Desperate Panic / Anxiety attacks - whose dealt with them and how have you managed them?

[Mr. Krinkle]

severe anxiety and panic attacks are really the only things that have actually made me feel depressed and it's terrible and i'd freak out just because i felt my heart skip a beat and i'd think im dying (which probably happens all the time anyway and i don't really even pay attention to it) ...it's horrific...

but knowing that's what's wrong with me and that in itself helped me cope with it somewhat because for a while there, i didn't know what was going on... i was just unraveling for no real reason other than the standard life bullshit...that's not normally who i am - im pretty cocky normally if you haven't noticed yet

see like you're going on about having a stroke....were you diagnosed with a stroke or are you convinced that there's more wrong with you

it does suck and i feel for ya but get to the doc asap and address it because that's no way to live

i hope you're feeling better today

 

[OpiateKiller]

severe anxiety and panic attacks are really the only things that have actually made me feel depressed and it's terrible and i'd freak out just because i felt my heart skip a beat and i'd think im dying (which probably happens all the time anyway and i don't really even pay attention to it) ...it's horrific...

but knowing that's what's wrong with me and that in itself helped me cope with it somewhat because for a while there, i didn't know what was going on... i was just unraveling for no real reason other than the standard life bullshit...that's not normally who i am - im pretty cocky normally if you haven't noticed yet

see like you're going on about having a stroke....were you diagnosed with a stroke or are you convinced that there's more wrong with you

it does suck and i feel for ya but get to the doc asap and address it because that's no way to live

i hope you're feeling better today

This summer I had the worst bout of precipitated withdrawal I went into a psychosis had a vision saw God, awoke drenched in sweat shaking I was so cold I got in the shower and was rushed to the hospital at 6 AM. My body temp was 94 in the ambulance.

Ever since that day I’ve never been the same afterwords I lost the ability to balance walk right and drive, it took me weeks to relearn to drive which is what lead me to believe I had a stroke. I looked it up and these are common stroke symptoms.

Nearly 4 months later and I still can’t even run on a treadmill I don’t have the balance to do it I will fall. It’s fucked up. Today I’m gonna ask for an MRI

 

[Jabberwocky]

Well for those who haven’t followed my other thread I’ve been experiencing episodes in increasing frequency and intensity.

I’ve been having anxiety and panic attacks that are causing me such fight or flight response my legs are going numb. Google says this can happen the body shuts off blow flow to non essential parts of the body.

I’m not sure the reason but it’s either substance abuse related or I had a stroke which is causing it.

What have you done to help? What’s the outlook from here cause honesty this is causing me extreme anxiety and depression I’m never gonna be OK again. I wanted to start to train MMA and fight and it’s not gonna fucking happen if I’m freaking out every day.

Mainly the episodes have happened at work, using a leaf blower and I begin to panic and the noise scares me and I spiral.

Tomorrow I have a doctors appointment my primary is a pretty intelligent woman. I’m gonna tell her about all this.

I can’t really take benzos and don’t really want to have to rely on addictive substances as my nature is ill get addicted and I know experiencing panic attacks coming off benzos sounds like I’d probably commit suicide.

Any help is greatly appreciated. Sorry for all the threads I’m just going through a tough fucking time right now. Today I started to have a panic attack in the barber chair. I almost had to get up and leave. I can’t live my life like this man it’s fucking embarrassing. I feel like I can’t even cope with daily activities anymore.

So in regards to the leaf blower.. I myself have what they call “auditory” anxiety. Loud noises, repetitive noises, etc will trigger a panic attack almost every time. I saw that you’re going to try and get an appointment with your dr.. maybe mention the whole leaf blower thing? I think my dr told me once that the cymbalta I take helps with auditory anxiety but don’t quote me on that. It might be worth mentioning especially if you don’t want or can’t be on benzos. Hope this helps!

 

[Jabberwocky]

Hope you are feeling better today This place helps me tons in so many ways.

 

[OpiateKiller]

Hope you are feeling better today This place helps me tons in so many ways.

I just went to the doctor. It went OK she referred a psychiatrist which is good. She didn’t really believe I had a stroke which is pretty annoying I’m pretty sure I did why else would my balance be off.

I guess it doesn’t matter if I had one or not it was 4 months ago the MRI probably might not even show it at this point and even if I did have one I don’t think there is anything they can do anyways so I guess I should just forget about it.

I’m doing OK today I will push through

 

[deficiT]

Thank you some great advice in here. Man I get some of the best help on blue light this website really has positively driven my life and my knowledge of many things medical and drug related.

