Opiate Cravings

[Biochemistry]

I have a bit of an issue with cravings at present; cravings for codeine (in combination with diphenhydramine). I have a severely addictive personality, but luckily I have never ingested/insufflated/injected hard opiates, such as heroin or oxycodone, because I KNOW that I would enjoy them far too much. I would never inject any kind of drug for this reason alone. I was never physically addicted to codeine; however, I have strong psychological cravings to repeat the experience (because of the intense euphoria).

I have abstained from all recreational drugs for almost a year. Prior to this abstinence, I was a weekly user of codeine (around 240mg CWE) potentiated by diphenhydramine (in the form of "Benylin Chesty Coughs Original"); this always produced massive euphoria for me.

I am sure that hardcore IV heroin addicts reading this thread will probably believe my problem is trivial, but to me it is important. To be honest, from a scientific perspective, I know that ingesting codeine with diphenhydramine occasionally is relatively safe. The only real argument against it is that if FEELS wrong from a moralistic perspective; for example, when I am acquiring the substances, I have to be secretive and sneaky when crushing the pills and performing the CWE. I also know that I must hide such practices from loved ones as it is not socially acceptable.

Your thoughts? Do you see occasional use problematic? Is abstinence the only long term solution to psychological addiction? What would you do in my situation?

Cheers.

 

[Titus]

I have a bit of an issue with cravings at present; cravings for codeine (in combination with diphenhydramine). I have a severely addictive personality, but luckily I have never ingested/insufflated/injected hard opiates, such as heroin or oxycodone, YET because I KNOW that I would enjoy them far too much. I would never inject any kind of drug for this reason alone. So you say, as have millions who have also said this and then at some point in the future done so. Don't be nieve. What your saying is that you are the oracle and can predict your own future with certainty. You may have a strong resolve not to do so now, but that is VERY DIFFERENT than what your claiming to be factual. I was never physically addicted to codeine; however, I have strong psychological cravings to repeat the experience (because of the intense euphoria).

Your thoughts?

See bold above. If in your mind your response is anything but "yeah, your actually correct" your in more trouble than you can even imagine at present.

 

[BiggDirty01]

@Titus:

Agreed. Plus OP, the obsession with opiates eventually will cause you to cross every imaginable line in the sand, violate every moral or ethos you hold dear. You do not want to get into the game of rationalization with opiate abuse because it always ends the same: Opiates win.

 

[infectedmushroom]

Opiates will insidiously remove your ability to reason - no one is intelligent or aware enough to avoid it. Your life won't necessarily go down the toilet but just know who the daddy is in the relationship.

 

[Znegative]

I'm going to move this over to The Dark Side as this is more there territory.. TDS mods, please feel free to move it back here if it is too triggering.

IMO, as someone that has struggled with IV heroin for five years, I do not believe your question is trivial at all. The thing that I think you should notice though, is that you clearly have some shame regarding your use-which is a pretty good indicator that your treading in dangerous territory. As someone with an over active conscience, I know how horrible it can feel to go about life feeling as though your sneaking around those you love, and using in secrecy. However, if you continue this behaviour, you will at somepoint almost certainly get to a point where you will find a way to rationalize or justify your use, and that is when addiction really takes over.

 

[RedLeader]

Your problem is not trivial, not least because a lot of "hard opiate addicts" started off with something more lightweight such as codeine or tramadol. It's all the same really; is a person any less of an alcoholic if he only drinks beer? A significant amount of the damage that comes with the harder street opiates is collateral damage racked up from financing the habit. But the dependency and the mental turmoil isn't that different across the opiate horizon.

If you struggle with things as small as this on a moral level, I would be extra careful about getting any further into opiates. If you get addicted to a street opiate, you're going to end up doing things that will leave you morally bankrupt. End of story. And it will weigh on your mind from the day you get off of the stuff, if you do successfully. Trust me, this isn't something you want. It's absolutely awful to feel like you sacrificed your morals to opiates.

Only you can really answer the question of whether or not you can do it recreationally. With an addictive personality, the deck's really stacked against you, though. Even if you don't give in and let them take you over physically, an addictive mentality is still going to be thinking about them all the time. For example, even if you follow a schedule of using once per week, you're probably looking at six days a week where you're prevented from having a happy and carefree day ONLY because "it's not that seventh day." As well, at least in my experience, when I use opiates according to a recreational schedule, I tend to notice a lot of the emotional/psychological downsides of them a lot more (stuff that I was always too preoccupied with the physical downsides when using daily to notice). Opiates really do seem to have two forces - one good and one evil - working behind the scenes. At first, the evil side only really shows itself in the form of physical withdrawal, but it's much more complicated than that. I used to hate WD, still do, but it's a lot of the more subtle ways that opiates affect your worldview and your emotions that I don't just hate but actually fear.

