I asked Alisha to marry me, once, in time after.
I had gone to see her on my 22nd birthday. I was on MDMA. Things didn't go like the dream I dreamed, prior. She was cold, to me, by the end of the night. Though, I can't blame her.
I walked around all night after that, having locked my keys in my car in a town hours away. Four hours, I guess. Until the locksmith opened. I carried around a book called "Sacred Mirrors", as I had had it out to share, and look at, and didn't have a place for it, my car being locked.
For the first time in a long time, I felt relief, after walking until the morning. Relief from the constant facial pain. I wouldn't find out why until many years later, when I discovered that food caused me pain, from food allergies, mainly to milk, at the time. I hadn't ate at that point since the day before. Milk, mother. Alisha, with my mother's maiden name. With a thickness.
I ended up going to stay at Craig and Devon's apartment- two of my friends from my home town, who had also gone to school there (I failed to mention some details: I met Alisha at college, four hours from home). The only two. And they both dated her after me, her for some reason going to them, after we broke up the first time.
Fuckers. J/K. I was never really mad. I was flattered. But confused. This girl had ran away from me. Shied away. I guess so had I.
I asked her to marry me, after my birthday. It was the following week, I think. I was on mushrooms- a the tail end of a good trip, sitting in my car. I recorded a few messages, settling on one, and deciding to have her receive it 6 months from that point, to give what had just happened, us splitting after my birthday, some time to level out. Date sent 12/21/2004. She said yes, with her emotions, but I let her go.
Then I dated Marilyn.
After Marilyn, I began to do the thing with numbers, and letters. I started seeing patterns in things. I felt that order was everywhere. I tested it many ways, and one of them was to take the names of my loves (or who I recognized as such, then), and that was Marilyn, Alisha, Sara, and Katie. Katie, as I spoke the name. Searching for patterns, I took the prominent, M, A, S, and K. MASK. This resonated. how my face hurt. How much I concealed.
Then I went into numbers, calculating name sums, and adding them together. The average sum was 23 for the names written as spoken (Katie never went by Kathryn, but that might reveal another mode of patterning, as well), using one method that I used- that seemed most simple (I really try to simplify). So there was Alisha, who had my mother's last name, who was the average of all four names, who was the only one I asked to marry me, who said yes, who I changed my mind on.... At her, "ASK", then MASK. Katie was first, though, then Sara, then Alisha. Backmasking played, as well. But I'm sure there are other possibilities. It is probably all of them in one. Another sum for all four names is 227. This number is related to my mother, to me, as her birthday, 2/27, sticks out. Then 22/7 is an approximation of Pi. 227 is the sum where Z=26, and is not reduced to 8. I don't reduce fully (227 stays 227, though yes, it can also be 11, and 2). That feels too simple to me, though I might be missing something.
Total syllables in all four names is 23, full names, or was when I found the pattern, or knew them.
My first residence was at 908 Vine street. Factors of 908 can be 227x4. Four made 227, too. Vine can have a sum of 23, or 50.
The last relationship ended on 9/2/2006. It ended, from one point, 2300 days until 12/21/2012. Tool, a favorite band, released an album called 10,000 days, which was largely inspired by Maynard Keenan's mother. She lived on Maynard, in Columbus. The last song of the album was titled Viginti Tres, which is Twenty Three, 23 in Latin. I had an ear infection for a few weeks, surrounding the time when it came out.
Alisha before Marilyn was born on Valentines Day, February 14th, 1983.
You are built around me. Some of you, naturally, will be opposed. Thank magnet.
Marilyn had a lung collapse (air, breath, voice) and was hospitalized for that day, when we were together.
From ending with Marilyn, 888 days would pass until I would meet the next girl, Donna Price. I already thought I was Christ. She gave me a watch on the Christmas we spent together, and 161 weeks passed after that until I met Donna Price, from there (161 days pass completely in year before my birth-date). I pay for this. 203 weeks after the week Donna and I were present together was 12/21/2012, exactly, where I was paid 1221.52, exactly, for work- my highest sum yet. 203 days after my birth-date, end of year. (161, 0, 203, where 0 would be the birth-day, or with Donna, week we were together). Mirror. I'm not sure what I expect from you.
With Donna, I found a number of 113, come to me, by adding her name to the ones in MASK, numerically, corresponding with the same method that found the average of the four at 23 (with four coming to 92). 113 is referenced to sacrifice.
