I came in here to check out Pagey's mod-style but looks like I can contribute a bit here with my own experience! Pagey will recognise the story
(Pagey I'm not really scrutinisng you at all, you just reminded me it can be interesting in here
)
I'm a guy. I was with my ex for about ten years. There was a lot behind our breakup. I broke up with her. I still loved her but my head was full of resentment at her as she'd done things that I thought I couldn't forgive. We kept in touch and had sex a fair bit after "breaking up". Eventually things in my life came to a head and I quit my job and moved to another city. I thought I needed a clean start and that I would meet people and maybe a new girlfriend.
Well I did make friends, and got decent jobs. I have a hard time approaching women, but there were a few women I was interested in and did flirt with, but it always turned out they were all in relationships. I know, I met the boyfriends and fiancés. I met one girl who was into me and we kissed but I was fucked on drugs and I thought I made a tit of myself, so I didn't meet her again.
My ex moved to the same city six months after me. That freaked me out a bit. But I still loved her deep down, so we spent time together and eventually - after a couple of years - she moved in with me and my housemates. At that point I had pretty much stopped all the obsessive thoughts that had made it so difficult to be with her, but I was still in my head thinking I needed a fresh start. I ended up moving again, somewhere where she wouldn't want to follow me! A campsite in the middle of nowhere living in a motor-home. I was there for a year before I decided I'd had enough so I moved back home.
By this time I really wanted to get back together with her, I'd forgiven all her "sins" and I wanted to settle down with her and have a family. But she'd got fed up with me and my antics and had decided she didn't want a family! And now she's getting a bit old to do that, she's 46 (I'm 40).
So I'm stuck here in love with the woman who chased me across the country, but she's not interested in me any more. Odd thing is it doesn't bother me much! We're still friends and it's fine to meet up with her and do something fun, and yet know that we'll be saying goodbye and going to our separate homes. I do still love her and I'm sure she still loves me but we've been through so much and she's probably scared of getting hurt yet again (she'd had a rough time in relationships before meeting me, which contributed to our problems).
But long this post isn't it? Stims
All to say, sometimes a break up is required to let the past become the past, and after that has happened it might be possible to get back together again, but the break up has to be long enough for it to work its magic. So that could take a lot of patience on your part.
