please help scared

[twitchy_15]

hey, around december i took some mdma with friends, not tested we'd been having very crappy stuff around that time. the first pill was really good but after the 2nd , then took a half and another.

my jaw was bobbing up and down everytime i opened my mouth without control, i couldnt pee for hours (4-8 + ) it became very scary

and then the next day could barely talk because my mouth had sores all over it i have no idea why... maybe from biting but i didn't feel like i did but i was also high.

2-3 days after i was very very depressed ive done mdma before but i literally was in tears feeling like whats the point of living anymore. for a week and half i felt totally lost did not feel like myself or normal i also couldnt eat for a week due to the sores.

2-3 days after i also had a very severe panic attack felt like i was going to die, went to the hospital and after being there for 6-8 hrs they told me nothing so i ended up leaving at 4 am... i was very scared and poor hospital service made it worse. around that time i had probably 5 bad panic attacks but the first was by far the worst.

now its march and mostly at work ive been getting weird feelings around my heart like chest pressure or something like ive felt during panic attacks .. but lately i just get the feeling and besides that feel normal.

just the last hour i got this but a full blown panic attack which again was scary .

is it possible im going to keep experiencing this? should i go to the doctor ? will the effects from doing drugs eventually go away?

my memory is still not great and something i did 2 days ago feels like 3 weeks ago.

i want to feel normal again

 

[twitchy_15]

i also just read that caffeine can contribute to it, today had 4 coffees and a tims ice capp.. so maybe thats why

but i never use to so am i more prone to it due to that bad drug experience

 

[stardust.hero]

What you may be experience is a panic attack. Some may have more elaborate and centralized names like PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and HPPD (hallucinogen persisting perception disorder), and those are just to name a few. I know that following some heavy stimulant binges I experienced chest pressure. It literally felt like I was having a heart attack with numb chest/skin, arms going numb, chest pain, the whole works. I was 100% convinced I was having a heart attack. I was chewing down bayer aspirins like there was no tomorrow.

This isn't to say you should dismiss these feelings as being unimportant. You should get to the bottom of the problem. Your body is telling you something is wrong. But don't hesitate to look in the direction of it being a mental fault (such as panic).

 

[twitchy_15]

^ yeah ive definitely been scared / feeling like im gunna have a heart attack, i havn't drank or done drugs since december and ill never do drugs again .. really scary

 

[stardust.hero]

I can definitely identify with that. You really should get yourself checked out. Seriously.

For me, after one particularly taxing time while on a drug I experienced this chest feeling for the first time. During the experience I believed I was dying/having a heart attack, it lasted a while and for the first time I believed I would need to go to the hospital. I was convinced my heart was seconds away from seizing up. I managed to get through the experience but since that day I have had bouts of panic, induced by something or another not necessarily drug related and I get the same chest feeling. I have done some research and although I have no medical knowledge my symptoms match very closely to post traumatic stress disorder which basically what I get from it is: individuals with PTSD after having a particularly traumatizing experience can have extremely vivid flashbacks and believe what is going on is really going on. (In terms of feelings and emotions.) In my case feeling that numb chest heart attack feeling.

If this is a persistent problem that is interfering with your daily life for an extended period of time and doctors aren't finding physical symptoms I would look in that direction.

 

[carl0s]

hey, around december i took some mdma with friends, not tested we'd been having very crappy stuff around that time. the first pill was really good but after the 2nd , then took a half and another.

my jaw was bobbing up and down everytime i opened my mouth without control, i couldnt pee for hours (4-8 + ) it became very scary

and then the next day could barely talk because my mouth had sores all over it i have no idea why... maybe from biting but i didn't feel like i did but i was also high.

2-3 days after i was very very depressed ive done mdma before but i literally was in tears feeling like whats the point of living anymore. for a week and half i felt totally lost did not feel like myself or normal i also couldnt eat for a week due to the sores.

2-3 days after i also had a very severe panic attack felt like i was going to die, went to the hospital and after being there for 6-8 hrs they told me nothing so i ended up leaving at 4 am... i was very scared and poor hospital service made it worse. around that time i had probably 5 bad panic attacks but the first was by far the worst.

now its march and mostly at work ive been getting weird feelings around my heart like chest pressure or something like ive felt during panic attacks .. but lately i just get the feeling and besides that feel normal.

just the last hour i got this but a full blown panic attack which again was scary .

is it possible im going to keep experiencing this? should i go to the doctor ? will the effects from doing drugs eventually go away?

my memory is still not great and something i did 2 days ago feels like 3 weeks ago.

i want to feel normal again

Chewed up tongue, swolen lips due to chewed-up inside-lips/gums, is quite normal if you've had a lot. I look like a black man after heavy MDMA use, and I can barely eat :D

Jaw clenching is typical too.

The panic stuff, well, if it's been that long (3 months), then you could do with some assistance - a bit of a crutch (meds) or some help with getting your mind over it - a different routine, maybe try to go places with people rather than by yourself for a bit.. they don't have to know why you want to go along with them.

Regarding meds, you could look into having a beta blocker on hand, if you're not asthmatic. I am asthmatic and I still used some inderal. I'm not sure it helped that much though. I found 5/mg/evening valium to help but *benzos are very addictive and make you 10x worse when you try to stop taking them after a month or two*.
The only way I have fixed general anxierty issues in the past has been through anti-depressants - venlafaxine. A year on them, then come off them (not nice but only a few days of brain shocks), and all is well. This time around though I am finding the venlafaxine makes me very anxious so that's no good.

Try some hard exercise.