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no purpose

B

bignig5971

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 28, 2008
Messages
51
Location
Tallahasse,florida
My dad told me the other day that he wishes i wasn't born because of all the suffering and pain in the world. He said as soon as i was born he felt bad at what he had now done. This kinda hurt my feelings. Should nobody have children because of all the hate,crime and pain in the world?
 
Wow your dad is so pessimistic. In my opinion, even if that were the case, you shouldn't ever tell your children that. Be the bigger man, let him know there's more to life than hate and despair. There's love and herb :) Good music, good food! Good people!! Cheer up buddy.
 
Thanks for advice. I do feel like the good times in my life far outway the bad times. Most of us users have experienced the entire spectrum of human emotions.
 
The purpose of life in my opinion atleast is to live it the way you want and do as much as you can to be happy. If i can manage that then theres a purpose to living.
 
Parents can sometimes say things out of frustration that hurt us, and sometimes are way off base.
I don't know your story but he may be trying to say things that hurt to make you look at your situation.........He may also just be a jerk ;)

As far as the question of whether or not to have children b/c of the crime and pain in life............everyone has a different opinion on this.
I've looked at the things that have been hard in my life and thought- I would rather not have another person suffer that way. BUT then I think of the beauty of life, and I personally believe if a soul is going to be born, it is going to be brought into the world by me or someone else.......
I want to have children one day (maybe) b/c to me, the darker times are lessons that everyone will have to face in order to grow.....and the good out weighs the bad.
Yeah, life can give you a shitty hand, but you play the game with the hand you've been dealt- You learn the lessons you need to learn, you can come out on top.

I think having a spiritual base (I'm not talking belonging to an organized religion) can help you find what your purpose is- and what life in general can offer you.
(At least, this has been the case for me)

I hope things look up for you and you find your path <3
 
Ah yes parents they can sure make you feel really great sometimes :| . They just say shit like that out of frustration or whatever like Ocean said and sadly we tend to hurt the ones closest to us the most simply because there opinions matter more. Or ya your dad could just be a jerk one or the other 8)

Make your own way in this world never mind what your parents say. You gotta do what makes you happy and what you want to do.
 
Just treat you fellow man the way you want to be treated but watch out for the bad people as well. Stay positive & positive things will happen.
 
^ The more you give, the more you shall receive. Maybe not from the person you give to, but through other ways. It seems to be the cycle of life.
 
i know you found that hurtful. i would too. but know that your parents really do love you.


i can kind of see what your dad means, and what he was trying to say..

i personally have made the choice to never have kids. kinda for this reason...but mostly because well, i just have no desire to have any! and i am the most irresponsible, careless, selfish person in the world. i should not have kids. i feel like parents have a HUGE responsibility. the way i see it: i didn't ask to be here, i don't want to be here. YOU brought me into this world, so you have a duty that all parents should have...to care for, protect, and provide. and ALWAYS be there.

i also have drug/alcohol addictions, PLUS mental illnesses on top of that [OCD, PTSD, major depression, anxiety/panic attacks]...addiction and mental illness run in the family. i don't want to have kids, because i am terrified of passing on my genes to them. i just think i would have some fucked up kids.
 
As ocean stated, there are many possible reasons behind why your father might have said that to you. I don't know you or your father so I don't really want to go into that part of your post. However, being a parent myself I'm quite happy that i brought my daughter into this world.

Yes there are many bad things out there but there are also many very good things in life. These good things far and wide outweigh the bad. You already know that deep down, I don't have to go into detail there. For some reason this reminds me of something Theodore roosevelt said...

""It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat."

Take that however you want
 
I really appreciate everyone's response and advice. I feel a lot better now. My life is okay I guess because I'm close to graduating college but he may be refering to my legal trouble that almost cost me my freedom. I'm off probation and taking thing one day at a time. In any case you all confirmed for me that there is purpose.
 
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