"One may not reach the dawn save by the path of the night"

[ocean]

We've had threads with positive stories, threads of support and hope......
I thought , rather than digging one of those out we could start one of a different kind.

I invite you to share a story here where you were in a dark moment, or at a cross roads-
What was the moment of hope, or light that changed your mindset and helped you come out of the shadow of your trauma?







The idea for this was inspired by a few quotes ('casue you know I love my quotes):

"Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars."

"Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart."

"When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight."
— Khalil Gibran

 

[panic in paradise]

"... must of been the roses."

- Jerry Garcia

 

[suessmayr]

I like the premise of this thread. I'd love to hear some stories!

"Disaster is virtue's opportunity; how can a noble mind reveal itself except through some calamity?" - L.A. Seneca.

 

[ocean]

Okay....well, I'll start us off I guess.......
I was trying to decide what story, or which thing I'd mention here.

I was in a bad place for about two years. Mentally, physically, spiritually.
I was in therapy, and my therapist had said something to me like "This is your life, you are the only one living it." . It struck me- and while this wasn't one SINGLE MOMENT, that lit a match in me, it did make me pay some attention to more around me. I started hearing things like that, over and over- and seeing little signs that would tell me to think of ME.
I had neglected myself for a long time and while I wasn't admitting it for a while, when she gave me the 'this is your life' talk, it changed me. She told me it wasn't selfish to think of myself. It wasn't selfish to want to be important to the people in my life....but I had to be important to ME first.
That whole time period happened to be one of the biggest turning points in my life.
It was painful, and awful- but I knew that in the end, it was best.
Now, it's probably been about 8-10 months since that talk, maybe even a year- but my life has changed DRASTICALLY and I know that I live for me.....and it is okay to want to be happy, and to BE happy- and to spoil myself a bit.
I let go of the guilt and the anger I had for not only myself for not putting myself as a priority, but others as well.

I don't know. Something small, like being told it is okay to think of yourself, and that this is your life- while it seems so obvious - really struck a cord and woke me up.

 

[suessmayr]

I can to a degree relate to that. It seems alot like the "we only live once" argument, whose gist I think is perspective. Sometimes I get a flash of perspective - reading history or natural science, watching documentaries, reading certain types of philosophy, and it seems in these moments almost childish and indulgent to give any of my time to depression or anxiety. But these moments are terribly rare!

But, like you said, there's really always a series of events leading up to any person's recovery. And they have to come together in just the right way to allow that person to build momentum and stop destroying themself.

 

[OverDone]

I remember in '93 I was living at my parent's house and I was well into my coke habit. I was pretty tore up and broken. We had a cocker spaniel who was my best bud and I would always tuck him in on his fluffy pillow at night.

I had tears in my eyes because I was intending to kill myself that night.

I heard my own voice in my head say 'How the fuck you going to end your life when you haven't even really tried living it?'

The next day I came clean to my mom and was in treatment within a week or two.

I was able to stay clean for 5 years after that but eventually chose to start getting high again.

That night was definitely a life changing moment for me

 

[spork]

for me it was finally telling my mother how i was feeling and that i wanted to end my life. i kept my true feelings from my parents and everyone for years and just pretended to be happy because i figured that's what everyone wanted and i didn't want them to worry about me.

when i made the phone call and told her that she stayed on the phone with me for hours and tears and everything came rushing out. my parents came here to see me within a week of that and were more supportive and understanding than i ever thought was possible.

it took a lot of work and i'm still working at it, but i do know what it's like now to feel hope and i have a stronger relationship with my family than i have before.

gahhh now i'm crying lol

 

[HeWhoHowls]

Heres the story of my salvation.
Growing up in Las Vegas, I was really dumb.
From 12-16 i was at a destructive peak.
This whole period was a cocktail of addiction, loss of self-worth, loss of family ties, legal issues n eventually incarceration.
I thought i was living the life in this go nowhere shithole of dust that blows away as fast as the hopes.
I thought i was slick n smart, an incredible start in a self-glorified road of crime.
I had no idea what the world really was underneath this dangerous veil.
Well after the last straw broke, I was kicked outta my dads house n was shipped to Long Beach.
Wasnt much of a deal, just another ghetto.
I started realizing what a terrible place vegas really is; I started falling in love with this new city.
Of course at school I made friends, but one would open a door in my mind that set a life-saving domino effect.
He introduced me to eastern philosophy, superconscious realization, spirituality, etc.
All those were words til I had my 1st psychadelic experience with LSD.
My kundalini was set ablaze n my dormant 3rd eye shook off a 17years rust.
I suddenly perceived the entire world n my own existence in a whole new light; the beauty of existence has been ever-radiant since.
I became spiritually aware of myself as a ratio to the macrocosmical universe n that I was a piece of the Big Picture.
Since that day, I have become in touch with my natural abilities n realized the true human potential.
That day about a year n a half ago, plucked me from the dark cavern of blind self-harm in the guise of joy n indulgence, placed me into the warm glow of the universe's glory n set me on a road to self-developement.

 

[SideOrderOfOpiates]

I have the right to remain silent.