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Not understanding why some people come on here

Notsoprettyinpink

Bluelighter
Joined
May 15, 2016
Messages
141
I do not at all mean what I'm about to say to come out wrong. If it seems so to some people, then I gratuitously apologize.

Everyone joins here for a reason. Some for good reasons (harm reduction, wanting to be sober of all substance abuse...plus all of the mass quantities of other topics).

What I DON'T understand is why some individuals take so much time to write (as I tend to) ALL about their reason for joining in the introduction of themselves (newer member myself but always answer at least within a decent time frame).

Some of us look at this forum 1st (I, for one) wanting to see if I can help someone else in any way. If I can't or I have no idea what the answer may be? I simply decline from posting on a thread.

Again, all of this is JUST my own personal opinion. Why begin a mile long thread, have people read it (like me because I have a loving heart) and then have people responding to you but you, yourself, never speak again.

I recently spent so much time on one woman's thread who is in a similar situation as I am. And I'm always kind and never judgemental because I have no right to be.

The (almost) funny part is most say; "I've been scoping out this site for years and finally decided to join". Then, for example, why say you're an addict in need of help? Get support here but don't write something ten million pages long seeking the support, receiving it from so many kind hearted people and then you're just, uh....gone.

Then there's those who drug seek here. I never viewed Bluelight that way and never will and if you're joining for that purpose, you're wasting your time and will just be banned.

All and all, I can't speak for everyone else on here but if you're just joining? Don't ask one question and either not like the responses you receive and just end the topic (constructive criticism is sometimes a good thing).....but most of all when someone takes the time to answer you shortly after you've made an introduction on here? Have respect and take the same amount of time that it took you (like it just took me) to respond back.

I also hate the; "I think I just overdosed" nonsense. If so? Go to the hospital, not here. And also, the; "I'm in so much pain I'm considering killing myself. I FULLY realize that these questions are allowable (not so much with the overdose question yet I see it time and time again but still say that if you think you did? Any possibility? Don't come here.

To end; if you join here and ask a question take into consideration that someone took the time to read your thread and answered you. Have the same respect back. We all lead busy life styles but none THAT busy that we can't take 5 minutes to respond to a thread we began.

Bluelight is THE BEST and I just hope it stays that way. Much love to all <3
 
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this might be better suited as a blog post?

keep in mind that everyone is going through their own difficulties and coping the best way they know how to.
 
this might be better suited as a blog post?

keep in mind that everyone is going through their own difficulties and coping the best way they know how to.
I know that because I am too (going through my own difficulties)....I suppose (to make it brief) that I wish if someone says they're considering suicide and writes their entire autobiography and someone replies with advice within a few hours (me), that they'd reply.

I also read numerous threads in which people were merely drug seeking and were banned from the site.

As much as I value your opinion (and this can be moved if need be) "coping" on the means of seclusion is not going to help. I, for one, say seek and keep talking to those who can relate to what you're going though and with the numerous forums on here I'm quite sure that everyone will find the support being seeked.

No one sits on their phone or computer 24/7 but 4 times in a row I've seen threads began by people seeking help, answered them, and then they're just gone for good. And I'm not talking about; "they didn't answer right away" (because I know how difficult that can sometimes be depending upon a person's lifestyle or what challenges they're facing).

Overall point on my end, if you write something that's either 50 mIles long (as I just did) or you are seeking immediate replies? Be kind to others as they've been to you and reply. Don't just sign up to get a one answer reply. Be here to receive support or opinions or else give them.
 
Sometimes, we try but don't succeed. On a website like this, we can lose people we get to know. If I have a chance to help someone, I'm gonna take it, even if I don't succeed.

You make plans with a friend. The friend bails on you with no explanation... Just doesn't show up. You call and call and text but no answer. They call you four days later and give you a lie about why they didn't show up just to save face.

