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Polyamory!

The image you gave me of dripping jism was revolting, and here I was surfing /b/ while eating with no issues before reading that. eeew.

I dunno twentysix, I've done the whole poly thing for sometime now with no STDs and no forming babby. Condoms work very well and I don't see how they are unhealthy.

Nor does polyamory as a concept require having sex with people who are untested, with people who are not on birth control, or for that matter, in a way that could even end up with pregnancy. (I.e. gay/lesbian are not precluded from the concept) The issues you address are mainly a matter of implementation rather than conceptual.
 
But whenever I was in monogamous relationships and had a crush on someone I'd be obsessed thinking what it would be like to sleep with them, and because I wasn't allowed to do it it actually became much more of an issue in my head.
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Ha! I do this A LOT with a lot of men. I've been like that since I was 20. I've had dreams about some of them out of nowhere. The other night I dreamed of an old boss. It was odd, because I haven't seen the guy in about 4 years.

I always think -- If only these men knew that I'd be down with having a fling for a night. LOL The weird thing is that they aren't always the buff, good-looking types. I've realized I am sexually attracted to confidence, success and power. I guess that's like most women, but my taste in men is odd.
 
Busty St Clare said:
No matter how accepting you and your multiple partners are, your children will never understand why you can't commit to just one person.
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I guess that's why I'd be down for it, I don't want to have children.
Do any Poly people have children? What do you think about it?
I'm curious as to how it would work, would the children think of all the adults involved as their parents?
 
^
Monogamy is not my thing, but hey, as you said, to each their own. Except I never see poly people attacking mono people as being immoral, sinful, unnatural, or immature 'sluts'. But me and my partners have been accused of all that. Not that you or all mono people do that, but a non trivial portion of mono people do discriminate against poly people. ( and never mind the vitriol tossed at people into kink... triple for me as a kinky poly who is a male in a 'manly' occupation and is a sub.) Remember folks, someone w more then one S/O and likes stuff w rope and cuffs etc, is still a human, and is not hurting anyone, nor making you partake. So no need for hostility.

Not directed at you tude, just reminded me of something so I got on soap box, lol.
 
rangrz said:
Rangrz reporting for duty!

This has always been how I conducted my love life. It just feels more "right" to me, because I can not help whom I love. If I happen to love someone and I deny that, all I am doing is being intellectually dishonest to myself, if I deny it to a girl I love, I am being dishonest to her too.

So, I've stuck with the poly concept as it is far easier. I mean right now, I have one MAIN S/O who I live with and hang out with like ALL the time...but not because I am "forced" to, it's because she is fucking super amazing and made of pure epic win.

Never the less, I do have feelings of love a few other girls, and my main S/O is cool with that (and she has her own other relationship with some girl)

two of the other girls, I am sexual with, and open about the fact I am poly, and they are cool with it. The other two, I am not, because one is kind of into the poly idea, but her BF is not, and she loves him enough to stay mono with him. The other one I am not, because, well, I don't see her very often as she lives very far away but travels a lot to where I live..and I guess we are technically sexual when she is here, but I still hold an intimate emotional relationship when she is not. lolol LDRs are kinda sucky.

To me, possession of someone is logically disjunctioned from love for someone. How can you claim to love someone when you wish to own their body and their very consciousness? It sounds wrong to me.

return 0
end
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dude your function returned a nice fat string, or an array of chars, which ever you prefer, but definitely didn't return nothing haha. :)
 
Polyamory is a hard thing to live and practice without some pain. I believe this is because we are most often socially conditioned to believe monogamy is the one and only way.

I don't believe that is the case. I do however believe that monogamy serves a very real positive social function for those that wish to cement a bond with another. The reasons for cementing that bond vary, but monogamy very often simplifies the rules for play.

I also believe that the ever increasing long term life expectancy of many in the most wealthy and technologically advanced nation states has forced or is forcing a paradigm shift in pair bonding based soley on procreation.

Maybe polyamory is natural, but it sure isn't practical or possible for most straight laced folks in our day and age.
 
Define 'straight laced". Aside from the drug use, which generally no one knows about, me, my main S/O and my other partners are probably the poster boys/girls for straight laced.
 
That is a digression at best.

