Opioid withdrawal hell.... again!

[BigG]

I'd take as little DHC as possible to hold yourself daily until the 24th, tapering down as you go and just try and jump off on the 24th.

Tell people you've got the flu, it'll be over within days. It really is mind over matter, I've been there, I know.

But if you're still rummaging in bins for foil then I don't think you're quite ready to give it up yet...hence the bupe maintenance suggestion.

QFT...

Its over in a week. Its not THAT bad.

I'm rattling from a ton of fentanyl and if I can do it you can......

Strong mind mate......

 

[ordinary mind]

I honestly think you should dump the foil and work out a strategy where you actually know how much you're taking.

One thing though the grapefruit juice is to potentiate the lope not the dhc. Given your circumstances a lope taper sounds the best idea. You could do a taper on your dhc but it would-be short and then go onto lope. You'll be astonished how well lope kills wds. Be careful to taper though as lope wds are no fun.

Thing is I took 2 whole boxes of loperamide at around 11pm on the Monday I stopped taking butyr-fentanyl.... by the time I woke up at about 9am the next day I was sick as a dog, spewing my breakfast and absolutely zero constipation. Maybe it just isn't for me, but it would actually work cheaper in the long run to stock up on paramol if it came to that. I'll maybe consider giving it another shot once the DHC is done (considering I feel I need it obvs), but it just didn't seem to do much at all in my situation besides maybe some mild relief that night before bed.

Will the grapefruit juice have any potentiation with the DHC? I would have guessed yes, but you're the expert here

@Fug I know full well I'm not ready to give it up.... I can't score locally and my parents are wise to drugs in the post, but sad as it might sound I would opt for stronger opiates right now in a second. Of course, there is also the fact that I am currently dependent, so I'll sit on the idea a while before committing to that ball and chain. Definitely food for thought though.

In regards to mind over matter, I have been keeping reasonable spirits so far and getting on with coursework (funny timing that, I go from thinking losing my job is the end of the world and going off the rails to having a massive potentially life changing opportunity available to me the next day...). However, I know from last time that it wasn't until I hit zero opioids in my system that everything went to shit - hence trying to draw out the taper this time, even if it means drawing out the suffering.

Cheers to the both of you, I'm going to try and get some work done but feel free to post any more advice and I'll keep the situation up to date in the thread.

 

[BigG]

Thing is mate 2 boxes of lope is only 24mg....you need MUCH more than THAT. I need 120mg at least but I have a bit tolerance (20 year opiate prescribed at huge doses)...so please dont do that....when wds set in try 40mg and go from there ..lope is much cheaper on eBay but you can't get stuff through the post.

It doesn't sound like you're ready to quit yet though from what you are saying ..

When you are ready you know where i am brother.

Edit....AFAIK grapefruit juice doesn't potentials dhc but read up on it ....I'm not 100%

 

[BigG]

Sorry for the typos....my fucking phone!!!!

 

[ordinary mind]

Thing is mate 2 boxes of lope is only 24mg....you need MUCH more than THAT. I need 120mg at least but I have a bit tolerance (20 year opiate prescribed at huge doses)...so please dont do that....when wds set in try 40mg and go from there ..lope is much cheaper on eBay but you can't get stuff through the post.

It doesn't sound like you're ready to quit yet though from what you are saying ..

When you are ready you know where i am brother.

Edit....AFAIK grapefruit juice doesn't potentials dhc but read up on it ....I'm not 100%

Ahhh I was totally misremembering lope dosages, I had it in my head that 40mg was like 2 pills or something but of course they're 2mg pills..... my bad!! Will definitely not rule that one out, cheers big man.

EDIT: I'm not sure whether I'm ready to quit..... obviously being in active dependence is clouding my judgement, but for the time being I do want to get clean. For the sake of others, and my future more than "what I want right now". I don't want it to seem like I'm wasting your time with these posts, they really have been helpful.

 

[BigG]

You're not wasting anyone's time mate.

We're here to help bro.

 

[Fug]

I was on bupe maintenance for about 2 years before I got off. During which time I would constantly relapse and then have to wait for WD before going back on subutex.

It wasn't until I hit a massive low (IV snowballs death wish yadda yadda) that I realised it wasn't worth it anymore. It's been 3 years now - I've still used opiates a handful of times, but the cravings are nothing like they were and haven't had a habit since. Definitely a slippery slope once you start fucking around with opiates and one you'll probably have to be aware of / manage for the rest of your life.