We're all acquaintances here and I suppose as terrible as it seems, no one owes any explanation for freaking out, asking for help, then disappearing.
 
so you took time to write a relatively long intro. post but you can't understand why somebody else would do the exact same thing?

that doesn't make much sense to me...

welcome to bluelight.

alasdair
 
so you took time to write a relatively long intro. post but you can't understand why somebody else would do the exact same thing?

that doesn't make much sense to me...

welcome to bluelight.

alasdair
But I answer when I write a long thread. Perhaps I have TOO big of a heart and when I read that someone is going though a horrific time, I'd like to be supportive.

Repeating myself though, 4 times in a row I read people's life histories and wanted to cry and wishing I could give the person a great, big hug saying; "you'll be ok"....even though sometimes that sadly may not be the case.

And this was not my 1st post and not my introduction. I just look on here almost always 1st using my phone app and trying my best to be loving and caring to new comers here seeking help and feeling helpless because I can relate.

One specific woman was seeking help. She was going to kill herself. And then yes, I wrote a post longer then this one 1 hour after she posted her thread. Is she dead now? I pray not because I read her entire autobiography and it broke my heart but much I was able to relate to.

Hopefully I better clarified what I meant. A mere even "thanks" would be fine. Now I wonder about her. Did she do it? Again, I pray not. Hopefully this makes better "sense" to you.
 
Sometimes, we try but don't succeed. On a website like this, we can lose people we get to know. If I have a chance to help someone, I'm gonna take it, even if I don't succeed.

You make plans with a friend. The friend bails on you with no explanation... Just doesn't show up. You call and call and text but no answer. They call you four days later and give you a lie about why they didn't show up just to save face.

We're all acquaintances here and I suppose as terrible as it seems, no one owes any explanation for freaking out, asking for help, then disappearing.
I fully agree with everyrhing you wrote as I can often be the same way. Making plans, breaking them. Ignoring calls and texts. Geez, I've had Facebook for a LONG time yet haven't been on it for almost a year. Yet on bluelight, everyone's facing obstacles in life. I for one want to help if I'm able too even though I too have my own issues. I appreciate your response though because bluelight isn't like real life and our real friends and family and how we can often tend to become seclusive from them while going through rough times. It's about being able to tell all or speak anything and not be judged.

Plus, maybe I'm just extra sensitive. I lost 2 of the most special people in my life not too long ago. My father being murdered by my brother being one of them.

Again I just can't see beginning threads as long as my responses are.....having someone who immediately says they'll be here for them and then as much as I love bluelight, I then fear if and think about certain people praying they're ok.

Again, though, thanks for the response<3
 
so you took time to write a relatively long intro. post but you can't understand why somebody else would do the exact same thing?

that doesn't make much sense to me...

welcome to bluelight.

alasdair
The more I think about it? It's people like you who critique that may be the cause for some people not coming back. Did you even read my full thread? If you did you would've realized that this was NOT my introduction. Constructive criticism is a good thing but your response? In my opinion? Rude.
 
If you have never scored drugs from a bluelighter you have never truly lived

Or so I'm told
Then that's the wrong reason to be here. Do I see it often (seekers)? Yes. Bluelight wasn't created to be a "hook me up with some drugs" website though. If you've "scored" by using this site? I can't even say; "good for you" because even just writing what you did could make a trusted site go down.

Absolutely no offense to you even though my reply sounds like it is. I, personally, only ever looked on here for answers for drug issues and then joined for the support. No seeking here:)
 
Fully agree with your "arrow" up to the one person who replied. In my peak days? I'd let my phone "die" for 2 days and cared about nothing. That was a wrong statement (very wrong) on my part. I'd just be "sick" and stare at my walls.

Basically what I'm referring to mostly is people that write a VERY long thread, are crying out for friends, contemplating suicide and then you view it, write them back and then never hear from them again. Like I said, maybe I'm just ultra sensitive but when I read a horror story of a "life", read that the person wants to die (even while using an abundance of narcotic pain meds), I then just fear they're dead.

