☮ Social ☮ PD Social Talk Thread: Firly Swolks Discussing Mitillating Tatters Fithout Wilters
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Incunabula
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solistus
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Not I, said the shimmering multi-dimensional duck-like being!
Sara is right now, sadly, aside from her Rx benzos... She can't smoke for another ~2 weeks for a drug test for her new internship, she can't drink due to a medical condition, and she doesn't trip anymore after some bad/overly intense mushroom experiences (I'm tempted to suggest some gentler options to her at some point, like 2C-B, but I'm waiting for an opportune moment and I'm a little reticent to be the bad influence new romantic interest who starts suggesting that she take a bunch of new drugs ; ).
edit: also, due to other medical issues, her doctor told her not to have sex for the next 2 weeks... So basically she's just been really bored lately
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Ah damn man, that sucks. My girlfriend can't drink at all anymore because her stomach started giving her major problems a little while after we started dating. She also has to eat mostly vegan, which is cool because I've been learning to make delicious food in new ways, and eating a lot more vegetables. My girl is really bummed she can't drink though, not that she was ever a big drinker but she only really likes going out to shows or hanging out with people who are partying when she can drink, but it just rips her stomach up for days. She smokes weed sometimes, and has tripped with me once so far... it went well, but was quite weak (mushrooms). She wants to take LSD with me soon, and also MDMA. She's the type who enjoys drug experiences but doesn't feel at all compulsed towards them, which is a good influence for me. So it's infrequent she likes to take psychedelics, she thinks it's really interesting to hear about my experiences though.
But yeah I'd suggest waiting until a time presents itself to suggest any psychedelics. See if she's at all open to it first.
I was listening to the radio (NPR news) in the car on my way home from her house this morning and two headlines really struck me. The first one was about how some guy went to a Black Lives Matter rally and shot and wounded 5 black men. In his trial evidence was brought up about videos and writings he had done basically amounting to intense racism. At his sentencing he said "I deeply regret it, I wish I could have done something different so no one was hurt". Uh, duh, don't fucking shoot people! That would have done it right there. Motherfucker. He didn't even get charged with attempted murder and got 15 years. To me if you're a person who's going to shoot groups of people you don't even know, you don't deserve to be out amongst the populace.
The other was about United... you've probably heard of all the crazy shit lately with kicking people off of overbooked flights when no one offers to give their seat up, in the most famous case, forcibly dragging a doctor off the plane and knocking out his teeth. Apparently they just released a statement saying they will start offering passengers "up to $10,000" as an incentive to give up seats in overbooked flights. Hmmm... sign me up! I'd take 10 grand regardless of how inconvenient it was and consider it my lucky day/week/month/year.
My girlfriend can't drink at all anymore because her stomach started giving her major problems a little while after we started dating. She also has to eat mostly vegan, which is cool because I've been learning to make delicious food in new ways, and eating a lot more vegetables. My girl is really bummed she can't drink though, not that she was ever a big drinker but she only really likes going out to shows or hanging out with people who are partying when she can drink, but it just rips her stomach up for days. She smokes weed sometimes, and has tripped with me once so far... it went well, but was quite weak (mushrooms). She wants to take LSD with me soon, and also MDMA. She's the type who enjoys drug experiences but doesn't feel at all compulsed towards them, which is a good influence for me. So it's infrequent she likes to take psychedelics, she thinks it's really interesting to hear about my experiences though.But yeah I'd suggest waiting until a time presents itself to suggest any psychedelics. See if she's at all open to it first.
I was listening to the radio (NPR news) in the car on my way home from her house this morning and two headlines really struck me. The first one was about how some guy went to a Black Lives Matter rally and shot and wounded 5 black men. In his trial evidence was brought up about videos and writings he had done basically amounting to intense racism. At his sentencing he said "I deeply regret it, I wish I could have done something different so no one was hurt". Uh, duh, don't fucking shoot people! That would have done it right there. Motherfucker. He didn't even get charged with attempted murder and got 15 years. To me if you're a person who's going to shoot groups of people you don't even know, you don't deserve to be out amongst the populace.