If you want to get clean, reach out for help, try talking to your family?

 

[strungout2010]

Fug talks sense...

Stick to oral. Follow the things I pmd you.

One other thing is there is no underestimating mental attitude. When the bad feelings come you can either lay there as say "oh my God this is terrible" or say "yeah this is had but you know what? I can take it....fuck it.. Bring it on cunt!!" you have to actually mean it though...

Youd be surprised how much that helps.

Great post , having a positive attitude towards kicking is the key. Iv done some seriously heavy clucks behind the door last time I was in jail I had a 80 mil a day methadone habit and was smoking about a tenth a day. Insted of lying there feeling sorry for myself and acting like a baby ( what Iv always done ) I made myself get off my bunk do 30 sit ups 30 push ups , made myself eat. Drunk plenty of water , kept pushing myself as far as I could.
You don't realise how lucky you are being in the comfort of your parents home.
You've got around 5 days of shit , but you can make easy your really not in a bad position. ( I know it doesn't feel like that right now ) just get your head down , man up ,and crack on.
Best of luck mate. Time to pay the piper.

 

[BigG]

Exactly what fug said.

I was doing fent patches sublingualy which equates to a huge dose but transdermal wasnt cutting the pain. Then I realised I couldnt work while on fent so I had to CT .opiates are a nasty drug but getting off isnt as hard as OM thinks. Talking to parents would be a great help.

Sorry to be blunt but just man up..... say you have flu and get over it. Use Diaz for sleep and within 5-7 days it will be over

 

[BigG]

Great post , having a positive attitude towards kicking is the key. Iv done some seriously heavy clucks behind the door last time I was in jail I had a 80 mil a day methadone habit and was smoking about a tenth a day. Insted of lying there feeling sorry for myself and acting like a baby ( what Iv always done ) I made myself get off my bunk do 30 sit ups 30 push ups , made myself eat. Drunk plenty of water , kept pushing myself as far as I could.
You don't realise how lucky you are being in the comfort of your parents home.
You've got around 5 days of shit , but you can make easy your really not in a bad position. ( I know it doesn't feel like that right now ) just get your head down , man up ,and crack on.
Best of luck mate. Time to pay the piper.

So true mate. I kicked 180mg of methadone last year and any wds I have now can't be as had as that ..OM is nowhere near that position.

I'm in fent wds now and yesterday (day 2) I felt so lethargic so I thought fuck you I'm going for a 5 mile run to the cemetry and back to out flowers on my mums grave. Had a bit contemplation and talked to my mum then ran home.....

Strong mind and iron will wins every time....

Opiate wds? What's that compared to watching your mum die in your arms.....fucking nothing.

 

[strungout2010]

WORD !

Your a different bread though G , to the rest of us.

 

[BigG]

WORD !

Your a different bread though G , to the rest of us.

I'm not mate...I just look at life differently.

Deprevation and hardship aren't a bad thing...they breed character and stregthen the mind and build cast iron will.

Its all perspective mate...

Thank you though my brother

 

[ordinary mind]

Thank you to everyone for the lastest posts, they've all given me food for thought.

Honestly though G, you are an inspiration to me but I think you are simply a much stronger man than I, not to mention far more experienced in this field.

 

[BigG]

Strength is in the mind mate....

You want it bad enough.....you get it..

Good luck bro...

 

[ordinary mind]

Yesterday was a bit of a 1 step forward 2 steps back situation. Smoked the foil residue at around 5/6pm..... didn't get much off it but definitely stronger and longer lasting than my dose of DHC would have been. So at this point, I thought I'd just let that count as my second dose of DHC, not too much harm done that way. Bit later on I used a bit of ket (for recreation rather than comfort needs, I swear this bag is gonna be finished long before I actually feel like I need it but goddamn, as most of you are probably aware of the depression benefits of ket, this stuff just feels so damn good for the soul). Finally, about an hour before bed, I took my diaz. It was sometime after this point that I came to the conclusion that, as I already have like half a bitcoin on a DNM I may as well make an order for gear/opioids of some form under a fake name, and arrange it so it arrives on a day where it is least likely that parents will be around. Then wait for the mail like a hawk (I'm working on my current project near to the front door, which makes this task seem easy if it wasn't for the fact that we have a porch door that sounds louder than a fucking church bell to go through to get to the mail box).