I’m gonna have an open mind and do what I need to do right now to fix this and if that’s a SSRI im ok trying it. Honestly you’re right worst case 3 days in I just stop

Hopefully my doctor is receptive tomorrow. She was really cool about all my drug addiction issues so we’ll see what she says. She’s clearly a wicked good doctor I got an ultrasound on my gallbladder and the hospital and tech and ER doc totally wrote me off I said my gallbladder was gonna explode and she laughed. Then my doc took 10 seconds reviewed my ultrasound same hospital system and saw a 5 mm tare. She’s great so hopefully it works out

I took a few Gabapentin and a beta blocker today and I feel so much better. But I don’t think Gabapentin is my long term answer and I don’t think she’d prescribe it to be honest

Why don't you think she'd prescribe Gabapentin?

Personally, I've dealt with a ton of anxiety over my life. Nothing has really helped like benzos, or gabapentin. Personally, when I was prescribed benzos, I never abused them, I took them exactly as prescribed, and it really helped. It was Clonazepam, and so long acting ones are probably less prone to abuse.

But, I get the hesitance with benzos. Being addicted to them truly is miserable, and the withdrawal is incredibly unpleasant.

But gabapentin on the other hand, hasn't really given me any problems and has been pretty helpful dealing with anxiety. I mean I guess I'm dependent on them, but imo it's not really all that problematic. I just have to make sure to take it once a day, but it helps. And it'd be a lot easier to get a script for gabapentin than benzos.

A lot of people recommend therapy and the like, but imo anxiety presents as a ton of physical symptoms that are tough to deal with without either medication, or honing certain breathing techniques or meditation. Therapy never did a lick for me.

But that's just my personal experience.

 

[OpiateKiller]

Why don't you think she'd prescribe Gabapentin?

Personally, I've dealt with a ton of anxiety over my life. Nothing has really helped like benzos, or gabapentin. Personally, when I was prescribed benzos, I never abused them, I took them exactly as prescribed, and it really helped. It was Clonazepam, and so long acting ones are probably less prone to abuse.

But, I get the hesitance with benzos. Being addicted to them truly is miserable, and the withdrawal is incredibly unpleasant.

But gabapentin on the other hand, hasn't really given me any problems and has been pretty helpful dealing with anxiety. I mean I guess I'm dependent on them, but imo it's not really all that problematic. I just have to make sure to take it once a day, but it helps. And it'd be a lot easier to get a script for gabapentin than benzos.

A lot of people recommend therapy and the like, but imo anxiety presents as a ton of physical symptoms that are tough to deal with without either medication, or honing certain breathing techniques or meditation. Therapy never did a lick for me.

But that's just my personal experience.

Yeah I may try and get on Gabapentin it definitely helps a lot. We’re not supposed to be on it in my sober house but they don’t test for it. I’ll see what the psychiatrist says

Honestly I agree I could take benzos as needed and honestly for some reason I’ve taken a lot of benzos and only once experienced a little withdrawal coming off Valium. I got a bag of 200 and ate them all in about 3-4 weeks. But I also was going cold turkey off 8 mg of Suboxone

If I wasn’t in a sober house I’d be taking klonopin I have a bunch of them and at this point in my life I feel like I have a new found fear and respect for addictive drugs and they need to be treated with caution and respect or you’ll face serious consequences in my experience

 

[deficiT]

Yeah I may try and get on Gabapentin it definitely helps a lot. We’re not supposed to be on it in my sober house but they don’t test for it. I’ll see what the psychiatrist says

Honestly I agree I could take benzos as needed and honestly for some reason I’ve taken a lot of benzos and only once experienced a little withdrawal coming off Valium. I got a bag of 200 and ate them all in about 3-4 weeks. But I also was going cold turkey off 8 mg of Suboxone

If I wasn’t in a sober house I’d be taking klonopin I have a bunch of them and at this point in my life I feel like I have a new found fear and respect for addictive drugs and they need to be treated with caution and respect or you’ll face serious consequences in my experience

Yeah, at the halfway house I was at earlier in the year, they said that they "wouldn't" allow me to be on gabapentin. Luckily my psychiatrist kept prescribing it to me and my house manager continued to dole them out to me. The only meds they hung onto there were the maintenance meds, and I guess the gabapentin. I was only there for the two months that I had funding for.

I think it's bullshit the regulations some of these places put in place against certain medications. That type of stuff is between you and the doctor, and if you need something for ADHD or anxiety, you shouldn't be prevented from taking it, I'm really not sure why that isn't illegal.

Yeah, I mean definitely still be careful going into it. Gabapentin withdrawal isn't exactly pleasant either. It definitely becomes hard to sleep if I forget to take it, but that's pretty much the only symptom I get.

 

[lovemissile66]

Fluoxetine helps my anxiety and depression but I cant cum or take extacy. So its swings and roundabouts really. But in the toss up between nutting and rolling, and being a functional human being I choose the latter.