The other was about United... you've probably heard of all the crazy shit lately with kicking people off of overbooked flights when no one offers to give their seat up, in the most famous case, forcibly dragging a doctor off the plane and knocking out his teeth. Apparently they just released a statement saying they will start offering passengers "up to $10,000" as an incentive to give up seats in overbooked flights. Hmmm... sign me up! I'd take 10 grand regardless of how inconvenient it was and consider it my lucky day/week/month/year.
Img_9999
Bluelighter
After a couple of years without, I'll finally be able to take some holidays 
I'm so excited for it, going without breaks was really taking a toll on my mental health, but that's adult life for ya I guess. Still getting used to it. Happily everything went well work-wise this year so far, and I'll be taking a month long break from my activities starting on the second half of may.
I'll be visiting my mother, who's been living in Europe for the last eight years so I don't really see her much. I plan to move around a little bit through Europe, if the time and budget allows. I already have Barcelona in sight, since a close friend is living there. Feels great to be planning a vacation after so much time !!
@Xorkoth and Solistus:
I've also been dating someone who is psychedelic naive (Told me she had LSD once but took half a tab and didn't feel anything really ... she was pretty young too so said didn't really understood the experience), but has showed some interest in trying them. and I'm in doubt about turning her into psychedelics. I feel that, in some way, it is a huge responsibility. I mean I can say without a doubt that psychedelics completely changed my life. And I'm not completely sure I want to take that responsibility. But we'll see. We are still knowing each other, I think later on I'll maybe feel more comfortable with it. It will be no doubt a very important "bonding" experience, so maybe that's why I also feel like I must wait until the time is right. In your case, Xorkoth, I think everything would turn into a amazing experience !! You being such a psychedelic enthusiast, and at leat by what I can tell, also pretty happily in love. Sharing psychedelics with a loved one has been one of the most wonderful, beautiful, meaningful experiences I've had.
I'm so excited for it, going without breaks was really taking a toll on my mental health, but that's adult life for ya I guess. Still getting used to it. Happily everything went well work-wise this year so far, and I'll be taking a month long break from my activities starting on the second half of may.
I'll be visiting my mother, who's been living in Europe for the last eight years so I don't really see her much. I plan to move around a little bit through Europe, if the time and budget allows. I already have Barcelona in sight, since a close friend is living there. Feels great to be planning a vacation after so much time !!
@Xorkoth and Solistus:
I've also been dating someone who is psychedelic naive (Told me she had LSD once but took half a tab and didn't feel anything really ... she was pretty young too so said didn't really understood the experience), but has showed some interest in trying them. and I'm in doubt about turning her into psychedelics. I feel that, in some way, it is a huge responsibility. I mean I can say without a doubt that psychedelics completely changed my life. And I'm not completely sure I want to take that responsibility. But we'll see. We are still knowing each other, I think later on I'll maybe feel more comfortable with it. It will be no doubt a very important "bonding" experience, so maybe that's why I also feel like I must wait until the time is right. In your case, Xorkoth, I think everything would turn into a amazing experience !! You being such a psychedelic enthusiast, and at leat by what I can tell, also pretty happily in love. Sharing psychedelics with a loved one has been one of the most wonderful, beautiful, meaningful experiences I've had.