Anyway, thinking I've made the right choice for the moment, I went ahead and took my 120mg DHC dose before I went to sleep..... even though I almost certainly could have done without it. So it is just under 12 hours from my last opioid dose and I feel absolutely zero withdrawal symptoms. In an ideal world, this would be great news.... but realistically I think it is much more likely I have just undone those first 2 days of recovery. As of yet undecided as to whether I will actually go ahead and order more opiates off the DNM, I'd probably be looking to place an order so it arrives either tomorrow or Thursday if I do.

I realise this thread is starting to sound like the whiny blog of a teenager and I don't really have any questions at the moment, but I thought I'd just keep you all up to date with what is going on. Nevertheless, feel free to leave any advice.

 

[BecomingJulie]

Can you not pretend to order something innocuous to divert suspicion?

When I lived with my parents, I was always sending away for stuff by post. Nothing too dodgy in there, mind you; but another Jiffy bag in the procession would never have raised an eyebrow.

 

[ordinary mind]

Can you not pretend to order something innocuous to divert suspicion?

When I lived with my parents, I was always sending away for stuff by post. Nothing too dodgy in there, mind you; but another Jiffy bag in the procession would never have raised an eyebrow.

My parents are pretty wise to the whole drugs in the post thing. There is absolutely no way I'd be able to be in the same room with either of my parents, the days mail, and an unusual (i.e. not obviously from boots or the bank or some shite) letter with my name on it without questions being raised. Add this to the fact that I fairly rarely receive anything in the post these days other than unsuspicious business letters (which even then they'd probably snoop as to what they're about if they were in the same room, and I just don't have the kind of relationship with them to tell them to fuck off ha).

I do know one vendor that sends out gear (along with fent analogues, but fuck going down that route again) in perfectly normal business envelopes (not even a jiffy bag or anything, its actually pretty fucking impressive). He is also, based on my past and recent experience (the U-47700) basically guarenteed NDD in my area. So I'm thinking I'm going to put an order in with a fake name on it for delivery on Thursday. The worst case scenario, my parents will return it to the post office before I get a chance to open it (not actually that likely when you think about it). Best case scenario, one or both parents will be out and I'll be able to get my hands on it before anyone else even sees it.

Well thats my plan....

 

[Fug]

My family instantly see brown parcel as = drugs.

No matter what I say is in it (always say Hash...)

Thankfully don't live with them anymore.

 

[ordinary mind]

My family instantly see brown parcel as = drugs.

No matter what I say is in it (always say Hash...)

Thankfully don't live with them anymore.

Ha not being able to order mail order drugs at my own convenience is easily the worst part of living with parents again. I hardly have any expenditures, thanks to no bills, a large amount of my food getting paid for etc.

But where's the joy in that when I can't spend all this cash where I really want to. (Unfortunately I have just about managed to spend enough at this point during vacations/when I've had friends able to accept parcels for me that I can't realistically afford to move out at the moment... and of course I have no job, and if all goes to plan I with my current "project" (sorry for being so vague, I don't like to allude to my identity too much and will probably delete any pics within the week) I don't expect to be making an income for a good 20 weeks or so. After that point, however, the financial situation should pick right up.

I also have a plan B for if my good natured parents take the falsely named envelope straight to the delivery office before I get my hands on it. Order with my real name to a different address on my street (someone that doesn't know me well enough to bring the letter round to the house), then go and collect it and say I got confused between two old postage addresses when ordering or something.

I mean, in theory I think these plans are pretty sound. If they fall through it is a hell of a lot of money to throw down the drain, even if it is already BTC. Also, I'm not sure about the legal implications... if my parents took the mislabelled envelope to the delivery office and they opened it, would they contact my parents to say that drugs were found inside?

 

[BecomingJulie]

The neighbour trick is a good one, actually. Get the units right, but the tens wrong. Easily explained as a typing error or mishearing.

In fact, that reminds me ..... One time, I ordered a replacement print head for my sister's 24-pin colour dot matrix printer, which I had managed to turn into a 23-pin printer, and had it sent to a neighbour's house -- although they were in on the scam. Half an hour with a couple of fine screwdrivers, and my sister never noticed .....