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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Trans-dimensional Hyperspace Cocktail Bar - Fractals Apply Within

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Hey Help, how you doing? :)

Yeah, I have done mescaline in nature before, pretty excited to do it again, especially backpacking in the mountains. :)

I've been writing my ibogaine trip report for about 2 hours now, I have a good few pages and I have only just gotten to taking the flood dose. I'm so excited to post this report up when I'm done. It's going to have 2 attached reports too that are separate, I tripped on a low dose of DMT while still within the flood, after I was mostly functional again. And I also had a follow-up ~350mg ibogaine dose which was one of the finest psychedelic experiences I have ever had, and makes me realize that ibogaine is now my favorite psychedelic. It's actually more of a dissociative.

And I get to relive the experience while writing about it. <3 I remember the details so well it shocks me, though I have also forgotten a lot.
 
found out today that an old friend killed himself...

he was off his antidepressants about 10 days ago.. they were refilling a new prescription or something. and.. yeah long story short he was also on various substances which were not sure of.. his wife was concerned, called family.. family was concerned and called 911.. a cop and paramedics showed up.. they told him he needed to go with the cop or paramedics to the hospital and he grabbed a gun and shot himself
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wtf :(
 
No good TBH, about to lose my place and unless a friend comes through it, it's the woods for me! I'm talking 750 plus of good stuff. Solipsis will probably come bitch about liver damage and that, but for such a genius you'd think he'd post sources but I've yet to see any(not trying to be a dick!). 500-750 is a good starting point but one gram plus is where it really shines. Had one of my few ++++'s on around 1250mgs.

Fuck TNW that's to bad. I've still got a few days left here. Afraid the owners might do a dick move and call the cops before I can get my shit, but I've got my .44 right next to my chair. Any police arrive, death by pig! Fuck jail, fuck prison, fuck lawyers, I've got enough debt, no one wants to hire me even though I could tell nearly anything you need to know, with the nerve pain, I'm tired of this shit!
 
That's awful TNW, I hope you're alright man. :(

you too Help, it sounds like you guys are going through some really traumatic stuff.
 
SONN my offer still stands, I could really use it as well. Just let me know if you don't want too. I bet my friends would be interested most likely. I have it all set like I said in my PM, though I've left them hanging, it could still happen. BL's "champion" didn't sing it's praises for nothing. Shit I fuckkkkkkkkking love GHB but it's nearly a toss up which I'd rather have but given 1-ethynyl's legal status......

I really should be thinking of more important things but as I always tell people, "Nothing truly matters..."!

Much <3, my brothers!

P.S. Lackey I really hope we can talk soon....especially as I might be unavailable for a minute or maybe quite sometime......

Also MSG you fuck quit daddling! ;)
 
Just got back from working out for about an hour and a half. I figure I should focus on cardio at first, to get back in general shape. So I ran 3 miles on the treadmill and elliptical, and also lifted some weights. Feels good man. :) I woke up at 7:30, had a protein shake and a pre-workout supplement. Then I came home and made 4 eggs and drank a bunch of fruit juice.

thenightwatch said:
found out today that an old friend killed himself...



wtf :(
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I'm so sorry man, that's rough. :( A guy in my church growing up who was also involved in my scout troop, who I was very close to, killed himself by jumping off a building when I was a teenager. He was always literally the happiest guy I've ever known. He had owed people money for his business and it ran into the ground. I kinda think it was actually a retaliation for not paying but I'm not sure.
 
I'm sorry TNW. Such a thing is always really hard. I'm not yet 40 (barely) but it is crazy how many friends have killed themselves or OD'd by this point. Often the last people you'd suspect :(

Xork, great to hear man! I started working out for the first time in my life (in the gym at the farm, well stocked!) at the beginning of the year, and man it feels good. But shit, you stop for a week and starting back up is so hard! Best to just maintain and make it part of the routine in my experience! I'm in a 8 day slump away from it, gotta get back to it. Works better than anything for depression, anxiety, you name it. I never ran ever (unless something was chasing me, like the cops ;)) until this year. Started off on the treadmill, first a mile, then up to three, and finally doing a 5 mile hill course before graduating to running outdoors. I was thinking "man, it is so nice out, I wish I could move this treadmill outdoors..."....derp...and then realized I could run outside :D So much nicer....way harder on the body (I've got a lot of titanium in me...my sternum is held together with a titanium plate and many bones wired together from an accident that damn near killed me, lost a spleen and kidney too, and fucked up all kinds of other shit...I've got the scars to prove it!) but so much more engaging.

Keep it up man. Gonna Motivate me to get back into it....been too depressed but that really is the only cure. And Im working on responding to the PM...lots to say....but your attitude is encouraging!

Bee well PDers!
 
Ive started to work out too lately and eating more healthy. Also cutting the alcohol which is the worst toxic imo. Feels good man indeed.
 
Sorry about your friend TNW. Were you still really close to him?