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Nice about the coming vacation. I'm going to take a mini-vacation next weekend and go to my favorite music festival for free as a VIP because my good friend's band (they're all my good friends by now really) are playing there. I can't fucking wait, a good music festival is like getting a taste of heaven for a little while. Hedonistic heaven. :D
Yeah I am apprehensive about turning her on to psychedelics. We talked about it a lot last night actually, she really wants to have the sort of transformative experience she has heard about. She's eaten mushrooms a few times and never gotten beyond some colors and patterns (also never had a bad time although she always feels down the next day which I find strange). She took MDMA once and had a great experience that she feels helped her. She has PTSD from her childhood and it really affects her life a lot. She's totally aware of it but has never been able to push past it. I think she really hopes that psychedelics/MDMA can help her with it, and I hope so too. But that makes it feel like a bigger responsibility. I really doubt she will have a bad time, she's really strong mentally and we have a complete level of trust and comfort with each other and she's a really smart and thoughtful person who is open to things. I think it'll go great (our mushroom trip together did even though it wasn't beyond a trivial level of effects), but it still feels like something to really plan and get right, and it makes me a little apprehensive. Mostly excited though. What I really am apprehensive about is whether I will be able to be a good enough guide to help her into some areas it would help her explore, but not overdo it or make the trip/roll too much about that.
Actually what I want us to do is take the MDMA first and treat it as a therapy session... at home alone together, with some good music and with the intention of communicating deeply. And then take LSD in nature and just see where the trip takes us.
But yeah, god damn I love that woman. Everything about everything she does makes me smile, every little quirk of her speech and facial movements just makes me want to kiss her.
There is literally no negative side to our relationship, after over 2 and a half years we have STILL not even gotten close to getting into a fight or saying anything hurtful, she's been upset with me a couple of times earlier on, which I didn't even know about until she told me later, because she just expressed things to me calmly and I heard her and realized I had been thoughtless in a certain way, and since I respect her so much it's no thing for me to remember that and no longer be thoughtless in that way. The only thing that's negative at all is something that only endears her to me even more... the fact that she struggles with depression and is unable to allow herself to seek her passion in life (she feels like she's already been defeated), which makes me sad and hurts me to see, but her strength in the face of that and her ability to not take any of that out on other people, ever, makes me love her more.
I'm going to take a mini-vacation next weekend and go to my favorite music festival for free as a VIP because my good friend's band (they're all my good friends by now really) are playing there. I can't fucking wait, a good music festival is like getting a taste of heaven for a little while. Hedonistic heaven. :DYeah I am apprehensive about turning her on to psychedelics. We talked about it a lot last night actually, she really wants to have the sort of transformative experience she has heard about. She's eaten mushrooms a few times and never gotten beyond some colors and patterns (also never had a bad time although she always feels down the next day which I find strange). She took MDMA once and had a great experience that she feels helped her. She has PTSD from her childhood and it really affects her life a lot. She's totally aware of it but has never been able to push past it. I think she really hopes that psychedelics/MDMA can help her with it, and I hope so too. But that makes it feel like a bigger responsibility. I really doubt she will have a bad time, she's really strong mentally and we have a complete level of trust and comfort with each other and she's a really smart and thoughtful person who is open to things. I think it'll go great (our mushroom trip together did even though it wasn't beyond a trivial level of effects), but it still feels like something to really plan and get right, and it makes me a little apprehensive. Mostly excited though.
What I really am apprehensive about is whether I will be able to be a good enough guide to help her into some areas it would help her explore, but not overdo it or make the trip/roll too much about that.Actually what I want us to do is take the MDMA first and treat it as a therapy session... at home alone together, with some good music and with the intention of communicating deeply. And then take LSD in nature and just see where the trip takes us.
But yeah, god damn I love that woman. Everything about everything she does makes me smile, every little quirk of her speech and facial movements just makes me want to kiss her.
There is literally no negative side to our relationship, after over 2 and a half years we have STILL not even gotten close to getting into a fight or saying anything hurtful, she's been upset with me a couple of times earlier on, which I didn't even know about until she told me later, because she just expressed things to me calmly and I heard her and realized I had been thoughtless in a certain way, and since I respect her so much it's no thing for me to remember that and no longer be thoughtless in that way. The only thing that's negative at all is something that only endears her to me even more... the fact that she struggles with depression and is unable to allow herself to seek her passion in life (she feels like she's already been defeated), which makes me sad and hurts me to see, but her strength in the face of that and her ability to not take any of that out on other people, ever, makes me love her more. 
