staudri
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2003
- Messages
- 539
this is the first paper i wrote for college, and i would appreciate it if you wonderful blers could read over it and let me in on your opinions, if there any corrections you see, lemme know, and if you think it sucks or rocks , you can let me know that too :D any feed back would be awesome !
ps- its due tomorrow.
On my fifteenth birthday I had to beg my mom to let me go out. I was grounded at the time but I thought I had the right to have a party. After two hours of crying, whining, manipulatingand bargaining I was finally allowed to leave the house until ten o clock that night. I called my best friend Stacy. I was so excited she could hardly understand me, but she eventually got the
point and was on her way. I got dressed and waited on my back porch for ten minutes, which in my opinion was more like a few hours. She finally pulled up in my drive way and I could feel the
excitement welling up in my chest. I opened the door to tell my mom I was leaving. I think it came out more like “Stacy’s ‘ere, gotago, loves ya lots, be home later, BYE!”. I don’t think she
could have understood one word as fast as I was talking. I bounded down the stairs and into the driveway.
We loaded into the back of a van, and I’m not talking ‘soccer-mom caravan’, I mean a van as big as a tank. It was gutted in the back and filled with my friends and a few cases of
Icehouse. I asked no questions and we peeled out of my driveway. I didn’t know where we were headed, nor did I care. We drove through town, smoking cigarettes and laughing. I came to the realization that we weren’t in town anymore, and it dawned on me that I actually had no clue where we were at. I didn’t care, because at least I wasn’t at home. We were driving up a mountain on a tiny one lane road. After awhile we came upon a gas station. We pulled in and Stacy asked me if I wanted anything.
“No thanks”
“You sure?”
“Yea, just make it fast”
She took off running with the enthusiasm of a five year old. I sat on the moldy smelling carpet in the back of the van wondering where the hell they were. Stacy came skipping out of the store
with a shit-eating grin and her hands behind her back. She rejoined me in the van, and she couldn’t stop giggling. I asked what was so hilarious and she presented me with a king sized
snickers bar that had been impaled with fifteen miniature candles. She began to light them as my heart swelled with joy. It was the strangest candy bar I had ever seen. I blew out the candles of my ‘birthday cake’ in the parking lot of that nameless gas station. I was chewing on the caramel and peanuts as we pulled out and back onto the road. We continued on the tiny road for another few minutes, then we turned onto an even smaller road that led us deeper into the woods. About five minutes later, after being bounced around like rag-dolls, we came to a stop and she informed me that it was time to get out. I stepped out of the van and onto damp sand. I looked around and found myself in the most serene environment I had ever seen. A creek ran in front of me, so clean I could see the bottom. Trees lined both sides of the creek and as far as I could see in any direction. A million different shades of green lit up as the evening sun shone through the branches. Stacy apparently didn’t feel the need to advise me to bring a swimsuit, although she knew that my first impulse would be to jump in. It was late June and so muggy you could hardlybreathe. Her boyfriend had hauled a box out of the van while I was soaking up all the serenity.
He dropped it on the ground at my feet and threw me a lighter. It was full of fire-crackers. Stacy and I went to town. We lit a half a dozen and threw them in the water to see how long they
would skid along the surface. After most of them were gone I decided it was time to jump in, something I had been waiting to do since I first laid eyes on the cool clear water. Stacy seemed to
know exactly what I was thinking. We both took off running full speed into the water. It was deep enough to reach our shoulders by the time we got out to the middle. I started to look around
and noticed a rope hanging lifelessly a few yards upstream. The end of it barely touched the middle of the creek, just enough to make ripples when the stale summer breeze hit it.
This scene was just too tranquil, it desperately needed disturbing. I swam over to investigate. Stacy followed. Before she could catch up to me I was already climbing the rocks on
the side of the creek. When I got to the top I realized that I was much higher up than I had anticipated. I disregarded the feeling of imminent danger and instructed Stacy to throw me the
rope. After several missed attempts I finally caught the rope. It was warm from the sun. I reached up and grabbed as high as I could. I ignored the terror I felt as I bent my knees and leapt into the air. I swung all the way to the other side of the creek but waited until I was back in the middle to let go. I could swear it took me at least a minute and a half before I broke the surface of the water. Up until this point I had done a decent job of keeping my hair dry, but now I just gave up. This went on for hours as Stacy and I alternated turns. Our other friends just sat on the sand and laughed at us, but we were blissfully unaware. After we had exhausted ourselves we joined the others. We sat there, on the sand and rocks, our blistered fingers being cooled and soothed by the cold glass bottles of Icehouse.
I was suddenly filled with panic when I noticed that the air was no longer stale and muggy, but cool and fresh. How long had we been here? In any event, it was definitely time to leave. We loaded back into the van, and I instantly understood why it smelled like mold. We were still soaking wet and it was seeping into the old faded shag carpet. I had them drop me off a block away from my house so that I could have a moment alone to process my lie. It didn’t help. I stood at my back door for several long minutes going over the story in my head. I timidly
turned the knob and slipped inside. Of course my mom was waiting for me. It was overwhelmingly difficult trying to explain to her why I was squishing water out of my tennis shoes and onto her carpet at two thirty in the morning. Not to mention why I was
stumbling. The next three months that I spent in my room grounded were well worth the memories I have of that night.
ps- some facts have been warped due to being too fucked up
ps- its due tomorrow.
