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places your barred from... and why funnier the better!

mr.buffnstuff

mr.buffnstuff

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 19, 2010
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1,124
Easy now! so then as the title says... where have you good/bad people been barred from and why? ill start

Hard-ons (hardys) Animal farm Ingolmells -
on a primary school trip in October, on a gloomy day all the boring animals were in the shelters apart from a pig stood near the wire fence. i tried to 'Gee' it up a bit with a hearty kick.... the thing went sick! jumping around and doing weird shizz! anyone this drew everyones attention including the teachers so i had to sit back on the bus and wait till we left. i got told im barred from there :|

the huge casino in Brisbane across the river from the uni campus -
me and my mate were at a high brow casino with clubs around it (if that makes sense) i decided to stick me nob in a dyson airblade hand drier.... looked round and the cleaner guy got staright on the radio... recieved a lifetime ban! the worst bit is my nob wasnt even big enough to get the airblade working! :sus:

Sandilands golf course -
i had been riding past and making my bike backfire to put the golfers off when Teeing off.... i later built a bridge for them and when fitting i let slip it was me backfiring my ninja. i later recieved a letter saying it had been put forward to the commitee and iv received a lifetime ban!? WTF :? i hate golf! i was only on the course to fit a bridge i had made for them!

Post office -
got pissed off about the price of car tax and pissed off with the cunts running the joint and how rude they was so told them what i thought... they told my dad whos a respectable member of the town community and im now barred

Barclays bank -
for nicking a box of the free pens! 8o

my mates grandparents -
for going there when they was on holiday with their grandson, drinking all the wine, pawning their motorized golf trolleys, spending it on alcohol in skegness the next day. also i ate half a frozen sponge cake out their freezer and pissed on a shoulder of beef that was in there... seemed like a good idea at 14 :D

so lets hear yours! iv got a feeling this will be a good one!
 
Numerous places, usually for getting caught doing ching in the bogs - i.e. ones with toilet attendants - those sort of shitholes. Non, je ne regrette rien!
 
I got banned from a pub last week for standing outside on the street, near the pub but not in their bit, with a tin of beer in my hand. The bird working there, told me I couldn't come in the pub with my beer. I said "yeah no problem, I'm not coming in anyway just waiting on someone" and she says "OK so get away from the pub". Told her I wasn't in the pub I was standing on the street and she said I should move or be forced to move. Told her to fuck off and didn't move, got banned....from a pub I wasn't in, didn't plan on going in and never go in because I don't even live in that city. Wasn't bothered obviously.
 
How do bans from pubs work? I mean, did they take your photo, Spade, and stick it up behind the bar, with BARRED through it in big red letters?
 
No they didn't. A mate of mine has a tag round his ankle and is barred from the city centre and not allowed in pubs, he says the pubs have a book that has photos of all the people who are not allowed in but they obviously never study it as he's in all the time.

There's a club round here that has started taking your finger print when you go in and you have to show them ID which they scan into their computer and whenever you go in after that they scan your finger again and match it with your ID on their computer to see if you have been chucked out or caused any trouble. Seems a bit OTT.
 
One for putting out a cig on somebody (yeah... :/ ), one for calling the manager a "paedophile who needs to be told", and one for reasons obscured by MDMA, Bromo-Dragonfly and Captain Morgan, which they refused to explain the reasons for when I attempted to gain entry to the place (for the first time in over a year) last week.

Those are the only definite ones I remember. Due to changes of management, only two still stand.
 
Got banned from the Ghost Train on Blackpool Pleasure Beach when I was 14 fror getting off and chillin with the skeletons...

30 years on and I sneaked on with one of my kids...they didn't recognise me - phew...clandestine business;)
 
Used to be banned in The fridge for harassing the gays in '97...
actually wrong crowd/dealing
 
Got barred from tons of places, more than I can remember. On top of my list.

93 Feet East on Brick Lane for doing MDMA in the loos

The place right in front of it, which I forgot how it's called, Vibe bar maybe? Same reason as above and it happened a couple of hours after I got kicked out and barred from the other place. In both cases it was just the bouncers telling me not to show my face around soon. That was a few years back so I should be fine now.