Delsyd
Bluelight Crew
Bummer.
He did more to spread LSD then just about anyone. Also was responsible for finding out DMT freebase was smokable. A real psychedelic warrior.
Cream Gravy?
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Truly a bummer. They just had that documentary about him and Scully too.Bummer.
He did more to spread LSD then just about anyone. Also was responsible for finding out DMT freebase was smokable. A real psychedelic warrior.
Damn dude, I'm gonna start flying United just to gamble for the 10k bonus.
I am also apprehensive of introducing my girlfriend to drugs in general. She's become quite accepting of me using them though. I think in the drug capacity our relationship has never been better. The only thing she objects to is my unsupervised consumption of alcohol. Like she's okay if I drink one or two right in front of her, but that's it; any amount past that or outside her supervision has become taboo.
I don't blame her, alcohol is a hell of a drug. In the past 3 years there have been a number of times I've blacked out hard and endangered myself... They frequently had interesting backstories, but I also have a number of literal scars 8(
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swilow
Bluelight Crew
Hmm, Miss Swilow rarely takes drugs. She quite likes benzos and low dose MXE, but rarely can be bothered. We used to trip together and it really bonded us. Had some crazy times on LSD and various 2c-x's. But she can't stand the comedown.
She knows I'm a drug fiend, I don't hide it but nor do I advertise it.
We've been together for 13 years now, with a number of breaks mainly due to my past addictions. I think if I got seriously hooked on opiates or anything again, she'd take off. A good reason to be prudent.
She knows I'm a drug fiend, I don't hide it but nor do I advertise it.
We've been together for 13 years now,
with a number of breaks mainly due to my past addictions. I think if I got seriously hooked on opiates or anything again, she'd take off. A good reason to be prudent.
vortech
Bluelighter
Bi-triangulating is when two people synchronize their space-time coordinates to coincide. Super-bi-triangulating is when two people meet in physical space while their consciousness meet in a hyperdimensional convergence.
Tri-triangulating is where the multiplier effect really starts to shine, creating a 9-sided 4-dimensional space out of just 3 nodes. As you might guess, quad-triangulating, also known as quadulating, is a beast of possibilities within a 16-sided hypercube.
I thought you might like to keep up with my fitherlessly-evolving terminology.
Feedback welcomed for further iteration.
Tri-triangulating is where the multiplier effect really starts to shine, creating a 9-sided 4-dimensional space out of just 3 nodes. As you might guess, quad-triangulating, also known as quadulating, is a beast of possibilities within a 16-sided hypercube.
I thought you might like to keep up with my fitherlessly-evolving terminology.
Feedback welcomed for further iteration.
Delsyd
Bluelight Crew
I think quad-triangulating should be called QuaTriLating.
Quadulating doesn't sound like it involves triangulation.
Just my .02
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Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
She knows I'm a drug fiend, I don't hide it but nor do I advertise it.
We've been together for 13 years now,
Yeah I remember you posting about "miss swilow" since the very beginning. I always thought she must be a cool chica to be with such a fine gentleman. That's cool you got to have those early experiences. My opiate use really damaged my last relationshop, but then, I really needed it to end so in the end, maybe it served its purpose? Sounds like you've got a good one though, gotta hang on to those.
I'm kinda the same way with my girlfriend... she knows I do drugs more often than most, I don't advertise it though. She doesn't expect me to tell her about all that kind of stuff, we've talked about it. I tell her about significant experiences, and occasionally we trip together. Well it's only happened once so far but 2 are planned for the near future. On our first date I told her all about the opiates and subsequent ibogaine, I'm actually surprised she doesn't worry about me more. She thinks I'm kinda crazy but she seems to like it, plus I have my shit together. I think she likes to have the intensity of me in her life, the same as I like to have her chillness, but neither of us want it all the time so it works really well.