On my fifteenth birthday I had to beg my mom to let me go out. I was grounded at the time but I thought I had the right to have a party. After two hours of crying, whining, manipulatingand bargaining I was finally allowed to leave the house until ten o clock that night. I called my best friend Stacy. I was so excited she could hardly understand me, but she eventually got the
point and was on her way. I got dressed and waited on my back porch for ten minutes, which in my opinion was more like a few hours. She finally pulled up in my drive way and I could feel the
excitement welling up in my chest. I opened the door to tell my mom I was leaving. I think it came out more like “Stacy’s ‘ere, gotago, loves ya lots, be home later, BYE!”. I don’t think she
could have understood one word as fast as I was talking. I bounded down the stairs and into the driveway.
We loaded into the back of a van, and I’m not talking ‘soccer-mom caravan’, I mean a van as big as a tank. It was gutted in the back and filled with my friends and a few cases of
Icehouse. I asked no questions and we peeled out of my driveway. I didn’t know where we were headed, nor did I care. We drove through town, smoking cigarettes and laughing. I came to the realization that we weren’t in town anymore, and it dawned on me that I actually had no clue where we were at. I didn’t care, because at least I wasn’t at home. We were driving up a mountain on a tiny one lane road. After awhile we came upon a gas station. We pulled in and Stacy asked me if I wanted anything.
“No thanks”
“You sure?”
“Yea, just make it fast”
She took off running with the enthusiasm of a five year old. I sat on the moldy smelling carpet in the back of the van wondering where the hell they were. Stacy came skipping out of the store
with a shit-eating grin and her hands behind her back. She rejoined me in the van, and she couldn’t stop giggling. I asked what was so hilarious and she presented me with a king sized
snickers bar that had been impaled with fifteen miniature candles. She began to light them as my heart swelled with joy. It was the strangest candy bar I had ever seen. I blew out the candles of my ‘birthday cake’ in the parking lot of that nameless gas station. I was chewing on the caramel and peanuts as we pulled out and back onto the road. We continued on the tiny road for another few minutes, then we turned onto an even smaller road that led us deeper into the woods. About five minutes later, after being bounced around like rag-dolls, we came to a stop and she informed me that it was time to get out. I stepped out of the van and onto damp sand. I looked around and found myself in the most serene environment I had ever seen. A creek ran in front of me, so clean I could see the bottom. Trees lined both sides of the creek and as far as I could see in any direction. A million different shades of green lit up as the evening sun shone through the branches. Stacy apparently didn’t feel the need to advise me to bring a swimsuit, although she knew that my first impulse would be to jump in. It was late June and so muggy you could hardlybreathe. Her boyfriend had hauled a box out of the van while I was soaking up all the serenity.
He dropped it on the ground at my feet and threw me a lighter. It was full of fire-crackers. Stacy and I went to town. We lit a half a dozen and threw them in the water to see how long they
would skid along the surface. After most of them were gone I decided it was time to jump in, something I had been waiting to do since I first laid eyes on the cool clear water. Stacy seemed to
know exactly what I was thinking. We both took off running full speed into the water. It was deep enough to reach our shoulders by the time we got out to the middle. I started to look around
and noticed a rope hanging lifelessly a few yards upstream. The end of it barely touched the middle of the creek, just enough to make ripples when the stale summer breeze hit it.
This scene was just too tranquil, it desperately needed disturbing. I swam over to investigate. Stacy followed. Before she could catch up to me I was already climbing the rocks on
the side of the creek. When I got to the top I realized that I was much higher up than I had anticipated. I disregarded the feeling of imminent danger and instructed Stacy to throw me the
rope. After several missed attempts I finally caught the rope. It was warm from the sun. I reached up and grabbed as high as I could. I ignored the terror I felt as I bent my knees and leapt into the air. I swung all the way to the other side of the creek but waited until I was back in the middle to let go. I could swear it took me at least a minute and a half before I broke the surface of the water. Up until this point I had done a decent job of keeping my hair dry, but now I just gave up. This went on for hours as Stacy and I alternated turns. Our other friends just sat on the sand and laughed at us, but we were blissfully unaware. After we had exhausted ourselves we joined the others. We sat there, on the sand and rocks, our blistered fingers being cooled and soothed by the cold glass bottles of Icehouse.
I was suddenly filled with panic when I noticed that the air was no longer stale and muggy, but cool and fresh. How long had we been here? In any event, it was definitely time to leave. We loaded back into the van, and I instantly understood why it smelled like mold. We were still soaking wet and it was seeping into the old faded shag carpet. I had them drop me off a block away from my house so that I could have a moment alone to process my lie. It didn’t help. I stood at my back door for several long minutes going over the story in my head. I timidly
turned the knob and slipped inside. Of course my mom was waiting for me. It was overwhelmingly difficult trying to explain to her why I was squishing water out of my tennis shoes and onto her carpet at two thirty in the morning. Not to mention why I was
stumbling. The next three months that I spent in my room grounded were well worth the memories I have of that night.
ps- some facts have been warped due to being too fucked up