Spearmint Rhino the other night, for swearing at the bar man. Basically the prices listed weren't the ones they actually charged, I got mad and I was drunk.

There's quite a few off licences and kebab shops but that's just for throwing insults at the people working there.
 
Spearmint Rhino the other night, for swearing at the bar man. Basically the prices listed weren't the ones they actually charged, I got mad and I was drunk.
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I saw your post about leaving minus $400 or something. That's what you spent on drinks or they took it off you when they chucked you out?

One for putting out a cig on somebody (yeah... :/ )
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That's fucking awful! You actually stubbed your smoke out on someone's skin or what?
 
TheSpade said:
I saw your post about leaving minus $400 or something. That's what you spent on drinks or they took it off you when they chucked you out?



That's fucking awful! You actually stubbed your smoke out on someone's skin or what?
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Both, I did spend a fortune in there at first already and then the floor manager(with bouncers backing him up) told me there was some fee I had to pay for unpaid drinks and entertainment(lol). I did find a hundred bill in my jacket the next day though so I guess I spent maybe 200 or 300, don't even know.
 
Received a 6 month ban from the Odeon cinema for putting my arse cheeks up against the glass doors and probably shouting some abuse at staff when we were 14. then had my sentence extended for another 6 months for going in and calling the guy who barred us a wanker, or some equally devastating insult.
Been kicked out of a couple other places and distinctly remember hearing something along the lines of "dont let me fucking see you in here again you cunt" shouted at me by roid filled bouncers, but cant remember the situation or locations.
 
Mental Kenny said:
Both, I did spend a fortune in there at first already and then the floor manager(with bouncers backing him up) told me there was some fee I had to pay for unpaid drinks and entertainment(lol). I did find a hundred bill in my jacket the next day though so I guess I spent maybe 200 or 300, don't even know.
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Do you really think you hadn't paid for drinks and birds (surely they'd take money for these upfront) or were they just conning you because you were pissed?
 
I've been chucked out a couple of places for either doing drugs in their toilet (coke in the old Tea Bar on Shoreditch High Street) or being incapable (ketamine in the Bongo Club in Edinburgh [actually that's a lie, they never chucked me out, they took me outside and waited till I'd come out my hole]). A bouncer at Pure in Edinburgh told me they "knew what I was up to" (I was trying to score acid) but they let me stay. I threw a bottle of beer through the window at Maddogs in Edinburgh, smashing it, and got a kick-in from the bouncers for my effort. At Wilkie House in Edinburgh I jumped off a balcony and landed on a table of drinks, sending them flying and causing injury to a girl who was sitting there; somehow there was no retaliation until I started going up to her boyfriend on the dance floor, saying "come on then!". I got a broken nose for that.

But to my knowledge I've never been barred...
 
I didn't realise you were such a rowdy trouble maker Knock. I used to drink in Maddogs when I was a student because it was a quid a drink during the week, bargain for George Street.

Why the fuck jump off a balcony though? And then why challenge the boyfriend for something you'd done?
 
TheSpade said:
I didn't realise you were such a rowdy trouble maker Knock. I used to drink in Maddogs when I was a student because it was a quid a drink during the week, bargain for George Street.

Why the fuck jump off a balcony though? And then why challenge the boyfriend for something you'd done?
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Cos I'd drunk most of a bottle of whisky before going out. All I remember is drinking the whisky then being pushed about in a wheelchair in the Infirmary... telling the nurses "you just don't fucking care".

The drunken arsehole stuff all happened about 20 years ago. I used to black out quite a lot. Thankfully I've grown out of that. Mostly.
 
TheSpade said:
Do you really think you hadn't paid for drinks and birds (surely they'd take money for these upfront) or were they just conning you because you were pissed?
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Well I'm sure I paid for the early drinks(beer), but then refused for the mojitos cause I thought I'd seen a different price on the menu they had outside, that's when I started the argument with the bartender. Surely they got much more money than what I owed, but from my own experience in dodgy strip joints in Hackney, I'd rather lose a few hundred bucks than wake up with bruises and busted lips the next day.
 
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