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Your logic is both sound as well as worth far more than $0.02.
swilow
Bluelight Crew
Delsyd said:
4/3/l8+ing.
solistus
Bluelighter
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So I'm seeing Sara again tomorrow, and for the first time in ages I have access to me and my bro's shared car pretty much all day and the next morning/mid-afternoon. Last time I saw her, on Monday, I had to go home at like 3am instead of staying over b/c my bro needed to leave for school at 10:30 and I didn't wanna have to wake Sara up really early( it's only like a 25ish minute drive without traffic, but in the morning rush our it could easily take an hour plus, and I did't want to wake her up early in the morning when I left. But tomorrow I can go over early, stay the night, and hang out with her until she has to get ready for her 3:30 work shift
I'm really, really tempted to tell her I love her when I see her tomorrow. I'm also super nervous, though, because my track record of being the first one to say that is not exactly encouraging (I've said it first twice in my life, once it killed the relationship on the spot and the other time I never heard it back and things fizzled out within a couple weeks )... But I really really want to, I'm absolutely crazy about her, and I know she's really into me... She deleted her OKC account, she mentioned when we were talking about her recent medical issues that she hasn't had any other sexual partners since we met, she's been the one to initiate almost every physical escalation in our relationship (our first kiss was mutual but our first time cuddling and all our sexual firsts were her taking the lead), she invited me to meet her family, she's always reacted positively to me saying sweet/sappy things, she's mentioned repeatedly how much she likes/appreciates that I'm nice to her, treat her well, that she really likes spending time with me... And we talk pretty much every day, early on in the relationship I was always the one initiating convos and planning dates but lately she's been doing so at least as often as I have.
I'm really stoned and kinda drunk atm so I know I'm rambling, but I think there's at least a good chance she'll say it back and very little risk that she'll freak out and break things off if she doesn't. And if I tell her and she does say it back, I think I will quite literally be the happiest I have ever been in my life... I've known that I love her for a while now, and if she hasn't figured it out already, I really want her to know...
[TMI alert/CW: sex stuff]
On the other hand, it does seem a little early (I don't really know, I'm bad at relationships and have limited experience with ones that make it this far...). It has been ~5 and a half months since our first date, but that was just like a 1 hour online dating coffee date. Our second date was mid-January, our third was early February, then we had another little gap of both being super busy, so we've only been seeing each other super regularly for like 2 months. Our first kiss was on April Fools Day (lul) and we had only just started doing sexytimes stuff when her medical issue came up (a few days after our first kiss she could tell that I was nervous/shy/timid about escalating so she took my by the arm to her room and gave me a bj, then on our next date we tried to do the sex but she had given me a bunch of benzos already to help me sleep, which made my dick uncooperative, so after a brief amusing attempt at penetrative sex we settled for fingering + a bj)... And we haven't done the whole DTR conversation, although as I mentioned, in other convos it's come up that we're already de facto exclusive and really into each other.
I guess I'll probably end up playing it by ear after I give it some thought in the morning after I sober up, but what do you guys think? Should I take the plunge? Is it weirdly early in our relationship to drop an L-bomb? Should I just plan on asking to have a DTR chat and establish that we're exclusive and in a LTR first? Should I ask for the DTR talk and tell her I love her as part of it? I'm bad and inexperienced at this shit and I really don't wanna fuck it up, but I'm also completely crazy about her and I really want to tell her how I feel. Any advice would be welcome - or just wish me luck
I'm really, really tempted to tell her I love her when I see her tomorrow. I'm also super nervous, though, because my track record of being the first one to say that is not exactly encouraging (I've said it first twice in my life, once it killed the relationship on the spot and the other time I never heard it back and things fizzled out within a couple weeks
)... But I really really want to, I'm absolutely crazy about her, and I know she's really into me... She deleted her OKC account, she mentioned when we were talking about her recent medical issues that she hasn't had any other sexual partners since we met, she's been the one to initiate almost every physical escalation in our relationship (our first kiss was mutual but our first time cuddling and all our sexual firsts were her taking the lead), she invited me to meet her family, she's always reacted positively to me saying sweet/sappy things, she's mentioned repeatedly how much she likes/appreciates that I'm nice to her, treat her well, that she really likes spending time with me... And we talk pretty much every day, early on in the relationship I was always the one initiating convos and planning dates but lately she's been doing so at least as often as I have. I'm really stoned and kinda drunk atm so I know I'm rambling, but I think there's at least a good chance she'll say it back and very little risk that she'll freak out and break things off if she doesn't. And if I tell her and she does say it back, I think I will quite literally be the happiest I have ever been in my life... I've known that I love her for a while now, and if she hasn't figured it out already, I really want her to know...