I mean straight laced in the sense that everything should show properly to all those concerned and invested in a certain mindset. Nevermind that peticular socially conscious and socially bound mindset has been imposed on many--if not most--from a very young age.
 
I'm talking about being straight laced 24/7. I'm not talking about projecting an acceptable social image.

:)
 
rangrz said:
To me, possession of someone is logically disjunctioned from love for someone. How can you claim to love someone when you wish to own their body and their very consciousness? It sounds wrong to me.
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Precisely the point I was trying to make throughout my entire last relationship :! :! :!

Possession is tantamount to not being able to respect someone as an individual in my view. It's curtailing their freedom of expression, namely of being able to share themselves with whomever they see fit.

Moreover, people who are given their freedom are generally more disinclined to use it. But they must always be afforded the option. :\
 
rangrz said:
^
Monogamy is not my thing, but hey, as you said, to each their own. Except I never see poly people attacking mono people as being immoral, sinful, unnatural, or immature 'sluts'. But me and my partners have been accused of all that. Not that you or all mono people do that, but a non trivial portion of mono people do discriminate against poly people. ( and never mind the vitriol tossed at people into kink... triple for me as a kinky poly who is a male in a 'manly' occupation and is a sub.) Remember folks, someone w more then one S/O and likes stuff w rope and cuffs etc, is still a human, and is not hurting anyone, nor making you partake. So no need for hostility.

Not directed at you tude, just reminded me of something so I got on soap box, lol.
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I understand what you're saying, and I 100% agree.
 
very interesting thread! m glad i found it...

ive been recently proposed to be part of such a relationship... its all a rather long story...
im attracted to the idea of it all. ive been feeling like this for most of my adult life. i cant help but fall in lvoe and maintain my love for some of the girls and women in my life. its strange, but ive always felt like it would all be better if they understood me and allowed me to be in love with as many as i could or wanted.

but to them, the s/o, its all threatning. with my demanding job i have little time for anything else, myself or her included. i think one of the main reasons she would reject the idea instantly would be because it would mean spending some time away from her, and letting her feel neglected. which would probably be true.

but then, its a bit wrong to think that love=time spent together. how many nights have i spent sleeping next to someone, tired after a days work. how much does it mean to the other person that i am just there, even if not there for them?

strange beings we are
 
i don't think there's anything wrong with poly people, and it makes sense. it just doesn't work for me, because sex is and isn't that important to me...i don't think it's about owning their body. sex isn't so great to me that i need to have different experiences with different people in order to keep it interesting or the best or whatever. it's just a bodily function, really. base. not that important.

on the other hand, when i do have sex with a boyfriend i want us to only be doing it together, because it's a private thing to me. it's a private, but shared thing and that's what makes it good or important. otherwise i could just use my hand.
 
All I have to add here is that polyamoury is fucking great.

You can be friends with benefits. And your friends who are very dear to you know that you are sleeping with other people and making wise choices too. Seriously it takes all feelings of guilt away from feeling the urge to share sex with more than one person.

However - instead of sharing so much of yourself with too many people, the only thing I can suggest is keeping it to a up to a handful, and just experimenting with each of them more instead of looking for more partners. Otherwise the limits you can get to with each are pretty limited, and not quite so special.
 
...workin on it.

I might need to find a proper American enclave to flock to.

:)
 
I only ever have polyamorus relationships.
I grew up In an environment where it was very common.My father, step mother and all of my brothers
have been in this kind of partnership. Personally I think you need to have respect for each other and a set of rules and limits that you both agree with.
But in the end some people can have these relationships successfully and some can't.
I'm the kind of person that doesn't get jealous. The way I think about it is I my companion can make me feel this good about my self, and I can do the same for them. why not share the love??



But I found with a lot of polyamourus people once they become elderly they do find that life time companion.
Not in a committed marriage sort of way but a friend for life.
 
I'm all for it, in theory.

My last, serious (and I suppose, by my standards, long term) relationship was with someone who (professed to be, at least) the pillar of monogamy... I guess I'm still waiting for these energies to be expelled from my body/psyche...certainly haven't been my free-lovin' self since that fell by the wayside. ho hum.

more power to those people who are in a committed, yet polyamorous union. such a rarity in this day and age! I personally believe that the greatest heights of respect and trust could be achieved in such a relationship, should one (or two!) be so lucky. <3
 
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