On a wee bit of a lighter note. I just took some 4f-a and I'm about to go relax with a bottle of water in the cup holder of my john deere, ecig in one hand, steering wheel in the other. Run her at a rather low gear, because hey, who's in a hurry to mow the lawn when you're not pushing the mower? I got a decent sized lawn too so it should be pretty relaxing on this beautiful 86F degree day. :) When I'm finished I'll either try to work on some music or just relax more and read a book.

I hope everyone else is having/ going to have a good day.
 
I am honestly really proud of myself for how I've responded to my realizations about my life. It's no problem for me at all right now to avoid opiates, and I feel mostly all better. I'm getting so much pleasure out of eating well and exercising and getting involved with more things. Gonna start therapy tomorrow.I just made an amazing Thai peanut stir fry. It was probably about 6 servings, a large pan full almost to the brim with 2 eggs cracked in, and I just ate it all and am still slightly hungry. I've been eating tremendous amounts of food, all real food too. Today, so far, I've eaten 2 pears, 3 bananas, 2 serving scoops of protein powder, 6 big glasses of fruit juice, and orange, and 4 scrambled eggs, and now this stir-fry. And I plan to eat a big salad later when I get hungry again in 2 hours.

It feels like a spell has been lifted that opiates had me under for most of the past 10 years. Suddenly I am thinking about other things and feeling stable and good (mostly). Goals feel tangible again, and life is sparkly and bright. I can't say exactly how the ibogaine produced this transition but it did, thank GOD I went with it finally and made it happen for myself. And that is representative of the main thing I learned from ibogaine. I have no choice but to make it happen for myself because this is the one chance I get to live this life. One of my ibogaine vision/dreams was about death and reincarnation and it is one of the things I am resonating from the most. But it made me love my life even more and wanting to make the most of it.
 
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Laika said:
Sorry about your friend TNW. Were you still really close to him?
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he was an old friend, like i said, but i hadn't actually seen him in a few years. still, really hits home... and the way it happened is such a sad story even if it was a complete stranger.

i'm more worried about my friend justin, who was a whole lot closer to adam than i was.... justin tends to be pretty unstable himself and has expressed suicidal thoughts often in the past. i hope he handles it okay.
 
thenightwatch said:
he was an old friend, like i said, but i hadn't actually seen him in a few years. still, really hits home... and the way it happened is such a sad story even if it was a complete stranger.
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Yeah I wasn't sure if you meant old friend that you still hang around with ever since you were young, or the "old friend" meaning that you actually meant. And yes it would be sad and seemingly avoidable no matter who was in the situation. Maybe try reaching out Justin if Adam was one of his only close friends. If you get along with the dude, try to make an attempt to chill with him more often or something.
I know when I'm feeling down and then I hang out with people, a majority of my worries go away for that time.
 
Hey BLers. I feel bad because SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO flippin many of you, my friends, showed me endless support in the preceding months, and I see many of you dealing with stuff and I am sorry I am not returning it. I read this thread daily and I am always sending you guys love and support even if you don't read that.

This week I moved out of my family's and onto better things. I am getting my legal/financial/employment issues taken care of, and I have an unbelievable amount of support here. Oh, and I am not doin opiates, or anything actually for a while....well I had a glass of wine and some l-theaine so I'm gonna be square a while but it's all good.

All my love you guys, in so many ways this is the best family I've ever known. I love my family but they have to deal with having me as a son and that is a bitch for them....so they mean well but my friends here have made me feel just as loved as they can and if that is sad or pathetic or whatever, so be it.

<3 and I won't be a stranger for long.
 
much love to you MGS. Your story is one that will be remembered by many =D

I'm in that mode where i'm absolutely jonesin' for a trip. I woke up this morning and smoked some syrian rue seeds then vaped 37mg of the purest DMT i've procured yet. My classes are over so I'm planning a super awesome trip this weekend. I'm gonna use syrian rue to inhibit my MAO and have some sort of SONNhuasca thing going ;)
 
`^As I said in my PM, if you need a helpful ear to vent to, please don't hesitate- I really mean it <3

Xorkoth, i'm so glad to hear of your rebirth :) Truly pleased, and as always fascinated by your experience- is this trip report coming along- I find your trip reports to be almost the only TR's that are actually readable to me. The iboga experience sounds intriguing, and were your description less TERRIFYING to me, I would love to try it out. Alas, I find that plant-helper to be too intimidating.

TNW, I am so sorry to hear about your friend :( He was lucky to have you as a friend during his life though <3

MGS, good work on moving out and UP! :):)

So, me and my good friend have procured some apparently extremely strong change and were thinking of imbibing over this weekend- will be the first time for my buddy and we were thinking of taking another short-acting psychedelic. The only shortactin baby I have is 2C-D which I no longer enjoy- it feels too druggy, if that makes sense- but we may be able to get either 4-Ho-DiPT or plain DiPT- which would the best would the swirly-folk say?

Hmm.
 
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