[TMI alert/CW: sex stuff]
On the other hand, it does seem a little early (I don't really know, I'm bad at relationships and have limited experience with ones that make it this far...). It has been ~5 and a half months since our first date, but that was just like a 1 hour online dating coffee date. Our second date was mid-January, our third was early February, then we had another little gap of both being super busy, so we've only been seeing each other super regularly for like 2 months. Our first kiss was on April Fools Day (lul) and we had only just started doing sexytimes stuff when her medical issue came up (a few days after our first kiss she could tell that I was nervous/shy/timid about escalating so she took my by the arm to her room and gave me a bj, then on our next date we tried to do the sex but she had given me a bunch of benzos already to help me sleep, which made my dick uncooperative, so after a brief amusing attempt at penetrative sex we settled for fingering + a bj)... And we haven't done the whole DTR conversation, although as I mentioned, in other convos it's come up that we're already de facto exclusive and really into each other.
I guess I'll probably end up playing it by ear after I give it some thought in the morning after I sober up, but what do you guys think? Should I take the plunge? Is it weirdly early in our relationship to drop an L-bomb? Should I just plan on asking to have a DTR chat and establish that we're exclusive and in a LTR first? Should I ask for the DTR talk and tell her I love her as part of it? I'm bad and inexperienced at this shit and I really don't wanna fuck it up, but I'm also completely crazy about her and I really want to tell her how I feel. Any advice would be welcome - or just wish me luck
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Okay so obviously it's different with every situation, but my advice would be to wait to say you love her. You can think it and that's totally cool, she'll be able to see it in the way you are with her. And when you are sure you can see it from her too, when it feels like it's almost been too long without saying it, then you should say it. IME, it can damage a relationship even if it doesn't kill it when you say it and the other person isn't sure yet, because then they'll either say it but not be sure if they mean it and it makes them feel weird and pressured, or they won't say it back and it will make you feel insecure. There's plenty of time for that anyway. Especially since at first you were seeing each other infrequently (and your first kiss was not even that long ago). The length of time between earlier times seeing each other and the duration of how long it took for your first kiss makes me think she might be afraid to move things too fast, I mean I was when I started seeing my girlfriend, I had gotten out of a long-term relationship that was really negative, and I felt like I needed to not get in too deep with anyone for a while, but I still was really into my girl. It had nothing to do with her, she was amazing, I just felt afraid to let myself go all the way there with anyone. With some time together I gradually felt fully comfortable with the idea of being in love again, and by then I realized I was.
My girl and I never had the DTR conversation, it just developed and we were always communicative with each other, so it didn't seem necessary. At some point I found myself looking at her and involuntarily thinking that I love her. Then I'd start imagining myself saying it, and trying to say it with my eyes. This went on for a couple of months, until I felt like I really, really wanted to actually say it. Then finally one day, maybe 8 months in or something, I said it to her. She actually didn't say it back until the next morning which slightly alarmed me but at the same time I knew that she did, I waited until I was sure by what I saw in her eyes.
I think you should have a conversation with her to establish what it is, and you can definitely tell her you're crazy about her. I just think that rushing things isn't usually a good thing. You're really excited and that's awesome, and you should be excited, and you can be excited and exuberant with her, but just try to avoid putting pressure on a new thing too soon. Let it unfold naturally, in my opinion.
