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OxyContin & quitting

Dash7

Greenlighter
Joined
Dec 1, 2016
Messages
1
Hi, This is my first post but I have been reading the forums for years but I needed to ask a couple questions in my own way to fully understand some stuff.

I started taking Percocet (5/325) about 8-9 months ago. It started as a light fun weekly think to do with my cousins followed by some marijuana concentrates and a movie. I started out taking 1-2 perks and loved the high and feeling. That quickly changed.

As the months went by I started buying more and more perks and started taking them everyday, mostly with my cousins but that was when I started buying extra so I can pop on my own time when I was alone. I would take between 4-6 pills a day spread out. It got to a point where I didn't enjoy doing anything and had no motivation. I'm a music producer and I started to only like producing music when I was high on them. If I wasn't high on a couple perks I didn't want to do make music or do anything.

My tolerance started building very quickly and it got to a point where I would need to take 6 perks to feel even the slightest buzz. I was taking about 15-20 a day at this point.. I knew I was destroying my liver with all the apap in it so I switched over to oxys. I stated with the orange 40s for about 2 'months taking around 2-4 a day then my guy stopped getting them so I found another dealer but he only had 60.

I chew them for 5-10 min then swallow them btw. When I run out and my guy doesn't have any I go nuts and start wd which is the most uncomfortable thing I have every been through. In the middle of my addiction I went for a mini vacay to Vancouver. This was around the time I had a medium tolerance (5ish months ago) and I would take 3 perk doses about 3 times a day give or take depending on the day. I decided to buy my last 10 perks to take with me for the road trip and first couple of days and use this vacay to quit knowing when I run out I won't be able to get any until I'm back home.

I do ALOT of research about pretty much everything that I'm curious about so I knew about the damage I was doing to my liver, brain and day to day life in general & the withdrawals I'd have to go through when I didn't have any of the drug in my system. So I took my last perks that I thought were gonna be my last ever. They were gone by he second day and the wd started almost immediately that night. The next 3-4 days I got the usual stomach pain, diarrhea, sweats, hot and cold feeling, depresssion etc.. we stopped at 2 hotels on the way to van because it's a 12 hour drive almost so the worst wd symptoms were then but it wasn't as bad because I was on a road trip so we were constantly doing something and I was disctracted from them. long story short I got back from that trip and I wasn't craving at all and my wd were almost all gone but I went and hung out with my cousin who were still popping and they did them infront of me and I caved in.

Then it started all over again. Tolerance skyrocketed and I switched to oxys so I wouldn't kill myself of liver failure. I currently am taking 2-4 oxy 60s a day and I just want to get rid of this nasty habit that's controlling my life and holding me back from my music career because I'm only motivated and I only believe in myself when I have that shit in my System. I tried quitting again few weeks ago when I couldn't get any and I was dying from wd but as soon as I got that text from my guy you can guess where I was in 10 min.

I wanted to know what's the best way to stop this garbage. I was thinking about cutting down slowly taking less and less everyday but every time I say I'm gonna take less next time I can't resist taking same as before or more to get that high I can never obtain anyways.

One of the cousins I started perks with quit a week ago but she wasn't nearly as addicted as me. Her sister had a higher tolerance but it still wasn't as high as mine. She's trying to quit as we speak, she went to her doctor and told them about her addiction and he prescribed her clonidin. She said it hasn't helped yet but it is her first dose. Does that stuff work? What's the best drug I can get prescribed that'll get me off this ?
 
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Hi there and welcome to the site :)

I hope that you do not mind but I broke your wall of text into readable paragraphs before moving to the relevant section.

Just as a heads up, people normally skip walls of text as they can be difficult to read on mobile devices etc.
 
Hi Dash7. First of all, best of luck to quitting the opi-habit. I'm 24 and I have a similar story as you but I went from buprenoprhine to OC40 and OC80s. The past three months I have been on an off Subutex or OxyContin and been sick in withdrawal at least 5 times. One time I managed to stay sober for 8 days and I started to feel an energy inside me without the Oxy in my system. Like I could actually focus doing programming, or enjoy listening to music naturally etc...

I miss that feeling a lot. On OC80, or Buprenorphine, I feel way to dull to really enjoy life.. I can not for anything accept living like that but to me addiction is almost like an OCD of some sorts.. I don't control it, not that much at least.

Now I've managed to stay sober from opiates since Monday. To be quite honest, my withdrawal has been quite lean on me. I've read horrorstories compared to what I feel I am experiencing... but the depression and cravings have been tough on me...

This might sound like rude advice but maybe you need to avoid certain people taking percs/oxys? Even if they are actually good people, maybe you need to be selfish to beat your addiction. Right now my phone is blocking incoming calls except for my family, I think that helps me a lot...
 
Welcome to sober living.

Is being a music producer (or having DJ gigs) your full time job? And will you be motivated enough to make music while sober? Also re: the lack of self confidence in your musical ability, where does this come from?

Your cousins don't seem like good influences... but from your post ("can't resist taking same as before") it doesn't quite seem like you are 100% ready to quit, no offence.

I've struggled with opiate addiction but only got up to 30-35mg of oxy every 2-3 days at my 'peak' + no experience with subs or wd's. I still crave opiates whenever I am bored -- idle time is the devil's playground. Deleting my dealer's number helped but at your stage I think you would need to taper down before deleting their number.

Anyways getting off opiates is the easy part, staying clean is infinitely harder. I live in Van so the sketchy part of town isn't all that far away if I wanted to cold cop... and the temptation is always there.
 
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