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Poem

i enjoyed your work. It is subversive in that your using poetry contrivances in order to convey humor but you do it well. Especially the first one. I look forward to reading more of your work.
 
Remembering Tom (MTGG - see BL shrine)

I was drinking a pint with my mate Tom,
In a pub down on Gatley Place,
He said 'I spend my money on wine, women and song',
All the rest I waste...
 
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Well i saw Fizzy Sipworth last saturday night
And her eyes seemed to blaze with a wonderful light
I said "Fizzy my darling you look simply devine"
She said "You would to, if you'd just had a line"

Simply everyone is doing cocaine,

bus drivers are tooting it
jockeys are hoofing it
dj's are spinning it
gamblers are winning it
forces manouvering it
cleaners are hoovering it
models are booked on it
anglers are hooked on it
pensioners drawing it
footballers scoring it
it seems that it's simple
there's no-one to blame
for the whole of the nation
is taking cocaine

Well I saw Aunty Milly
In last seasons clothes
She said car, house and yacht
Had gone straight up her nose
But she'd had the most wonderful time
And the whole thing
Seemed simply sublime
I said Milly my dear
You'll be dead at this rate
"Not at all" parried she
"For I've just had a plate
Made of metal put into my nose"
Now she's hoovering it up like a hose

Simply everyone is doing cocaine

bus drivers are tooting it
jockeys are hoofing it
dj's are spinning it
gamblers are winning it
forces manouvering it
cleaners are hoovering it
models are booked on it
anglers are hooked on it
pensioners drawing it
footballers scoring it
it seems that it's simple
there's no-one to blame
for the whole of the nation
is taking cocaine

Well I saw Uncle Berty he danced on the table
I said "Berty you're past it and surely not able"
"Precisely my boy, I am past eighty three
And you would dance just the same if you'd hoofed a whole 'G'
Of Columbian straight from the rock"
But his death was no terrible shock
So, off to the funeral, off to the wake
We were all in an under exuberant state
'Til the point things were so dead at twenty past nine
Aunty Milly said cheekily "let's have a line"
And we all shouted hip hip hooray!

Simply everyone's taking cocaine.

M.L.Young
 
Someone once asked me 'why don't you take cocaine?'
I replied 'The world has far to many game show hosts already'
 
Art/Blank Verse

IN A SMALL ROOM A PICTURE HANGS ON THE WALL.
I SIT ON A CHAIR TO SEE WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT.
 
Clutching at Straws

All my life I've wanted to live in a pad,
And I've ended up living in a gaff,
I'd love to tidy up,
But I can't tell junk from clutter,

So, in spite of my bonsai bank balance,
I often go for a Tizer slammer or a low-interest lager,
With my manager, Tom Pity,
Who I met at a work shy, workshop in Worksop,

Former lead-swinger at a muckel manufacturing company,
He now works for a solicitor,
Royle, Boil, Foyle, Hoyle & Doyle,
It's about as much fun as a millipede with verrucas,

As luck would have it,
The 3 nearest pubs are named after dental treatment,
There's The Crown, The Bridge,
And the one with the plaque outside.

The owners of the bridge actively discourage the overweight,
And employ a chubby checker on the door,
So I breathe in for a few minutes,
It takes ages getting served,
The beer is brewed on the premises; to order,

Tonight theres an engagement party in full swing,
Carmen the shamen is marrying the barman,
So we do the hokey-cokey,
Round a croaky karaoke,

Standing by the pistachio dispenser,Every other Saturday,
Is temperamental, sentimental Naterlie Slattery,
Queen of the comely anatomy category,
Latterly acting cattery to flattery,

Tried to impress her with inane football trivia,
You could cut the atmosphere with,
specialist atmosphere cutting equipment,
Or something of the like

She's on her high horse, on high moral ground,
Floating in virtually fat-free reality,
I'm as auquard as a comedian dying on stage,
With all the audience wearing their trousers as half mask,

Well we all make mistakes,
Like the DJ at my cousins wedding who,
played 'You've lost that loving feeling',
For the young couple to smooch to,

I'm on my last legs,
And I didn't even like the first ones,
I should go home and watch a documentry about sleep,
But instead stay and drink like a fish who thinks that prohibition is about to be introduced,

The perils of the Rock & Roll lifestyle,
I'll never forget the time I ran out of milk And had to use Marvel,
It's about here I begin to loose the tread,
But never mind,

My mates got a warehouse full of cotton,
Apparently, it's all part of lifes rich patistry
 
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I would appreciate criticism on these works. I'm from Lancashire which is in North Wast England so some words may not sound right because of my inflection. I hope, by dint of explaination, I will allow everyone to see what's going on.
I' sad that nobody took up the Julian Cope lyrics taken from a letter sent by Freud. I would like to know others who have read Freud & Especially Jung.
 