It could be that she is thinking that she loves you too and if you say it, it will be great for both of you... but IMO you should give it a little time and get to know each other better first. You haven't actually spent a whole lot of time together yet so it's a pretty new thing, and it's best to treat new relationships tenderly. I guess what I'm saying is, it definitely won't hurt to not say it yet, but it COULD hurt to say it now, if it makes her feel like things are moving too fast or something. Which would be valid of her, it is pretty fast IMO.
Sounds like things are good the way they are, you sound really happy about it and it seems like she's definitely into you too.
By the way, I generally am timid about making the first move too... on our first real date (the first one was a brief 45 minutes eating lunch downtown to meet each other and establish that I wasn't some creep since we met on OKCupid), we went on a hike and she invited me to her place for dinner afterwards. Throughout the evening and night we made a series of slightly awkward approaches, ended up with my arm around her for a while. Then at the end of the night, I was about to say, alright, I had a great time, we should do this again sometime, when she was just like, hey, do you wanna go to bed now? I was like, yeah, and then it was on. Our first kiss was when we were already naked and under the covers. :D I like bold women.
My girl and I never had the DTR conversation, it just developed and we were always communicative with each other, so it didn't seem necessary. At some point I found myself looking at her and involuntarily thinking that I love her. Then I'd start imagining myself saying it, and trying to say it with my eyes. This went on for a couple of months, until I felt like I really, really wanted to actually say it. Then finally one day, maybe 8 months in or something, I said it to her. She actually didn't say it back until the next morning which slightly alarmed me but at the same time I knew that she did, I waited until I was sure by what I saw in her eyes.
I think you should have a conversation with her to establish what it is, and you can definitely tell her you're crazy about her.
I just think that rushing things isn't usually a good thing. You're really excited and that's awesome, and you should be excited, and you can be excited and exuberant with her, but just try to avoid putting pressure on a new thing too soon. Let it unfold naturally, in my opinion.It could be that she is thinking that she loves you too and if you say it, it will be great for both of you... but IMO you should give it a little time and get to know each other better first. You haven't actually spent a whole lot of time together yet so it's a pretty new thing, and it's best to treat new relationships tenderly. I guess what I'm saying is, it definitely won't hurt to not say it yet, but it COULD hurt to say it now, if it makes her feel like things are moving too fast or something. Which would be valid of her, it is pretty fast IMO.
Sounds like things are good the way they are, you sound really happy about it and it seems like she's definitely into you too.
By the way, I generally am timid about making the first move too... on our first real date (the first one was a brief 45 minutes eating lunch downtown to meet each other and establish that I wasn't some creep since we met on OKCupid), we went on a hike and she invited me to her place for dinner afterwards. Throughout the evening and night we made a series of slightly awkward approaches, ended up with my arm around her for a while. Then at the end of the night, I was about to say, alright, I had a great time, we should do this again sometime, when she was just like, hey, do you wanna go to bed now? I was like, yeah, and then it was on. Our first kiss was when we were already naked and under the covers. :D I like bold women.
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Img_9999
Bluelighter
I like how she's accepting of all your drug use except for unsupervised alcohol consumption. The governments worldwide should follow her example.
She deleted her OKC account, she mentioned when we were talking about her recent medical issues that she hasn't had any other sexual partners since we met, she's been the one to initiate almost every physical escalation in our relationship (our first kiss was mutual but our first time cuddling and all our sexual firsts were her taking the lead), she invited me to meet her family, she's always reacted positively to me saying sweet/sappy things, she's mentioned repeatedly how much she likes/appreciates that I'm nice to her, treat her well, that she really likes spending time with me... And we talk pretty much every day, early on in the relationship I was always the one initiating convos and planning dates but lately she's been doing so at least as often as I have.
