesting, interrelated ideas floating around here... I'd definitely keep working on it if I were you, and try to figure out some ways of showing some of these ideas through story, situation, example, etc.

I love the way you've phrased some of your ideas too:

Pioneering onto paper
preaching words like a dj preaches music

Controversy is like our currency,
immortalizing ourselves in a history that is constantly ending.

Your view of "rights" is pretty radical. No doubt it would be seen as controversial to people across a broad range of political persuasions. Have you done much reading on rights, ethics, moral philosophy? If not, perhaps you could consider doing some as research for this poem? It's great to flesh out your own thoughts in a creative way like you have, but if you do some background reading on the topic, at least you'll be able to see where your views fit into the spectrum. And it'll help you to make your arguments more convincing, if that's what you're aiming for.

 

[Baker]

I have done a fair bit of reading on rights, ethics, moral philosophy, I studied it at uni in philosophy. While on that note though, my train of thought was supposed to be of no certain train of thought, but merely suggestive that anything is possible and it is in fact defining and trying to understand things that seperates us from the truth.

For the 3rd paragraph is just discussing the fact that we have no boundaries, we can do whatever we want, though we choose not to. It's like a determinist suggests, if we have no control over our actions, then we must have something that influences us to make the choices we make. This poem was more assessing the realization that anything is possible. If you want to break out of jail, then go ahead, you're free to do what you want, just be aware that there may be repurcussions. I don't say our legal policies are correct, but we as living beings are capable of defying them just the same. The only thing that segregates legal policies and my own point of view, is the collective view. Many believe I should be punished for certain actions, and it's their right to have those views, just like it is my right to want to defy them, or teach them otherwise.

Brazil is a very interesting country, there is hardly any enforcement of law and so tourists often feel threatened. So under the views of moral rights, the individual in Brazil may see it as there right to be able to steal from that person as they have more money then the theif. Though there because there is no law enforcement, you are virtually free to do whatever you want, and my contemplation was merely based around the freedom one can have. Whether or not your actions may lead to incrimination or not is another story. My words didn't have much to do with various stances on morals, but instead freedom. You have the right to do whatever you want in life, and because you have this right, so does everyone else.

Ahhh, we are free to do what we choose... but do we really choose what we want, determinism and fate may play their part here in a philosophical discussion. I may want to kill someone, but because of the negative implications of it, I may choose not to (depending on what stance you take), because it doesn't benefit my life, because it will make me feel bad, or because i'm worreid about impacting other peoples lives. I to be honest, don't have a perspective on morals, and I think i'd consider myself a skeptic and question whether even universal morals even exist. Though I do believe in Nirvana somewhat... The purpose of my poem was to suggest that if you don't believe in what you do, it may make you feel guilty and so that's a bad feeling and brings you further away from nirvana. If everything you do is selfless, you remain unattached to everything, then essentially you aren't doing yourself harm.. Unless you think you're doing harm. Hence psychopaths who may not even think twice about killing someone.

My arguement, was purely a simple realisation, but none-the-less a significant one.