I KNOW I write long threads and responses buy I feel I do so to fully speak what's on my mind. But when something is written with a million (exaggeration) words, again, I just fear especially when it comes to those who are either ill or else feel they overdosed.

As for your "lol" to the other post on this thread? I couldn't agree more. I, too, laughed. Yet I've seen it. "I'm in the PA area and I LOVE OPIATES, OPIATES, OPIATES". Then people reply: "I'm near you and need help". That's where a reputable (in my opinion) website goes down which is sad.

Thanks for your input. It made me think more about my hardcore using days. During that time would I have even touched my phone if I had nothing? Hell no. But I never opened an account to say I'm "dying", received responses and not returned them either during times such as this. But, hey, we're all here for a reason and when I take the time to reply (especially to those I can relate to) I pray they at least read my input. Whether it's long (like this) or short. Again, I just fear they're dead. Whether they are just a mere acquaintance or not. I just happen to have a huge heart and I love people<3
 
Then that's the wrong reason to be here. Do I see it often (seekers)? Yes. Bluelight wasn't created to be a "hook me up with some drugs" website though. If you've "scored" by using this site? I can't even say; "good for you" because even just writing what you did could make a trusted site go down.

Absolutely no offense to you even though my reply sounds like it is. I, personally, only ever looked on here for answers for drug issues and then joined for the support. No seeking here:)
Then turn around and go home.

Do you want to know what BL wasn't created for? To molly coddle junkies and their excuses.

When I came to bluelight around 2001 it was a melting pot of like minded rave kids who partied all weekend, curled up sunday afternoon to swap stories then slowly die Monday Tuesday in each others arms until Thursday swung around and we all talked about how epic tomorrows club night was going to be. HR was a loose front so that the police didn't shut us down and many a meet up was organised where good drugs were consumed and sexy bodies shared around like the clap.

Heroin was shunned, in fact having a lack of control over your drug use was called out as soon as some one looked like becoming an addict and PLUR was not just painted on a t shirt but was a mantra to live by.

There aren't many rules required to be a safe drug user;
Know what you are taking
Make sue you eat, sleep and exercise
Don't use it so often that it gets in the way of your real life and relationships.

Anything after that is simply fluff and filler
 
Then turn around and go home.

Do you want to know what BL wasn't created for? To molly coddle junkies and their excuses.

When I came to bluelight around 2001 it was a melting pot of like minded rave kids who partied all weekend, curled up sunday afternoon to swap stories then slowly die Monday Tuesday in each others arms until Thursday swung around and we all talked about how epic tomorrows club night was going to be. HR was a loose front so that the police didn't shut us down and many a meet up was organised where good drugs were consumed and sexy bodies shared around like the clap.

Heroin was shunned, in fact having a lack of control over your drug use was called out as soon as some one looked like becoming an addict and PLUR was not just painted on a t shirt but was a mantra to live by.

There aren't many rules required to be a safe drug user;
Know what you are taking
Make sue you eat, sleep and exercise
Don't use it so often that it gets in the way of your real life and relationships.

Anything after that is simply fluff and filler
I'm not really understanding your reply at all, to be honest. I'm speaking of people who are pleading for help (people WANTING to not use). As for the seeking. Are you implying that's fine here? I'd hope not. I also hope you weren't being rude because I wasn't trying to be. I meant; someone introduces themselves. For example writes an autobiography of a terrible illness, what they take and how much they want to die. Even longer then the threads I've begun or the responses I give. I then take the time to write them in depth (once within a few minutes) back trying my best to be comforting, then their just "gone".

As for what you wrote about what occured with the meeting up and sharing drugs safely? I didn't think that was ever allowable and actually recently viewed that it's not....not on a thread of mine though and 2 of the people were banned for "seeking". But then of course there's always private messaging (forums I may not have seen yet), swapping phone #'s...etc. So that being said, I can understand how it can happen. It's not why I'm here though.

Your last paragraph? I couldn't agree more with every, single word of it.