 

[Biochemistry]

Thank you all for your replies; much appreciated.

I agree with what everybody has said. To cut a long story short, when I was feeling intense cravings yesterday, I had almost resigned myself to the fact that I was going to use next weekend. All of a sudden, I felt myself manipulating events to build around my usage, such as rearranging family events to fit in with me getting high. I immediately felt guilty for doing so, hence the reason why I started this thread in the first place.

I have made the sensible decision to stay from opiates indefinitely because I was actually quite shocked at how much they can control a person's emotions and actions (even with the mere prospect of using). After a year of abstinence, it seems as though I have matured emotionally, and the idea of getting high from opiates just seems plain "wrong" now.

 

[weekday warrior]

jesus christ your still craving cwe codeine after a year! I tried kicking awhile back, went four weeks then started again because i couldnt get over the depresion, off topic but how long does it take to get over that and feel 'okay' in my own skin again a month, a year, never? Best my ex-methhead drug counseler could tell me was "the damage will slowly heal" Any answer is greatly appreciated.

 

[Biochemistry]

jesus christ your still craving cwe codeine after a year! I tried kicking awhile back, went four weeks then started again because i couldnt get over the depresion, off topic but how long does it take to get over that and feel 'okay' in my own skin again a month, a year, never? Best my ex-methhead drug counseler could tell me was "the damage will slowly heal" Any answer is greatly appreciated.

As life is extremely complex, there is not a simple answer to your question. There may be underlying issues as to why you're feeling depressed. Maybe you suffer from depression, which is a very real illness. I suffer from melancholic/psychotic depression, for which I am on two antidepressant medications; I will probably be on these medications indefinitely.

Opiates are very good at masking emotional discontent; however, they're absolutely not a long term solution to mental illness. Self medicating for mental illness will only lead to exacerbation of a pre-existing condition. I, unfortunately, learned the hard way.

 

[BiggDirty01]

jesus christ your still craving cwe codeine after a year! I tried kicking awhile back, went four weeks then started again because i couldnt get over the depresion, off topic but how long does it take to get over that and feel 'okay' in my own skin again a month, a year, never? Best my ex-methhead drug counseler could tell me was "the damage will slowly heal" Any answer is greatly appreciated.

Honestly, it depends on a couple of factors such as length of use and what substance you were using. Generally, and this is from research at my IOP, it takes 120 days for the brain to restart and normalize production of neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin. Because abusing opiates introduces foreign and high amounts of chemicals into the brain, the brain stops production of those chemicals itself. During the acute withdrawal and subsequent first 6-8 weeks you experience the brutal normalization of brain functions (depression, sadness, lack of energy etc).

My IOP was doing several studies on this issue and the two biggest theories I heard were being rx'd an antidepressant (helps stabilize neurochemistry faster) and the need for doing ~30 minutes of exercise. Because exercise helps release endorphin's, it will help you feel less depressed and more positive and energetic according to the research I read.

Just my .02 Good luck OP.

 

[Serotonin101]

Honestly, it depends on a couple of factors such as length of use and what substance you were using. Generally, and this is from research at my IOP, it takes 120 days for the brain to restart and normalize production of neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin. Because abusing opiates introduces foreign and high amounts of chemicals into the brain, the brain stops production of those chemicals itself. During the acute withdrawal and subsequent first 6-8 weeks you experience the brutal normalization of brain functions (depression, sadness, lack of energy etc).

My IOP was doing several studies on this issue and the two biggest theories I heard were being rx'd an antidepressant (helps stabilize neurochemistry faster) and the need for doing ~30 minutes of exercise. Because exercise helps release endorphin's, it will help you feel less depressed and more positive and energetic according to the research I read.

Just my .02 Good luck OP.

Ding ding ding! OP, I'm a recovering IV heroin addict and do not find your codeine difficulties trivial at all. It's not the drug that matters, it's how you react to it (behavior and mannerisms). I've smoked meth quite a few times, I never snuck around, stole for it, did anything crazy for it. Yet opiates (heroin in particular), I'd rob anyone and everyone for a fix. Just a different drug of choice. And you bet your ass I started out on tylenol 3s back at the beginning. P.S.- Codeine has a ceiling dose of I think 400mg? Anything more than that is null and void so if you continue using, your tolerance WILL FORCE YOU to move up the opiate ladder to even catch a buzz, vics, percs, Roxi/OC, dilaudid, The Horrible Capital H, Fentanyl, Opana, etc. Drop Dope while you can. Things get better without poppies and their chemical brethren, I promise you.