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Lucy In The Sky With Hummus

You've got black forest lips,
You've got vol a vent hips,
You've got two chicken drumsticks for thighs,
The first time I saw you I thought 'total'e'chips'
You've got Bride on her wedding night eyes,

Your eyebrows, are the pop up toasters,
Cheeks the cups with matching coasters,
Heard the Sargent. Pepper poster,
Has taken us all by surprise,

The best man's Jim Petty,
The bridesmade's called betty,
The usual dress code applies,
Peter Bernetti can't catch the confetti,
Though his hands are too sweaty he tries,

Champagne corks pop on the wild serongetti,
You've got bride on her wedding night eyes,

The wedding frock, is gingham red,
The disco Jackie Wilson said,
'The groom is whisked off to the marital bed,
With his suit-pockets filled with whizz pies,

And whishing he'd root, for the haddock in bread,
But it's hard to find suits in that size,
The first time I saw you, the wedding bells rang,
You've got bride on her wedding night eyes,


'Well what about living together?' I shouted as I got of the bus'
 
haribo1 said:
BL Poetry

In this place,
Bad poetry abounds,
It all seems deep and meaningless,
But we all use clever sounds

Bad poetry is easy,
It's simple but it's poor
This poor bard has read a lot,
but cannot take no more.

To make a rhyme is easy,
To make it scan not hard,
To read the angst on BL,
Has left me on my guard

I could try to be clever and respond in poetic form. But, I don't put on pretence of being clever, merely one of being an asshole. I’m not a poet. I’m a writer. For the most part I don’t like to put my stories on here. I merely post when I have something to say that I want to share through poetry. There are a million poetry forums out there where you can perform a circle hand-job about each other’s work and critique and argue and workshop and give more pretentious hand-jobs until you’re blue in the face (or blew in the face), but this is about sharing words with people that can empathise with what you’re feeling or going through. Try not to be a jerk off about peoples feelings (save it for other forums).
 
^Your quite right, I have now posted a thread concrning the specific subject of Teenage Angst in poetry. My writing is no better than average, so your clearly better than me in this field.
Shall I simply remove it? It was, after all, ill-concieved but what is done is done. I spent a LOOONNNG time looking at other peoples work before making that somewhat trite, and worse still POOR, ditty.
Thankyou for being so forthright. Criticism is a vital part of improving ones art.

Sean
 
Considering Slough, Berkshire 1

This town makes me vomit,
I wish they would bomb it

Considering Slough, Berkshire 2

Come happy bombs and rain on Slough,
It isn't fit for humans now


J.Bechanam
 
Concussion

the psycho in his rubber gloves
came round with the boys
he said “if music be the food of love
what's this fucking noise”
a mauler clamped around my wrist
with knuckles white as lard
he hit the hi-fi with his fist
it fell apart in shards
they were drinking all my vodka down
like low life vicious drunks
I wanna be a man about town
but not in little chunks
I ought to be more manly
and stand up for myself
but blood runs in my family
and I wouldn't have it anywhere else
liquid cosh a chemical pain
here comes the ground
it's thanks to the finest medical brains
I'm even around
the video went for a burton
the guys just fell about
when I said “please don't slam the curtains
and take the front door out”
what happened next is kind-of blurred
confusion took control
all I heard was a dirty word
my eyes began to roll
the light went out one step beyond
there's nothing left to see
my name comes up I can't respond
not even for a fee
there was no homicide
this much was ascertained
- oh no! I never died
but what of life remained
 
A friend o mine used to go into the supermarket, pick up a litre bottle of lemonade then drink it walking around the shop, finally collecting the deposit on the way out...

There Goes Frugal Dougal

Careful punter,
Market Lead,
Bargin Hunter,
Born and bred,

Each Night before I go to sleep,
I always count discounted sheep,

Why buy a thing when you can wait,
Until it's reached it's sell by date

Chicken Tikka, Pilau rice,
Tastes good and cheap at half the price,

Chicken Tikka, you and I know,
I've no intent to thwart the flab,
Fill baskets with,
All I could Grab,

Can I take it to the fridge?

Go ahead, take it to the fridge,

I used to think I loved her,
Then I wasn't sure,
I took a pack of sausages,
And bolted for the door,

Just telephone me after six,
You'll get to know the score,

There must be...
Thrifty ways to leave your lover...
 
The Little Things in Life
Too often we don't realize,
What we have until it's gone.
Too often we wait too late to say,
"I'm sorry I was wrong."
Sometimes it seems we hurt those,
Held dearest to our hearts.
And allow small,stupid things,
To tear our lives apart.
Far too many times we've let
Wrong thoughts in our minds.
But then it's usually too late,
To see what made us blind.
So be sure that you let people know,
How much they mean to you.
Take the time to say the words,
Before you're time is through.
Be sure that you appreciate
All of what you've got,
And be thankful for the little things
In life, that mean a lot.
 
Very, very true & it's something I'm living through right now :(

All things will pass,
All flesh is grass

S.Smith
 
If there were no eternal consciousness in a man, if at the foundation of all there lay only a wildly seething power which writhing with obscure passions produced everything that is great and everything that is insignificant, if a bottomless void never satiated lay hidden beneath all -- what then would life be but despair?

S. Kirkegaard

As an agnostic, I feel these words to be true (Kerkegaard was a christian).
 
^Hence Satre with Nausea (which I hated, because I didn't WANT it to be true, but sad to say, I think IS true...
 
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