phactor
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 13, 2002
- Messages
- 5,107
My current "gripe" with the rehab industry
I just really hate how these places try to tell the individual they can not do it alone. Sure a lot of people need help and guidance some may never be able to do it on their own but when you have someone saying "nah fuck that i wont get sick, who are you to tell me to stay on drugs?" should be sign enough that person isnt one of those "addicted for life needs the support of the world to stay off dope" type of person. Sorry it just really gets me that not even my heroin dealer would tell me i couldnt quit no one in my life other then a clinic has ever said i couldnt do something on my own, i was raised to believe if i try hard i can accomplish anything and that my brain is like a jack hammer enough time on a boulder of a problem and it will break it down so it upsets me when someone trys to say the opposite.
We are all capable of doing anything we set ourselves to, be it alone or in a group. I dont think addiction is a life long process for everyone and i dont think everyone needs to "actively avoid their DOC" for the rest of their lives, i think thats almost as bad as being addicted.
Heres to the g/f who dropped another 3mg against everyones advise and is down to 8mg, she doesnt sleep anymore and hates her existence at this exact moment but refuses take any more opiates or anything because she knows she can do it. Heres to anyone who tells themselves they can do it while they are in a pain only we can understand. I keep saying i look up to her and that i can only hope i am as strong and dedicated as her, sure she makes my life a living hell when shes like this but it will eventually get better! She went from 14mg down to 8mg in 3 weeks, one 3mg drop 3 weeks ago and one 3 days ago.
I hope the edibles from the dispensary I am going to beg my 65 year old uncle to get will help her sleep, she doesnt want to come off methadone slowly lol But seriously I love how supportive this thread is!!!
P.S. I cant get her to join BL she thinks its somehow an invasion of my privacy like she did my avatar and i told her "here my password and everything go on my account and just see the layout so you know what do to" (she is a graphic designer for fun) and she wouldnt. She even said "omg I went to see what it looks like and of course the first thread has something about me in it" and it would have been like the above paragraph as i hide absolutely nothing from her but shes not as analytical as me so she doesnt get as much comfort in facts as i do.
Let's flip this around:
The large majority of the population thinks that addiction is a choice. That leads to most people thinking that addicts can just stop and are choosing to use. This is far more pervasive then the disease model. Frankly, no rehab should tell people they can do it on there own, the large majority of people who land in rehab have significant problems. I have never seen someone who has a true chemical dependency just stop using. Believe me, if I could have just stopped on willpower I would have. So would 99.9 percent of people who need some type of outside support. I seriously wanted nothing more in life to stop living in a process of hell on earth. That is how bad it was for me. I fucking wanted to kill myself everyday. I couldn't stop using drugs no matter what or how hard I tried. Sure I'd get six months or a year, but it never stuck and I was really fucking unhappy when I wasn't using.
Addiction causes people to isolate and try to live in secret. In order to combat this, one needs to form new connections. Not to mention, that it is nigh impossible to hang out with old associates. As for being able to use succesfuly as an addict, its not possible for me. I tried for over a decade to figure it out. Its much easier to just not use. My life is great today.
There really is a difference between heavy substance abusers and true addicts. Even AA in the 1930s realized this. Also, there is the whole concept of "clean and crazy". I know whenever I would stop using drugs I would be fucking miserable. I couldn't figure out how to live without them. I needed lots of help.
Getting involved with a group of fellow recovering addicts was the best decision I ever made. Evidence shows that people in recovery are more succesfull when they are together. I am not sure what you current situation is, but please keep an open mind. Also, if your GF is in treatment, try to let her figure out what works for her. I would strongly urge you to not try to talk her out of attending support groups. It very well could be a life or death issue.
Also, if you are talking about a methadone clinic, I wouldn't exactly call it the "rehab industry". Methadone is drug replacement therapy, which I am not knocking but it is separate from traditional treatment and self help groups.
Heres to the g/f who dropped another 3mg against everyones advise and is down to 8mg, she doesnt sleep anymore and hates her existence at this exact moment but refuses take any more opiates or anything because she knows she can do it.
Just have to point out that we definitely discourage going against the doctors advice here. If I were in your position, I would suggest she call her doctor and let him know what she is doing. She is at a huge risk for relapse right now. Subs are tapered for a reason.
Just putting an alternative opinion out there. Nothing personal.
Recovery is about far far more then just stopping the drugs. That is actually the easy part IMO. The hard part is learning to live without them. That is where other people come in. Especially ones who have succesfully learned to live without them and handled situations clean in which they would have used in the past. God knows I have had a few situations where I would have relapsed had it not been for others.
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