I had gone to see her on my 22nd birthday. I was on MDMA. Things didn't go like the dream I dreamed, prior. She was cold, to me, by the end of the night. Though, I can't blame her.
I walked around all night after that, having locked my keys in my car in a town hours away. Four hours, I guess. Until the locksmith opened. I carried around a book called "Sacred Mirrors", as I had had it out to share, and look at, and didn't have a place for it, my car being locked.
For the first time in a long time, I felt relief, after walking until the morning. Relief from the constant facial pain. I wouldn't find out why until many years later, when I discovered that food caused me pain, from food allergies, mainly to milk, at the time. I hadn't ate at that point since the day before. Milk, mother. Alisha, with my mother's maiden name. With a thickness.
I ended up going to stay at Craig and Devon's apartment- two of my friends from my home town, who had also gone to school there (I failed to mention some details: I met Alisha at college, four hours from home). The only two. And they both dated her after me, her for some reason going to them, after we broke up the first time.
Fuckers. J/K. I was never really mad. I was flattered. But confused. This girl had ran away from me. Shied away. I guess so had I.
I asked her to marry me, after my birthday. It was the following week, I think. I was on mushrooms- a the tail end of a good trip, sitting in my car. I recorded a few messages, settling on one, and deciding to have her receive it 6 months from that point, to give what had just happened, us splitting after my birthday, some time to level out. Date sent 12/21/2004. She said yes, with her emotions, but I let her go.
Then I dated Marilyn.
After Marilyn, I began to do the thing with numbers, and letters. I started seeing patterns in things. I felt that order was everywhere. I tested it many ways, and one of them was to take the names of my loves (or who I recognized as such, then), and that was Marilyn, Alisha, Sara, and Katie. Katie, as I spoke the name. Searching for patterns, I took the prominent, M, A, S, and K. MASK. This resonated. how my face hurt. How much I concealed.
Then I went into numbers, calculating name sums, and adding them together. The average sum was 23 for the names written as spoken (Katie never went by Kathryn, but that might reveal another mode of patterning, as well), using one method that I used- that seemed most simple (I really try to simplify). So there was Alisha, who had my mother's last name, who was the average of all four names, who was the only one I asked to marry me, who said yes, who I changed my mind on.... At her, "ASK", then MASK. Katie was first, though, then Sara, then Alisha. Backmasking played, as well. But I'm sure there are other possibilities. It is probably all of them in one. Another sum for all four names is 227. This number is related to my mother, to me, as her birthday, 2/27, sticks out. Then 22/7 is an approximation of Pi. 227 is the sum where Z=26, and is not reduced to 8. I don't reduce fully (227 stays 227, though yes, it can also be 11, and 2). That feels too simple to me, though I might be missing something.
Total syllables in all four names is 23, full names, or was when I found the pattern, or knew them.
My first residence was at 908 Vine street. Factors of 908 can be 227x4. Four made 227, too. Vine can have a sum of 23, or 50.
The last relationship ended on 9/2/2006. It ended, from one point, 2300 days until 12/21/2012. Tool, a favorite band, released an album called 10,000 days, which was largely inspired by Maynard Keenan's mother. She lived on Maynard, in Columbus. The last song of the album was titled Viginti Tres, which is Twenty Three, 23 in Latin. I had an ear infection for a few weeks, surrounding the time when it came out.
Alisha before Marilyn was born on Valentines Day, February 14th, 1983.
You are built around me. Some of you, naturally, will be opposed. Thank magnet.
Marilyn had a lung collapse (air, breath, voice) and was hospitalized for that day, when we were together.
From ending with Marilyn, 888 days would pass until I would meet the next girl, Donna Price. I already thought I was Christ. She gave me a watch on the Christmas we spent together, and 161 weeks passed after that until I met Donna Price, from there (161 days pass completely in year before my birth-date). I pay for this. 203 weeks after the week Donna and I were present together was 12/21/2012, exactly, where I was paid 1221.52, exactly, for work- my highest sum yet. 203 days after my birth-date, end of year. (161, 0, 203, where 0 would be the birth-day, or with Donna, week we were together). Mirror. I'm not sure what I expect from you.
With Donna, I found a number of 113, come to me, by adding her name to the ones in MASK, numerically, corresponding with the same method that found the average of the four at 23 (with four coming to 92). 113 is referenced to sacrifice.