• NMI Moderators: M!$TER-ED

Newbie here

Believe me, I will never use it again. Never. I've still not slept, getting ready for work now. Side note, I told my bf and he refuses to speak to me. Said I lied to him about it. I didn't lie. He asked if I had taken a Xanax and I told him 'no' because I hadn't taken one. I told him this morning what I had done because I don't want secrets between us. He left for work with barely telling me goodbye. How can I make this up to him? Anybody else had to beg for forgiveness?

Hello. You have had a rough time and need to just put him out of your mind and relax. Best way with no drugs etc is a dark room and a cool flannel on your eyes. No technology. Maybe sone music on quiet.


I used to get aggro from my ex for doing drugs with my friends and not him but never gave him shit about him doing the same. Maybe its a control thing? Dunno.

Your partner can go and have a little sook but you were honest and didnt do anything to deceive him so just leave it and let him have a time out to get over it. You dont need to get forgiveness from him. Just ease up and take care of tourself.
 
I was in a similar situation. Except I hid my drug use for 6 weeks before telling my husband. He was very hurt and disappointed but didn't want to throw away 11 years and 2 kids for it. I stopped using about 54 hours ago and took suboxone. Trying to get past withdrawals. He is proud of me for admitting the use and subsequently stopping the drugs. Just give your bf time and if he can't accept your honesty of using meth 2 times, then it may be worth it to move on from him.
 
Hi. Im glad you were strong enough to tell your husband. And glad he was willing to stand by your side. As for me, ive not seen M since he left, and very little communication. Im lost and all alone. I have been racked with guilt, shame and embarrassment. I dont know which way to turn. I have stood by him threw all of his fuck ups. Always had my arms, ears, heart and wallet open to him. Have even allowed myself to be treated in ways i knew were wrong. Ive made mistakes in our relationship. This was by far the biggest and clearly the final. Ive actually not been in contact wirh my son because of ' my man.' Yet i stood by M because I love him. Here i sit looking at the tatt i got less than a month ago with 'our saying' on my foot, feeling like the biggest piece of shit because of what Ive done. Everything in my life is falling apart. I hope it turns out better for you, Good luck my friend.
 
If he isn't man enough to stand by you the one time you mess up, he isn't a real man. Don't feel down about yourself. The first time I tried h I almost died and had a heart attack and respiratory pneumonia. Mind you I was 23 at the time. I was hospitalized for 3 days and out on aspirin for a few months daily. Then I went and did it again for 6 weeks and was forgiven. So if my husband can be understanding and notice that he has messed up and been forgiven a lot too then your man should step up and forgive you. You messed up. We all do. Don't let him make you feel like you aren't worth it, because you are. If he doesn't come back, it's his loss. You just know that you are worth it.
 
That must have been very scary for you. It soungs like you have a wonderful husband. Youre very lucky. In all honesty its an odd relationship to begin with. M was a friend of my sons. I started picking up green from M shortly after my huband died. One thing lead to another. Here we are almost 4 yrs later. I love him. He says he loves me. But like i said, havent seen him since 5am on friday morning. It just sucks to have somebody say you can tell them anything when really you can't. Ive lost a lot over this situation. Think his inability to forgive is because hes 25?
 
I was 25 once upon a time. It was only 3 years ago actually haha. But 25 is too young to be understanding. That's when you feel like you have the right to f up and no one is supposed to do it to you. He is really immature still and I know you love him but he isn't emotionally mature enough yet. How did your son handle you saying his friend? You must look really good for your age to get a 25 year old haha. I sent you a friend request also. Not sure how that all works but if we are allowed to privately talk, feel free to message me or whatever. I have no idea how this thing works haha. My mom was pissed when I told her and she came to the hospital. She was a cardiac nurse so her young daughter having a heart attack was awful. Lots of crying.
 
Well I guess that's good haha. Still have no idea what I'm doing.. are you feeling better? I mean obviously it's gonna hurt. Especially love. How long were you married?
 
I am doing better. Thank you. Went to work today. I swear 96 hours a week is what will kill me. I was married J for 26 years. Could set my watch by that man. I never wanted for anything. Best father any child could want or need . 4 days after pulling the plug his gf called. Blew me out of the water! I had no clue. My life has been one thing after another since. M is wanting to see me 'some time'. Im so confused. How are you feeling?
 
I'm doing alright. I have been off h for 85 hours now. M said he wants to see you 'some time'? Like he is done with the relationship? And your husband had a gf?! Oh man. Why did she call anyway? There was no need to call you haha. Well I'm glad your marriage was amazing until he died. M sounds like he's a douche. You may be better off with out him. 96 hours is a very long week. What is it that you do? I'm a nanny for 2 kids. The boy has autism but high functioning.
 
Congrats on the 85 hours!! Not sure why she called, and it was on valentines day. Sigh, some people. How funny! Thats what everybody says about M. Im in the legal field. It is a long week and thats only one of my jobs. Im so tired of all of it. You must have a lot of patience to watch child and have some at home.
 
Just not sure i have anything left to give M. Ive given him everything hes ever asked for. Even paid bills by myself for a minute while we lived together so he could get a Harley,
 
Wow. He took advantage of your kindness.. I do have a lot of patience.. maybe it's a gift haha. I have a 3 year old and a 2 year old. Both boys. The kids I nanny are 12 and 8. And I also watch their dog sometimes when they leave for more than a day. I would just take your time and move on from him. He's a bum for leaving. Where do you live if you don't mind me asking. I'm in ny.
 
I just tried to message you but it might have went to someone else haha but maybe it went to you... any case I'm gonna try again in 180 minutes since you can only send 1 message every 180 minutes haha
 
I got it but can't respond for another hour ? Haha but when I can I am going to message you back.. maybe the time thing is cuz we are newbies
 
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