I apologize if I came off the wrong way but I'm just going by what I viewed and my own personal experience within trying to reach out to others. Just as I'd like the same help and support when needed.

Anyway, thanks for the response, I guess. We all have opinions. Peace and have a great night:)
 
I actually had a suicidal thought coming off methadone and I wrote it in my story, the nice kind person that took the time and read my story , responded and helped me alot could of possibly helped me. Lot of people relapse and gives too shits about this site at the time. Theres alot of real good people on here that will not judge but have nothing but help and good words.

And the person that was very ill and was talking suicidal, maybe did you consider that person actually did it and that's why they are gone? I hope that's not the issue but a cry for help those actions are hard to ignore . We can only give our opinions and advice from personal experience and let them take it from there.
 
I actually had a suicidal thought coming off methadone and I wrote it in my story, the nice kind person that took the time and read my story , responded and helped me alot could of possibly helped me. Lot of people relapse and gives too shits about this site at the time. Theres alot of real good people on here that will not judge but have nothing but help and good words.

And the person that was very ill and was talking suicidal, maybe did you consider that person actually did it and that's why they are gone? I hope that's not the issue but a cry for help those actions are hard to ignore . We can only give our opinions and advice from personal experience and let them take it from there.
Thank you dearly for your response because every, single word made so very much sense. People saying they "kicked" their habit, then may relapse and are too embarrassed to come back on (even though no one would judge). Then there's others who may come on here freaking out while going through withdrawals. Those people, perhaps 30 minutes later they got a call or text therefore having no need to come back on.

As for the lady. She has a disorder similar to mine and it just hit really close to home because often I too think, "Why even get out of bed?" She got to the point she couldn't get out of bed (would I want to live that way? Hell no) but I knew of an almost brand new treatment for her (I was a nurse before developing Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy). She listed all she had done so far but this wasn't on the list probably because most hospitals don't do it....you just have to do a little searching. But the fact is I don't think she saw what I wrote and I now don't fear she's dead but feel she is dead.

To end, bluelight is over the top fantastic and I'm so very happy that your still here and that your thoughts ended up just being thoughts:) I just recently went of off (cold turkey and per choice) methadone and oxycodone. 16 days later and I'm still a little sick (minor things) but worse then all else is the PAWS. Here I went and wrote this thread and then went a full 24+ hours not coming on here and not answering anyone who was kind enough to respond to threads I have begun (in Sober Living)...

Thanks again:)
 
Hey man no bun intended I'm in the same boat coming off heroin (heavy) for years , today actually is my 1 year anniversary well tonight technically lol funny I remember exact time and date. But I went to methadone and I'm actually cold turkyn off that right now I only had a dozen Suboxone it didmt even come close to helping my addiction. I have 1 left so I'll take a piece at my absolute worse. But yea man I was never suicidal in my life until this shit so I don't know I guess I tend to say shit when I'm not feeling good.

Glad your still on here , hope your friend is indeed ok. Cheers
 
Hey man no bun intended I'm in the same boat coming off heroin (heavy) for years , today actually is my 1 year anniversary well tonight technically lol funny I remember exact time and date. But I went to methadone and I'm actually cold turkyn off that right now I only had a dozen Suboxone it didmt even come close to helping my addiction. I have 1 left so I'll take a piece at my absolute worse. But yea man I was never suicidal in my life until this shit so I don't know I guess I tend to say shit when I'm not feeling good.

Glad your still on here , hope your friend is indeed ok. Cheers
I know you're going through a rough time too (read and wrote on your thread), and I feel for you. Oh, do I ever. Yesterday, no joke, I felt like coming on here and saying I'd rather be dead then feel like this. But I didn't even want to talk to anyone. How contradictory of me.

And I too say things I don't really mean when going through withdrawals. I just never went through them within the past 3 years using them for over 24 hours. Now it being over 2 weeks, I'm shocked I made it and want to keep going.....
 
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