~EnChAnTeD_DrEaMz~
Greenlighter
Hiya i am in some serious need of
Any advice, serious advice would be greatly appreciated. Its long, im scared and confused and messed up but please if you have the time, i really would appreciate some advice.
I suffer from a series of serious mental health issues. Until now, i have been to strong for to long, and recently sort help, and stuck to it, not just medicating my medications so to speak. I have a interim diagnosis of Bi-polar disorder and Borderline Personality disorder, And confirmed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Severe Anxiety.
I have been on many medications, since my suicide attempts in 08/09 but have never had seen a pyschologist for more then one sessions, or a pyschatrist unless it was at the hospital after attempting suicide.
My GP just seems to had out what medications i want, so i would walk out with valium xanax, alepam and mogadon. As well as Tramal 50's and authority for 100 200mg SR tramal.
Ive been on the two tramal now for almost seven years, with only a ten month break, whilst pregnant.
I dont take it everyday, but i will take it to get high, and ill take anywhere between 6-10 200mgs at one dose..
I am on effexor XR 300 mg and seraquil 100mg i hate seraquil i use to abuse it along with zyprexa to make be feel numb three years ago but now regular doseage of the seraquil fucks my head makes me all cloudy in the morning. So i stopped usage of the seraquil about a month ago. I have been seeing the same GP at the same clinic for a good half of my life.
This year my depression has sunk to a alltime low again and i broke up with my long time significant other, i relapsed and started abusing my xanax and valium. And the alepam, i have a bad dental problem and often get oxycodone for it, i attempted suicide at the start of the year. By over doseing and i am literally lucky to be alive, i had 40 endone and 60 alepam, it wasnt premeditated. it just happened.
I self harmed for the first time in 11 years since i was sexually assulted as a teenager.
After all of this my GP continues to prescribe these medications. 5 months later a patient died of hers involving xanax valium sleeping tablets and oxycodone/oxycontin dont know if this patient is on all of them, or which one it was she just said she wont be prescribing them to me anymore due to her being on the name of the drugs that he O'd on
She has left on leave and will be back at the end of the month where i will be seeing her for my dental care plan to be finished.
no other dr will prescribe me my medications because they say its a lethal cocktail, so ive been un medicated,
I am seeing a pyschatrist on friday, and i dont know what to say to him.
My effexor isnt working, im IV using my valium and xanax and went thru 50 of each in 3 days. Ive also started to IV the oxycontin and am about to have my last one. Ive never IV'd before it started 2 months ago with valium and xanax, and then i stopped, a wk later life became hard,relapsed and i havent stopped. I cant get my repeats filled because they were only done 5 days ago for my xanax.
I have no Oxy's left for my pain, and ive been on them pretty much flat out for 24 days now with severe dental pain :'( I wish i never made the decision to IV and i am disgusted in myself for doing so. As my mother was a smack addict and prostitute and abandoned me as a baby, i lost a uncle to drugs, and many friends i always said that id never IV, now i am and im doing it myself and i have to stop.
Thing is im in severe pain, my mouth is seriously stuffed, and i am awaiting the dental plan through medicare, as stated. but i have to wait another 12 days until its done, and then for medicare to approve it.
do i be honest and tell someone about this problem, what help is available? to someone like me. Or do i just suffer it out??? and try not to.
Has my GP neglected me, by allowing so many addictive medications for so long, so frequently??
I havent been able to sleep for days, my mind just wont shut down.
I am so Broken scared and confused.
Any advice, serious advice would be greatly appreciated. Its long, im scared and confused and messed up but please if you have the time, i really would appreciate some advice.
I suffer from a series of serious mental health issues. Until now, i have been to strong for to long, and recently sort help, and stuck to it, not just medicating my medications so to speak. I have a interim diagnosis of Bi-polar disorder and Borderline Personality disorder, And confirmed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Severe Anxiety.
I have been on many medications, since my suicide attempts in 08/09 but have never had seen a pyschologist for more then one sessions, or a pyschatrist unless it was at the hospital after attempting suicide.
My GP just seems to had out what medications i want, so i would walk out with valium xanax, alepam and mogadon. As well as Tramal 50's and authority for 100 200mg SR tramal.
Ive been on the two tramal now for almost seven years, with only a ten month break, whilst pregnant.
I dont take it everyday, but i will take it to get high, and ill take anywhere between 6-10 200mgs at one dose..
I am on effexor XR 300 mg and seraquil 100mg i hate seraquil i use to abuse it along with zyprexa to make be feel numb three years ago but now regular doseage of the seraquil fucks my head makes me all cloudy in the morning. So i stopped usage of the seraquil about a month ago. I have been seeing the same GP at the same clinic for a good half of my life.
This year my depression has sunk to a alltime low again and i broke up with my long time significant other, i relapsed and started abusing my xanax and valium. And the alepam, i have a bad dental problem and often get oxycodone for it, i attempted suicide at the start of the year. By over doseing and i am literally lucky to be alive, i had 40 endone and 60 alepam, it wasnt premeditated. it just happened.
I self harmed for the first time in 11 years since i was sexually assulted as a teenager.
After all of this my GP continues to prescribe these medications. 5 months later a patient died of hers involving xanax valium sleeping tablets and oxycodone/oxycontin dont know if this patient is on all of them, or which one it was she just said she wont be prescribing them to me anymore due to her being on the name of the drugs that he O'd on
She has left on leave and will be back at the end of the month where i will be seeing her for my dental care plan to be finished.
no other dr will prescribe me my medications because they say its a lethal cocktail, so ive been un medicated,
I am seeing a pyschatrist on friday, and i dont know what to say to him.
My effexor isnt working, im IV using my valium and xanax and went thru 50 of each in 3 days. Ive also started to IV the oxycontin and am about to have my last one. Ive never IV'd before it started 2 months ago with valium and xanax, and then i stopped, a wk later life became hard,relapsed and i havent stopped. I cant get my repeats filled because they were only done 5 days ago for my xanax.
I have no Oxy's left for my pain, and ive been on them pretty much flat out for 24 days now with severe dental pain :'( I wish i never made the decision to IV and i am disgusted in myself for doing so. As my mother was a smack addict and prostitute and abandoned me as a baby, i lost a uncle to drugs, and many friends i always said that id never IV, now i am and im doing it myself and i have to stop.
Thing is im in severe pain, my mouth is seriously stuffed, and i am awaiting the dental plan through medicare, as stated. but i have to wait another 12 days until its done, and then for medicare to approve it.
do i be honest and tell someone about this problem, what help is available? to someone like me. Or do i just suffer it out??? and try not to.
Has my GP neglected me, by allowing so many addictive medications for so long, so frequently??
I havent been able to sleep for days, my mind just wont shut down.
I am so Broken scared and confused.
here's one place, but also many other around where people can go and seek help, assistance, advice or guidence. 
