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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Trans-dimensional Hyperspace Cocktail Bar - Fractals Apply Within

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Honestly Xor, you've pretty much given me enough reason NOT to do iboga lol.. Aya would suit me well now, I just don't think I need a trip of that intensity for a LONG time. That is scary to think of you walking around your neighborhood.. but, I hope you came away with what it needed to teach you.




I remember the first time I did DMT.. three friends came over and told me I HAD to try it.. so I did. Got flushed down a psychedelic toilet while screaming "AMAZING" in my backyard lolol
 
Xorkoth said:
After thinking about the stuff I realized yesterday/posted about, it scares me. After talking with people leading up to the ibogaine, the advice I came away with was that after the first 12-24 hours I would still be in it but aware, in reality that was very, very wrong, the first time I was actually steadily aware enough to be trusted alone was Tuesday, so my Monday, although it makes a great story, was probably one of the most dangerous things I ever did. I spent the morning walking around my house and yard/neighborhood, possibly talked to my neighbor, and possibly (I don't think so as it doesn't quite work on the timeline) drove around looking for "special drugs" at head shops. Then I freaked out and emailed my boss about what was happening to me and my family. Then MANY hours later after the morning, I was driven over to hang out (this was at least a safe environment) and thought I was pretty with it but in reality I had at least a dozen full dreams interspersed with my hanging out and I usually made no sense to people at all. It makes me nervous that I was totally unwatched for hours of that. :\
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that sounds really similar to my 3-MeO-PCP overdoses
 
Do you reckon that is like a fugue state, is that just hardcore dissociation for you, or is a fugue state just really another name for a semi-functional (mobile) dissociated state?

Anyway glad nothing got screwed on that on, X. You do sound like you had or are having realisations about yourself and your life, do you think you can start using these truthful reflections and admissions soon enough? Maybe too soon to tell if you are still experiencing dream-like states of consciousness... I imagine that can be so confusing that it can get hard to do some hands-on integration and work on yaself.
I'm not really familiar with the time frames on ibo, but apparently extensive post-treatment is required, have you talked with friends, family and BL-ers to help guide this at least with their presence?
You know I'd totally do it if it wasn't so geographically ridiculous.
 
It's not like a fugue state at all, I was very mentally active and joyful and sociable and I felt so alive it was psychedelic, like every single thing felt like the most amazing thing ever. I was just out of my mind and responding to people as if they were in the dream I was having instead of based on what they said... sometimes I responded to what they said but it morphed into a different situation in my dream so I answered in a weird or non-applicable way.

I stopped having dream states yesterday, I'm out of it now though up through last night at least I am still getting strong visuals at night. I definitely learned a lot, in a way, it's weird, the dreams seemed unrelated to anything but I came out of it with so much more resolve to live well and eat well, and a total removal of any physical dependence. I also learned a lot about myself and my issues from how I handled coming back out of it. I'm super glad I did it, it was a life-changing and unbelievably epic and wild adventure and it was the most out there and intoxicated by a substance I have EVER been, which for me was a fun experience since I really enjoy psychedelic states.

I'm guessing a Bwiti shaman in the throes of an ibogaine vision quest would be a fearsome and confusing, but powerful sight to behold.

I thought I had prepared everything, I planned for a month, got everything in order, detoxed as much as possible beforehand to where I was feeling pretty good, and boarded my cats. Though I forgot to unplug my electronics... damn it. :\ The real issue was that I thought I would be good after 24 hours, to be by myself, but I 100%, absolutely was not. I'm really lucky. But, I'm still glad I did it this way because I had no way to have anyone able to be present to sit for me the whole 3 days, nor would I have had that anytime soon. So I wouldn't have done it, at least not now, and it gave me the break and perspective I needed to break the cycle of opiates, and of poly-drug abuse.

I am starting to feel the reasons why I liked and wanted to take opiates again... but I just need to be strong, now I don't need them to not feel shitty nor do I have intense chemical pleading messages warping my conscious decision making process, which is a huge fucking difference. I am calling up a substance abuse counselor to make an appointment to start counseling for it so I'm not just trying to deal with this myself.
 
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So, sorry for so many posts all about me, but Bluelight is my sounding board.

I got an appointment with a substance abuse counselor who my doctor said is amazing, and I have decided to go to an NA meeting tomorrow and see what's up with that. I realize I just need to get a support structure going. I think the fact that the first time I ever tried to quit in all honesty I managed to do first try, cold turkey, stay clean a year and regain happiness within months, is what led me to believe I didn't need help. But as anyone with addiction knows, the more you do it, the worse it gets. It's like you start right back where you left off, with the same level of emotional problems and desperation, and so even though I have quit a few times since then (for only 2 weeks or less), and the physical aspect is much much less now, I need help realigning my life or this is going to go on forever.
 
^^ LOVE syd barrett`s solo career! I saw a documentary about him which told the story behind the music "Dominoes" (beautiful, by the way):


The whole solo guitar track on this music is played backwards. They were improvising and recording, and syd`s guitar wouldn't sound right.
So he told Gilmour to play the guitar track backwards and only then it matched perfectly with the music! That was the only time he had to play that solo..
Also, I just read in wikipedia that the organs in this music (by Rick Wright) inspired "Riders on the storm", by The Doors.
 
Torresmo said:
^^ LOVE syd barrett`s solo career! I saw a documentary about him which told the story behind the music "Dominoes" (beautiful, by the way):


The whole solo guitar track on this music is played backwards. They were improvising and recording, and syd`s guitar wouldn't sound right.
So he told Gilmour to play the guitar track backwards and only then it matched perfectly with the music! That was the only time he had to play that solo..
Also, I just read in wikipedia that the organs in this music (by Rick Wright) inspired "Riders on the storm", by The Doors.
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Oh man, I recently saw a documentary about them too. His music is so out there, but so gorgeous abd mindblowing too. And the way theyjam together is crazy, some of the stuff that came from that.

Roger&Me said:
oh good ol' PD social. i love you guys
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<3 We have lots of love here, that's why I love it so much. I'm so glad that it's still the same place I created.
 
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My plan was to be sober after the DOC trip, but I ended up using drugs 2 days in a row after that. Im mad at myself :( Anyway I dont have any weed, alcohol or MXE anymore so its easier. I have dmt, mdma, doc, ketamine and LSD but none of these are anything I crave for or I could use that recreationally (ket yeah but havent tried it yet, gonna save that after this sobriety challenge as a prize :D).

Have been studying the whole day, feels weird to study on Saturday. But it's gonna be the ultimate prize if I can get into this university :)
 
I used to love seeing people rolling balls but look like complete death lol

Someone will usually ask something like: Are you alright dude, you don't look so well
And 99% of the time dude replies: Yeah why, I feel fucking amazing

*Passes water just in case*
 
lol

06-07 were good years for pills. i haven't bothered to look in years.

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also
NSFW:
yabBv04.jpg
 
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