I've tried zoloft but that shit just makes reality dull. And withdrawals are like being tazed in the brain every 60 seconds for a week.

But tbh my brain probably works differently to yourse and I would recommend going to you doctor although he will probably start you off on fluoxetine. Oh and oral solutions of fluoxetine taste awful so go for the pills even if they are a higher dose.

My shrink added Welbutrin 100mgs, in the morning for that 'nutting' issue you are talking about. I had to choose between orgasms and a sounder mind. I wanted both!!! And I had them until my descent

into heroin addiction.

 

[Robi]

I've been trapped for years in an ongoing trauma that causes occasional panic attacks. I live with low level anxiety almost all the time that I medicate with low dose ketamine plus a slew of other supplements; but for huge anxiety attacks I just do heavy sedation. I take zopiclone or xanax, sometimes together. I may add a glass of wine with it. I don't even bother trying to work through it anymore because what I need to change my life is money and I don't have it and I'm too disabled to get it. So when I start freaking out I just knock myself out. Fortunately it only happens every couple of months or so. I know all the psychological roots but without life change it won't go away. I don't let that kind of traumatic anxiety have a voice anymore. Terror with no solution is soul damaging. The animal body gets shut up ASAP, no negotiating.

I don't recommend SSRIs or most mainstream anti-depressants/anti-anxiety meds since they all have shit side effects. The one exception might be mirtazapine. It helps with sleep and is one of only a small number of meds in the huge meta study done in 2018 that showed had any real lasting effect on anxiety/depression. The other was citalopram and its relatives. The other was an old tricyclic antidepressant whose name I'm not remembering.

These meds don't work on me because somehow, over the long term, my consciousness finds a way around them, and the problem resurfaces. So that's why I do heavy sedation now.

People might slam me for this but for the occasional panic attack I think red wine is awesome. I wouldn't use it for every day anxiety, just the big moments. Like any alcohol it releases GABA which calms you down but red wine is also replete with resveratrol that calms neuro-inflammation (one source of anxiety) and has melatonin so you can actually get to sleep.

yesssssssssssss, reducing inflammation is key to many issues, and as you know, gut health, get that leaky gut healed, and so many health probs lessen or go way

 

[Robi]

Hope you are feeling better today This place helps me tons in so many ways.

 

[Jabberwocky]

She didn’t really believe I had a stroke which is pretty annoying I’m pretty sure I did why else would my balance be off.

Good to hear you are making some progress. Actually, the most common causes of balance problems are related to disturbances/issues with the inner ear and there are numerous conditions which can disrupt your balance. I believe that absent other symptoms stroke is pretty low on the list.

Maybe taking a look here might help you think about what your symptoms might mean. However, don’t let Dr. Google make you more anxious than you already are. It is all only possibilities until confirmed in-person by a real doctor.

Balance problems - Symptoms and causes

www.mayoclinic.org

 

[OpiateKiller]

Good to hear you are making some progress. Actually, the most common causes of balance problems are related to disturbances/issues with the inner ear and there are numerous conditions which can disrupt your balance. I believe that absent other symptoms stroke is pretty low on the list.

Maybe taking a look here might help you think about what your symptoms might mean. However, don’t let Dr. Google make you more anxious than you already are. It is all only possibilities until confirmed in-person by a real doctor.

Balance problems - Symptoms and causes

www.mayoclinic.org

I know I fell and hit my head off a table I had a gigantic bruise and was bleeding after that OD. So if not a stroke it could have just been a bad concussion. After that happened I went to detox then Next day and was given 16 mg of sub and 8 mg of Ativan so I really didn’t notice the issues cause I was basically nodding out. Strong ass taper

I know I hit my head multiple times and even fell down the stairs. On fentanyl I will literally fall asleep standing up and catch myself falling. It was terrible the stair incident I broke my nose

So hopefully I didn’t ruin my brain. I’ve been self medicating with Gabapentin and Lyrica and phenibut (I flushed the rest of that)

Idk what’s wrong but something is definitely wrong. The leg numbness also could be nerve damage i wouod fall asleep in a wooden chair and wake up with my legs asleep real bad

Who really knows. A friend of mine overdosed but didn’t die, was unconscious for 16 hours with all his weight on his left leg and now he needs a cane. He ruined it it’s broken

 

[JoshLobbs]

My shrink added Welbutrin 100mgs, in the morning for that 'nutting' issue you are talking about. I had to choose between orgasms and a sounder mind. I wanted both!!! And I had them until my descent

into heroin addiction.

Wow I looked into welbutrin and it sounds brilliant. It's an anti depressant that doesn't cause erectile dysfunction, it helps with smoking cecation, fatigue and it increases the amount of extacy in your bloodstream by 30%.

Although it does dramatically decrease the threshold for seizures and I have a family history of epilepsy.