I guess I'll probably end up playing it by ear after I give it some thought in the morning after I sober up, but what do you guys think? Should I take the plunge? Is it weirdly early in our relationship to drop an L-bomb? Should I just plan on asking to have a DTR chat and establish that we're exclusive and in a LTR first? Should I ask for the DTR talk and tell her I love her as part of it? I'm bad and inexperienced at this shit and I really don't wanna fuck it up, but I'm also completely crazy about her and I really want to tell her how I feel. Any advice would be welcome - or just wish me luck
For all that's in the bolded paragraph, I would expect she would correspond your feelings. If you really feel likes saying it you should go for it. In my experiences nothing works better than sincerity in every relationship. Even the most superficial/tangential ones I have had. Knowing each other intentions makes everything easier, things flow more naturally. But only say it if you really feel like saying it, don't pressure yourself into thinking that your enthusiasm with this new relationship must translate into saying what you are expected to be saying. Ah, I'm sure you know yourself well enough, as I would expect every PDer to know themselves.
Yesterday I got a grant approved to keep going for at least year with my research. Yay ! Working in a small private lab makes thing sometimes harder than being in a Uni or something, where funding is more constant, but at least I get to stay off the typical governmental bureaucracy (All serious universities here are the public ones, private colleges here are just a result of the recent imposition of the neoliberal economy).
Anyway, I wanted to celebrate so I invited a friend over for dinner, I cooked her pumpking soup with some coconut milk that was delicious, and also falafel which we ate with salad and some rice. We also had some fine wine (This country is a huge producer of wine so you can get quality stuff for relatively cheap).
Was expecting to have a chill evening, but after finishing the wine we decided on a whim to go to a guys house where another friend was waiting for us.
Turned out the guy sold ket, so we all ended up doing some ket. People around here like to consume Ket intravenously and I don't get it, I much prefer to consume it IM, but since doing that would have given me a longer lasting trip than everybody else I just kinda went with it and just shot a low dose hoping not to blackout which is what happens most of the times I tried IV. I didn't, but I also remember only like one quarter of the experience. Out of nowhere the guy got paranoid and started acting weird, I was slowly coming out of a K-Hole while I heard him talking near the balcony saying shit like "Those guys out there, they are all cops! Fucking cops are folliwing me !" and stuff like that.
I was still pretty ketaminized but my friend, who has kind of a permatolerance, came out of the Hole faster than me and I overheard her trying to calm down the dude, but their conversation was pretty tangential and weird, as expected from two people just coming from a K-Hole.
In the end the guy asked us all to leave, I was still a little bit impaired from the K, not holing thankfully but still corporaly impaired, walking around weirdly and stuff.
So the three of us ended up walking around the streets at 2 am waiting to sober up a bit, but it was a fun time after all, dissos tend to do something with language processing, which usually ensues a lot of silly word plays and jokes. At one point I decided to start calling ourselves "Los tres most keteros" which in spanglish would be something that translates to "The three most ketamine-users" but sounds like "the three musketeers".
Finally we felt sober enough to pick the public transport and head back home. Ketamine sometimes gives me insomnia and since I had to work today and wanted to get some sleep I took some etizolam, which is something I rarely do for drug comedowns but felt like a good idea. Ended the night cooking rice at 3.30 for no reason at all lol, I blame the etiz + the lingering effects of the wine for poor decision making. At least I have a partial lunch for today
So yeah, my chill evening endend up being a pretty sketchy time, but was fun after all. Woke up feeling refreshed, not even a slight hangover from the wine
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Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Hah, that's pretty hilarious although I would have been pretty uncomfortable during the part with the paranoid guy and then being asked to leave. Dissociatives are crazy, so different from psychedelics yet with many overlapping areas. Nothing makes for a crazy time like dissociatives. I agree they have interesting effects on language, wordplay is often a part of my disso use.
vortech
Bluelighter
Duuuude.
pharmakos
Bluelighter
myopic cyclopic?
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