 

[Jabberwocky]

I know I fell and hit my head off a table I had a gigantic bruise and was bleeding after that OD. So if not a stroke it could have just been a bad concussion. After that happened I went to detox then Next day and was given 16 mg of sub and 8 mg of Ativan so I really didn’t notice the issues cause I was basically nodding out. Strong ass taper

I know I hit my head multiple times and even fell down the stairs. On fentanyl I will literally fall asleep standing up and catch myself falling. It was terrible the stair incident I broke my nose

So hopefully I didn’t ruin my brain. I’ve been self medicating with Gabapentin and Lyrica and phenibut (I flushed the rest of that)

Idk what’s wrong but something is definitely wrong. The leg numbness also could be nerve damage i wouod fall asleep in a wooden chair and wake up with my legs asleep real bad

Who really knows. A friend of mine overdosed but didn’t die, was unconscious for 16 hours with all his weight on his left leg and now he needs a cane. He ruined it it’s broken

Based on that, I’d consider the possibility you have a major case of concussion. I had ringing in my ears, blurred vision, and general confusion even 3-4 days after I woke up on the floor once after passing out from a standing position. I got an MRI which showed zip damage and they diagnosed me with concussion and sent me home with a box of 20 Endone. Common symptoms:

Headache: can be acute or persistent
Whole body: blackout, fatigue, or poor balance
Cognitive: amnesia, disorientation, or mental confusion
Sleep: sleep disturbances or sleepiness
Gastrointestinal: nausea or vomiting
Also common: irritability, mild depression, ringing in the ears, or sensitivity to light

 

[sedgewick1]

Gabapentin would definitely be worth pursuing if its helped before. I take 800mg a night, but it's for sleep. I never had a problem stopping for a while either. In fact I never knew it was a WD problem until I started reading BL.

 

[Mr. Krinkle]

I know I fell and hit my head off a table I had a gigantic bruise and was bleeding after that OD. So if not a stroke it could have just been a bad concussion. After that happened I went to detox then Next day and was given 16 mg of sub and 8 mg of Ativan so I really didn’t notice the issues cause I was basically nodding out. Strong ass taper

I know I hit my head multiple times and even fell down the stairs. On fentanyl I will literally fall asleep standing up and catch myself falling. It was terrible the stair incident I broke my nose

So hopefully I didn’t ruin my brain. I’ve been self medicating with Gabapentin and Lyrica and phenibut (I flushed the rest of that)

Idk what’s wrong but something is definitely wrong. The leg numbness also could be nerve damage i wouod fall asleep in a wooden chair and wake up with my legs asleep real bad

Who really knows. A friend of mine overdosed but didn’t die, was unconscious for 16 hours with all his weight on his left leg and now he needs a cane. He ruined it it’s broken

I know Lyrica fucked my mother up when she was on it - she got all dizzy and shit - could be that too

 

[OpiateKiller]

Based on that, I’d consider the possibility you have a major case of concussion. I had ringing in my ears, blurred vision, and general confusion even 3-4 days after I woke up on the floor once after passing out from a standing position. I got an MRI which showed zip damage and they diagnosed me with concussion and sent me home with a box of 20 Endone. Common symptoms:

Headache: can be acute or persistent
Whole body: blackout, fatigue, or poor balance
Cognitive: amnesia, disorientation, or mental confusion
Sleep: sleep disturbances or sleepiness
Gastrointestinal: nausea or vomiting
Also common: irritability, mild depression, ringing in the ears, or sensitivity to light

Yeah so that is 100% possible I have most if not all of those symptoms. What's the treatment? It seems the only thing that is gonna help me is time and that sucks because I want to fix it now but I know I can't. I just want to be normal it sucks dealing with this shit.

 

[Jabberwocky]

Yes. Dealing with concussion usually just takes time and avoiding any further trauma to your head

 

[OpiateKiller]

Yes. Dealing with concussion usually just takes time and avoiding any further trauma to your head

So that’s a no go to an MMA fight?

Today was a really good day I haven’t taken any meds today hit the gym ran 3 miles, only minor anxiety and my legs seem OK today.

I mean I have 3 Gabapentin a clonidine and a hydroZxyine on me at all times but that’s just necessary business

I did take a bunch of pregabalin yesterday not knowing we had a giant house meeting with the owners so I had to show up to a church with 120 people I know and sit in a crowded room drunk off Lyrica around 120 sober people. I think I managed pretty damn well except I kept slightly nodding out just the littlest bit but I bet noticeable to the people behind me… not good

No ones said anything and I’d pass a drug test. I think I’m all done messing around I want my life back.

Just got a call to be a real estate agent in Boston. I’ve sold myself short my entire life it’s about time I go big or go home life is too short